For years and years I've been telling myself and others that I ENJOYED smoking and didn't want to stop - that was probably true for most of it, but some time in the last year the "enjoyment" started to wear off.
I tried to quit a couple of years ago - but I realise now that my heart wasn't really in it then.
Now I'm in a happy, settled relationship - OH doesn't smoke, he quit a few years ago, but he never criticised ME for smoking as he's been there himself - and smoked MORE than me at the time. After a while though I started to think how unfair it was to smoke around him - he never once asked me to quit, I had to come to that decision myself - it was just getting around to it that was my problem!
Then I got a bad chest infection - I spent a couple of weeks coughing so much that I could hardly talk, yet I STILL smoked (I figured it calmed my cough whenever I had one....:confused: ).
Two lots of antibiotics later and the cough was FINALLY getting better - then I went and caught a cold and it came STRAIGHT back, before it had ever really gone. I still continued to smoke - however this time I realised I wasn't enjoying ONE single cigarette. I could actually TASTE the tar in each one, and was imagining it dripping into my lungs every time I inhaled.
I'd been thinking about quitting for a while anyway, and I KNEW the time had come!
I thought I could go cold turkey at first - I spent a well-intentioned day losing my temper with everyone at work for no apparent reason and randomly bursting into tears - later at home I was climbing the walls and screaming like a banshee at poor OH....
So I caved in and went to the shop for a pack of 20. I STILL wasn't enjoying smoking and wanted to stop - so I decided to do it with a bit of help instead! The next day I went out and bought some patches, and stuck the first one on before bed,hoping it would get to work before I woke up.
It obviously did the trick, as it's now 7 weeks (ish) on, I'm still smoke free and determined to stay that way, and about to open my LAST pack of the lowest dose patches before I banish that NicoDemon for good! (His back's broken and I'm in control!)