Well at last it’s here, my long awaited 2 years smoke free, I find it hard to express how I feel, I have found myself thinking of smoking this week quite a lot, but that seems to be the norm with me just before I have reached some of the bigger milestones along the way, it’s as if I am scared/worried that I will inadvertently find myself with a ciggy in my hand, since the first day of my quit I have never been without a pack of tobacco in my possession, I know that I could not have survived without it, it has been my safety blanket.
At one stage there was one a full pack in the bedroom which came back from Spain, a single one in the kitchen and one in the car, over the 2 years I have gradually given them away and now I have one, I call it my just in case pack, it leaves me in control of my choices not the other way round, without it I would have maybe panicked but I would go and open the draw and say to myself, you can have one if you want one but given the choice I stayed smoke free, if I had not had it in the house I would have brought some and then I would definitely have lit up, I know this for sure.
Some of you will think it strange and see it as having temptation their all the time, but if you look at it like it was maybe my form of NRT then it will not seem such a mad idea, each to their own and no matter how you manage your quit so long as you are smokefree that's all that matters
Looking back at the start of my quit I see that a lot of the people who gave me a vast amount of support when I was having a shit day don’t seem to come on very much anymore, but I suppose they have like we all will eventually have hit a point in their quit where they no longer remember to come on, I seem to go for days and then think, I must go and have a peek, I maybe don’t support as much as I should but there are some great supporters about so I pass the buck :rolleyes:
I wish you all a very happy Christmas and I hope that if nothing else the New Year will be smoke free and healthy for you all, take care.
PS Thanks for sticking with it, it always seems to turn from a few short comments into a monologue