Day 18 and I nearly crumbled yesterday

Hi all,

Jst wanted to get this off my chest as it was a very close call, day 17 yesterday and I had been in a really aggresive/angry modd all day, this led to me thinking "I cant keep being like this perhaps if I just have one I will calm down", I even went to the shop and bought some ciggie's, had one out of the box ready to go and everything, I just couldn't bring myself to light it I knew that all of my hard work would have been for nothing.

I am pleased to say that I am now on day 18 and still smoke free, I left the ciggies for my partner to take away(still a smoker), I do feel a lot calmer today but still have a couple of questions.

1, Is the rage and that is the only way I can explain it normal, I felt really aggresive and even shouted at the kids????

2, Do you think that yesterday was the nico monsters final big push to try and break me or will I have a repeat of this over the next few weeks???

I look forward as ever to all ofyour advic

Charlie

3 Replies

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  • Hi Charlie,

    Its absolutely awful to feel that aggression and the feeling you could rip someones head off, even the kids :eek: But totally normal and I doubt anyone escapes feeling like that, I felt like it for ages and seriously contemplated smoking again if only so I could be nicer to my friends and family! But logically, smoking doesn't make you calmer at all and the only sensible thing is to ride the storm and it will pass really soon!

    So in answer to your questions, yes the anger and moods = perfectly normal, but as for the nico monsters final push I dont think so, he could strike at any time in the future, just be prepared thats all!

    There is a link on the whyquit.com website which saved me when I thought I would start again, its about anger and moods and how it is more of a knee jerk reaction to feelings we have bottled up as smokers and now as ex smokers them feelings escalate and come to a head.

    Read that website its a pretty straightforward no nonsense guide to quitting and the reading material on there will keep you going till you get past this horrible stage!

    Good Luck :D

  • Hang in there jingles. I was feeling the same way around the 18 day mark and luckily it passed. I'm only on day 24 so not too far in front of you but feeling better this week. Great job with leaving the ciggies for your partner to take away were all proud of you.

  • Hi Jiggles

    My only advice if you have not already is to read Allen Carr's EASYWAY book.

    Maybe you have or are. I am on day 16 (I think) and I am constantly cleaning out all the brainwashing that smoking was anything other than nicotine addiction.

    Mood swings are normal me thinks and yes I believe that the little monster is putting up that last big fight.

    I always struggled with day 3 and beginning of week 4. There is always that temptation to prove you don't need a cig by trying to smoke one. And then it's back to square one and day one.

    Keep reading, keep educating yourself of the crazy addiction it is.

    I've got books, hypnosis and this forum and I feel on top of the world and look forward to a better life. I think my kids have noticed I'm a nicer person.

    The shame :)

    I thinks it's great you had the cig in your hand but didn't light it. If you have a next time see if you can hold back from buying the fags. They say if you can hang in there for 5-10 mins when the monster raises it's head the feeling passes. THat's what they say :o

    They way I feel right now I wish I could pass it on to everyone who smokes or wishes they could smoke.

    Keep on keeping on Jiggles and sorry for rambling

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