A gentle plea: Something I keep seeing... - Weight Loss Support

Weight Loss Support

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A gentle plea

Subtle_badger profile image
โ€ข92 Replies

Something I keep seeing here, and it makes me sad. Someone will post a brief question with not much context. They typically seem quite plaintive, and tear at your heartstrings, so I see a lot of really helpful answers; some giving general advice, some asking questions so they can understand, and others speculating on what might be happening.

But there is no response from the OP. Complete radio silence. Not even the tiny act of clicking the like button (at least on my answers!) There are some who never come back, and others who you know will come back asking a similar question in a few weeks, giving no indication they read the previous responses.

I really admire those who have been providing support on here for ages, and the admins who welcome every newcomer. It's often a thankless task, but it's important for those of us who decide to fully join the community and those that find some help in a shorter visit.

Venting is OK. I have to say that, because I am venting now ๐Ÿ˜. So if you are just venting, then say that; but if you ask a question, come back make some acknowledgement to those that attempt to answer it.

That's it. I feel better now.

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Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger
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92 Replies
โ€ข

Hear hear. I think sometimes people are searching for magic & when they donโ€™t get weird tip /easy answers for weight loss, they go off.

Note: My favourite weird tip is getting rid of a huge belly overnight. I did it on New Years Eve 2012. And now the house is full of Lego & other bits of random plastic that I am not allowed to throw away. And my mind is permanently full of worry that not enough piano practice gets done.

Sorry to reduce the seriousness of your point. I am procrastinating from home.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to

โ˜บ

It's a vent. Any response is OK.

Glad you lost that belly fat. Perhaps the ultimate example of "better out than in"

in reply to Subtle_badger

It was all about timing. By 39 weeks +10 days it was definitely a case of better out than in... Not sure what came out could be classed as belly โ€˜fatโ€™ though ๐Ÿคฃ

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to

ROFLMAO !!!!! I made the same mistake a few times myself you know, in 1969, 1973 & 1980 to be exact!!! Oh yes, I remember it well!!

in reply to BrynGlas

But itโ€™s a great way to lose a lot of weight very quickly. Better than amputation as a weird tip to lose a stone overnight...

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to

You are dead right, even the pain & hard work was worth it!

wa2un7 profile image
wa2un7Maintainer

Well said๐Ÿ‘

SofaJockey profile image
SofaJockey

It's a fair point. The 'drop-and-go' posts can be frustrating for those who replay. Though I suspect some of those who are posting may have more than ample issues of their own, so I take solace that the replies, even if read un-replied, may not only may help them, but also many more who read the replies to posts made by others. ๐Ÿ˜Š

Cosmo501 profile image
Cosmo50110 kg

Yes... I often worry about people who post, seeming really in need, but then just vanish! Sometimes I check a profile to see if they've posted or replied elsewhere... more often than not there is nothing.. and I wish those people would stick around because it really seems they could do with the support that we all can find and give here.

Dizzytwo profile image
Dizzytwo

Rightly or wrongly, that's the nature of all forums I'm afraid.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to Dizzytwo

I think it's more common on wellness sites, because those visiting are more desperate.

And this is easily the worst forum site I have ever experienced. I manage a forum (as install the software on my own server), that was less complicated than learning to navigate this site.

TheAwfulToad profile image
TheAwfulToadVisitor

As SofaJockey mentioned below, I guess many of those posters have problems that extend beyond just healthy eating or losing weight.

What really upsets me personally is that they've probably been slowly maneuvered into a position where they're afraid to look in the mirror, afraid to go out, and afraid to even eat a proper meal, by decades of horrible advice about "weight loss". They are, I suspect, beyond help without professional intervention.

Anyway, as others mentioned, it may be that our answers do register, and perhaps give them something to think about. And even if not, perhaps they might be useful to others. Or at least of some entertainment value. So I'll keep replying.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to TheAwfulToad

Good. I know we can't know what's in someone's heart, which is why this was generic, not pointed to any individual. That failed, as someone has taken it as a personal attack ๐Ÿ˜ข

Somewhat more than half the point of posting this was to gee-up those doing the labour.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Subtle_badger

Chin up, there is always someone and why on earth that is true I have no idea, but it is. It seems to be an internet phenomena if some kind, maybe because everyone is a bit removed, almost incognito I suppose. But that is no excuse, is it? It must have been a guilt thing??? Still no excuse though.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to BrynGlas

I do seem to have a rather brusque manner (aka abrasive) that can show in posts as hostility where there is no intention of harm. So I don't blame someone for misunderstanding me.

in reply to Subtle_badger

I think youโ€™ve mellowed lately.... ๐Ÿคฃ

Leeleepuss profile image
Leeleepuss in reply to

Agreed ๐Ÿ˜Š

Leeleepuss profile image
Leeleepuss in reply to Subtle_badger

I was a bit scared of you when I started on here ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to Leeleepuss

Oh dear ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

Leeleepuss profile image
Leeleepuss in reply to Subtle_badger

Not any more though. I love your humour ๐Ÿ˜Š You and Hidden really make me laugh ๐Ÿ˜

in reply to Subtle_badger

You are fab.

Iโ€™ve just had to give my sister a very serious talking to (about lightweight stuff like not believing an abusive narcissist of a husband) and I like to think youโ€™ve inspired me a bit to be more brave & say the things that matter.

I love you Subtle_badger in a non harassing & purely supportive way.

Xxx

TheAwfulToad profile image
TheAwfulToadVisitor in reply to Subtle_badger

That has happened to me several times. I found the absolute worst place for hit-and-run posts, people with mental issues, and personal attacks was the Diabetes and Hypertension forum. I got into a protracted debate there with someone who professed to be an NHS official. I suggested that if someone has T2D, the best evidence-based course of action was to switch to a LCHF diet. She accused me of (among a slew of other things) "taking away people's choices" and "confusing" people. Sigh.

I wouldn't ordinarily have been dragged into a long back-and-forth, but I figured it was worth setting out the scientific facts to ensure she didn't cause harm to vulnerable people. Hopefully she was just a random nutcase; if she actually did work for the NHS, well, I despair.

KayCan profile image
KayCanVisitor

I have just joined this forum recently so am relatively new, but I have to tell you that I am also on the fertility and NCT forums and it is the same there. You invest time to respond/advise and although some have been grateful for advice, I've had some that have just been plain nasty and messaging me direct, not something I need at 37 weeks pregnant. I find that the majority of people posting are genuinely wanting advice or a place to vent but there are an odd few that have other underlying issues that need addressed, and as much as you advise them, they are either attention seeking or just don't want to hear it. I will keep being me though and will help where possible ๐Ÿ™‚

Just so you know, I'm not losing weight just yet but joined this group in preparation post having baby โค

Gonti profile image
Gonti10 kg in reply to KayCan

An exciting time for you despite everything else going on.! Great good luck and dont worry about baby weight for a long long time.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to KayCan

Oooh a new baby, I hope we can have a pic one of these days?????

Lavender54 profile image
Lavender54 in reply to KayCan

How lovely, a new baby, so exciting.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas

Weeeeellllll I appreciate you all. You all deserve a big pat on the back. Apart from anything else, you all lift my spirits. So thanks to you all, I appreciate you very much.

Now ...............where do I go to find someone who can lend me a battery charger? Because usually with my Volvo, I switch the ignition off and everything goes off, lights Michael Bublรจ full blast, everything!

I went shopping this morning, turned off the ignition, unloaded my shopping - I had to have turned the ignition off because my door key is on my car key ring don't forget!

Prince Edward - aka Ted - wanted to go out 20 mins ago & when I opened the door I was stunned to find that my car was there sitting on the drive with all of the lights blazing! Battery as flat as a pancake, though the lights were on full blast! I have been telling myself for weeks that I must buy a battery charger!

Dear me, what next I wonder?

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to BrynGlas

Normally you would ask a neighbour to give you a jump start, but has research been done to say if the virus can transmit via cables?

Leeleepuss profile image
Leeleepuss in reply to BrynGlas

Oh no what a pain! I used to have a car which had a flat battery regularly and then the immobiliser would kick in and it had to be towed to a dealership! I hope you got yourself mobile again.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Leeleepuss

Yes thanks, everything is ok and my new battery charger might be here tomorrow, fingers crossed.

SewMore profile image
SewMore in reply to BrynGlas

Speaking of car batteries - this happened to my colleague- the battery was dead in the morning. She charged it, happened again the next day. The garage replaced the battery. It happened again. It turned out there was a loose connection! The car boot light was not switching off when the boot was closed, and that was draining the battery every night! I hope you manage to find someone to help you jumpstart it.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to SewMore

Sarah73uk, yes everything is sorted out now thanks.

The only thing I don't know is how it was that the lights were on even after I had turned off the ignition, opened the front door and left my keys in the house while I took my shopping out of the boot! That has never happened before with this car and I have had it for 4 or 5 years now minimum. You turn off the ignition and everything is turned off except the courtesy light. You can't use the stereo or radio when the ignition is off, or open/close the windows either, so it's a mystery she says. Whilst inside my head I am singing........

'It's a mystery, it's a mystery'

where the hell that came from I have no idea. Who sang it and how long ago??????

Leeleepuss profile image
Leeleepuss in reply to BrynGlas

Toyah back in the 80's!!

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Leeleepuss

YESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!! She says punching the air and Ted is not amused, he hoped I had forgotten all that when the 6 Nations was cancelled much to my horror! ( I agree with it stopping, honestly I do, but I only found rugby last year!)

Toyah, of course, how can I have forgotten La Toya???

Thanks for that nudge Leeleepuss. Do I gather that you have a cat/cats?

Leeleepuss profile image
Leeleepuss in reply to BrynGlas

Saw Toyah last summer at one of those 80s festivals, she was pretty good actually ๐Ÿ˜Š

Yes well spotted. I have a very spoilt tabby boy called Leo who has just come strutting in! Leeleepuss is his nickname. Is Prince Edward a cat or a dog?

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Leeleepuss

Oooos, sorry, yes Ted is a cat, I am withou a dog at the moment unfortunately. Prince Edward, arrived unexpectedly one day after I had cleared the freezer out (which is in an outbuilding) and there was a full pack of sausages on the top of a bag of food awaiting incineration. Before it got any further I noticed that something had opened the pack and there was a sausage missing.

So I am thinking foxes/badgers, etc but I left dried cat food & water out and saw this little Felix look alike coming to eat. It took me ages to get him into the house, but once he was in he didn't go out again for over 6 months. He does go out at least once a day now, if it is dry and not howling a gale (which is something that is often going in here) but he is the most loving and lovable cat I have ever had. I don't know where he came from, whether he was dumped, or his owner had died or something, but I am glad he is here now, he is definately a woman's cat I would say.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to BrynGlas

My aunt had a cat that was called Ted Green. Yup, given name and surname. Named after a person I never met, who was a bit annoying. The cat was an arsehole. Really. I don't know about his namesake, though.

My aunt never became a mad cat woman, but she was devoted to Ted Green.

It's a perfect memory for right now.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Subtle_badger

I never heard of a cat being an a**e**le before! Roflmao!

I dread to think what behaviour Ted Green exhibited to becworthy of that description! ;-)

Prince Edward really is the purrfeck cat you know. He is clean, very freindly, not at all greedy, not too fussy with food, is keen on visitors too these days. I suppose he has been here for at least 2 years now and realises that no 'strugs' have hurt him up to now & so he greets people these days within a few minutes of them sitting down with a cuppa. Everyone is taken with him and vice versa.

When he wants to go out when a gale is blowing the rain into the front of the house sideways and I open the door for him he is so funny.

He pokes his nose out, or actually gets through the door and he lets out this sort of a 'bah humbug' sound and comes back inside again quicker than he went out! He has me in stitches many a time. I am very thankful for Ted, believe me.

Leeleepuss profile image
Leeleepuss in reply to BrynGlas

What a lovely story. You and Ted were obviously meant to find each other and he sounds like perfect company. I have known quite a few cats who were a holes and tbh Leo can be one at times! He was a rescue and had formed behaviour patterns before he arrived here. He was hit by a car pretty badly at around 10 months and we didnโ€™t think he was going to make it, but he hung in there and after some pretty extensive (and very expensive!) surgery came home minus a kidney and one hip joint. I found him after the accident and he rested his head on my hand all the way to the vet hospital and from then on has been firmly my cat! He tolerates my husband, loves my son and hates one of my daughters!! He takes a swipe at her quite regularly but doesnโ€™t actually hurt her. I think she just irritates him ๐Ÿ˜‚ He also has a heart murmur brought on by the stress of the accident and the very tip of his tail turned white! But he leads a very normal life, tears around the garden, climbs trees and hunts and Iโ€™m very happy that he made it.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Leeleepuss

Ahhh, Leo seems to have found his place in the world too, then. What a time he had before he met you, poor thing.

Why on earth people won't get their cats neutered God only knows. It is appalling here, people think that there is no need to neuter anything!

Ted often gallops around the house at a rate of knots too, particularly when he has just come in from outside, or around 10pm when he decides that he has woken after his long day snoozing on his heated pad! ;-) Speaking of which, he is tearing around the kitchen, around and around the island - a modest island it is.

If someone had asked me to rehome a cat I would never have agreed, because the last of my 5 cats had recently died at the age of 19 so I was not thinking of taking on any more after becoming an oap. But Ted found me and we are very happy together I am pleased to say.

Leeleepuss profile image
Leeleepuss in reply to BrynGlas

Wow, 19! Thatโ€™s a grand old age. I def think cats pick you, not the other way round ๐Ÿ˜Š

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Leeleepuss

Yes, most of mine have lived between 17 and 18 years, that is another reason why I didn't think it was a good idea to have another cat.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to BrynGlas

Ted Green used to walk along inside of shelves that held valuable knick-knacks in what seemed to be a deliberate act to break them.

Ted Green would jump on the table and sample cakes before they were iced.

My aunt lived with her mum (aka grandma). Ted Green did not like grandma, so regularly scratched her.

They had a gate between their garden and next door. Ted Green would walk up to the gate and casually slash the nose of the very stupid poodle who was always watching what we were doing.

Note: he was never Ted or Teddy. Always Ted Green.

I've got a worse one, though: Charlie, my dad's neighbour's cat. Charlie's owner had two dogs, so Charlie spent most of his time in dad's garden. When I returned home to bury my dad, Charlie that the meat scraps I was feeding to the carnivore wild birds (who were nearly dad & mum's pets) was for him. When he realised he was wrong, he cold bloodedly sank an incisor deep in my calf, leading to a tetanus shot and two courses of antibiotics.

Bee-bop profile image
Bee-bopMaintainer2st 7lbs

Hi there, just wanted to say that I have had it on the patient website where I don't always get notifications. It means I don't know I have a reply at all.

I am only just getting used to this site and don't even know how to put my weight loss on here? I notice others have their weight next to their username. I may have missed something ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

I am doing SW and usually I have a weigh in every week but , has been suspended due to Covid-19. I have had good results from SW and have lost 1stone 12Lbs since November. I don't have weighing scales at home.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to Bee-bop

I can help!

The weights by the username are badges. They are supplied by the admins, and are a reward for weighing in. You pick a day of the week to weigh-in, put your weight last week and this week and your starting weight, cheer on a few other users and your reward will be a badge.

Can I suggest you cheat a little and share your last 2 weigh ins from SW and keep turning up at your weekly weigh in even if you don't have new weight to chat about your progress and cheer on the others. I would hope the admins will be kind enough to give you a badge even if you can't weigh yourself.

Can I also suggest that if you don't want a scale at home, then you should be able to pick up a tape measure for about ยฃ1, and that will give you a way of marking your progress or making sure you aren't going off track.

Thursdays weigh in has just opened healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

And generally you can find the daily weigh ins by going to healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... and paging down to events.

Oh, if you are using the iPhone app, I believe it is terrible. Just go to this site using your browser.

Bee-bop profile image
Bee-bopMaintainer2st 7lbs in reply to Subtle_badger

Thank you, that helps! I will think about putting my last 2 weigh ins although it may be a while before I can report a further weigh in.

Yes, I have a tape measure, this has been a really good way to keep an eye on my weight loss. 7 inches so far which I am really proud of. It is hard to believe that I have managed this, I think I had a very different picture in my mind when I began my weight loss journey.

No, no iPhone app ๐Ÿ™‚

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to Bee-bop

I am sure no one would mind you weighing-in using inches.

I was thinking of doing it, but after 10cm (4") in a month, my waist is not budging. The scale can still be coaxed down a few grams.

Bee-bop profile image
Bee-bopMaintainer2st 7lbs in reply to Subtle_badger

Thank you, my measure can fluctuate a little but is still a lot less which is great. It is strange how the two don't always go together? Waist loss doesn't always equate weight loss and vice versa. I haven't had a scale for many years so it was good having the weekly weigh in. I take waist measurement as I have a goal I am aiming for in that department.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Bee-bop

It helped me too Bee-bop

But in my head now I am singing..

'....a loolah, she's my baby.......

Bee-bop a loolah, I don't mean maybe,

Bee-bop a loolah she... ee ..ee's

My baby doll, my baby doll.....'

How do I get rid of that now for goodness sake????????

Wish I could post some weight loss, nothing is moving except the cat's ears here (because I am tickling them with a tissue! Naughty mummy aren't I?

Bee-bop profile image
Bee-bopMaintainer2st 7lbs in reply to BrynGlas

LOL ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

Remember: Maintaining isn't gaining ๐Ÿ˜‰

Aw, cute with the cat, we have a rabbit and two Guinea pigs that 'permit' us to stroke them.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Bee-bop

Great minds think alike then!

I could practically kill to have a dog around the house too, I would definately have to stop being a fair weather walker couldn't I

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to BrynGlas

Oops! Sorry I pressed send too early!

Bee-bop profile image
Bee-bopMaintainer2st 7lbs in reply to BrynGlas

The children would like a dog but, we had a friend's dog to stay a while ok and no one wanted to clean up afterwards so, I remind them of that when it comes up ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Bee-bop

That side of things doesn't worry me, I have had dogs for years. The main thing that worries me is whether I might pop my clogs and leave the dog in need of another home. I do miss my dogs.

While I was in Stoke, I was looking in the various rehoming kennels for an older dog, but I couldn't afford to get one. I had to pay a minimum of ยฃ200 and I just couldn't afford that. I have just bought 600 litres of heating oil for ยฃ259 and I would not have been able to buy that if I had given a rescue dog a home. It is a shame, because I have 4 acres of walled fields/land here for a dog or two to run around in.

Bee-bop profile image
Bee-bopMaintainer2st 7lbs in reply to BrynGlas

I hear you, our rabbit was a rescue rabbit but it was a donation rather than set amount. Thats a lot of money! I think such amounts put people off. Can you foster? It sounds a great place for a dog! Many years ago I was asked if I could foster a cat from the cats prorection, I already was taking care of a few strays, due to move soon and pregnant so had to say no at the time.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Bee-bop

Yes, I offered the Whippet Rescue - among other rescue groups - a foster home for a couple of their dogs maybe, but that was a couple of months ago and had no answer at all from any of them. I don't want a puppy as I said, because I don't think it is a good idea at my age.

I was offered a 2 year old Springer, but I had to turn her down because they are such a high energy breed and I didn't think that that would have been good for either the dog or me!

Bee-bop profile image
Bee-bopMaintainer2st 7lbs in reply to BrynGlas

Yes, the dog has to fit the caretaker for sure. Maybe someone more suitable will come along soon.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Bee-bop

Yes, maybe there is one somewhere who I have just got to wait for.......hopefully.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to Bee-bop

Oops! Forgot to say: bloody brilliant weight loss. Well done. I hope you can use us for support until your group reforms.

Bee-bop profile image
Bee-bopMaintainer2st 7lbs in reply to Subtle_badger

Thank you, I am still a bit in shock with the weight loss ! Yes, I joined the group before the new rules around the stopping of groups meeting. I hope I can help others as well as stick with it myself in these trying times.

Lavender54 profile image
Lavender54 in reply to Bee-bop

Hello Bee-bop, great weight loss, well done you.

I had the same reaction as you, couldn't believe the loss until I measured my waist, 5inchs ! gone. My sister came to stay and was absolutely ruthless...'You can't go around like that with your clothes hanging off you!' So spent 2 days going through my clothes and donating everything big to the local Charity, I could have wept as some things were really nice. Now I haven't anything much to wear. I refuse to buy anything until I reach goal weight, aiming for May.

So onwards and downwards as they say. Interestingly my scales record a gain, but my tape measure says otherwise, so I prefer the tape measure.

Bee-bop profile image
Bee-bopMaintainer2st 7lbs in reply to Lavender54

LOL yes, go with the tape measure!

I too had to have an overhaul of the wardrobe which the charity shops benefitted from at least ๐Ÿ˜ƒ I had some clothes that I really liked but, if they literally are falling off, what can you do ?

It will be May in no time , good luck with your goal ๐Ÿ‘

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Bee-bop

Yes, I forgot to congratulate you Bee-pop, well done.

Bee-bop profile image
Bee-bopMaintainer2st 7lbs in reply to BrynGlas

Thank you ๐Ÿ™‚

moreless profile image
morelessAdministrator7 stone in reply to Bee-bop

Hi and welcome, Bee-bop :)

Subtle_badger has very kindly given you a very in-depth explanation. Here's the link to this forum healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

All of the information you need about the forum can be found in Pinned Posts healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... and I hope you'll be joining all the Events, Challenges and Clubs that we run, especially a weigh-in and the daily diary.

We've found active participation to be key to successful weight loss and, of course, it's a good way to get to know people, find inspiration and share support and encouragement.

Wishing you all the best :)

Bee-bop profile image
Bee-bopMaintainer2st 7lbs in reply to moreless

Thank you, I endeavour to join in as much as I can ๐Ÿ™‚

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to moreless

Ok, so you are teaching me more now moreless. Does it matter if we are in different weight loss groups on here? I am a member of a few I have to admit. Plus it would give me an added reminder to use my diary every day. For the last few days I have been remiss in that direction.

Interesting to read of all the 'encouragement' on here. Now we are moving into better weather I am hoping to get more walking done, I am a fair weather walker - aka bone idle????

BridgeGirl profile image
BridgeGirlAdministrator2 stone in reply to BrynGlas

Hello, BrynGlas, I'm not sure if you've had the "official" welcome :)

There is a weigh in each day: you choose the one that suits you. There's great team spirit (we ask everyone to reply to at least three others) and you'll get to know people for as long as your journey takes. You'll find the current weigh in, plus all other forum activities and a Welcome message, in Pinned Posts healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... The Daily Diary is also highly recommended, for sharing your meal plans.

And see Nutty Natterings for any old chat about anything.

All the best :)

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to BridgeGirl

You are right, I definately didn't know any of this, so apologies for never being to a weigh in because I had no idea that there was one or where I could find it!

Will try better, though I think it will have to get my mind into the necessary mood for losing weight, at the moment I am not there I don't think, so it would be futile, continually gaining by increments is driving me a bit stupid, really.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to BrynGlas

๐Ÿค—

BridgeGirl profile image
BridgeGirlAdministrator2 stone in reply to BrynGlas

Well, make the most of the forum and go at your own pace :)

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to BridgeGirl

I will BridgeGirl, thank you very much.

Leeleepuss profile image
Leeleepuss

I have found the advice Iโ€™ve received on here invaluable but when I first posted, tbh I did find the strong opinions of some of those responding a little overwhelming. Now I have got to know some of you, I can read answers with the intention with which they were written but did find it all a little intimidating to start with. I do love this group and need to try and join in more. Will prob have time now! ๐Ÿ™„๐Ÿ˜

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Leeleepuss

I agree, it certainly lifts my spirits on here. I look forward to my notifications no ebd.

Minniewinny profile image
Minniewinny5 stoneMaintainer

Well said ๐Ÿ‘

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Minniewinny

Minniewinny, you have had a good weight loss, what diet regime are you following?

I am having a horrible time being low thyroid and nothing is working for me as farcascweight loss goes to be honest.

I am currently following a vegan diet, but in fact I am gaining on it. Have tried every type of diet going and don't know whether there is any hope for me. I can't fast for ever, though that did work until I broke my fast, chose to go vegan and the gradual gain started again.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to BrynGlas

Oh, brynglas - that breaks my heart.

I've lost a little over 2 stone with LCHF and IF, but I assume you have tried that.

Look after yourself!

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Subtle_badger

Well, it is very upsetting I agree. It is grinding me down a bit more than usual. I just don't know what the hell else I can try really.

'Soul' & 'destroying' come to mind to be honest.

I don't mind the dietting, if it worked, but it doesn't work. Nothing seems to have worked since about last summer & I have tried all sorts.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to BrynGlas

So what have you tried? Have you tried low carb? Have you tried intermittent fasting?

I only have a hammer, so every diet problem looks like a nail.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Subtle_badger

Over the years I have tried everything. WW, SW, calorie counting, 5.2, 1 meal a day (low fat, low calorie), Atkins, LCHF, etc etc

I began to gain weight in about 1999 really. I had had a bit of weight gain previously, but nothing drastic and I could lose a couple of pounds easily. I was 10stone 3 lbs and 5'6" tall for years with hardly any variation. Always knew what size clothes, underwear etc I needed.

I was getting married in 1999. I was 47, post menopause.

I had tried HRT by then, but hadn't been kept on it after I gained 2 stones in weight with one type that they tried me on and when I went back for a check up 2 weeks later I had gained 2 stones. So my flirt with HRT was banned after that and they refused me any further trial of HRT. I did lose most of that 2 stones slowly.

So, I was getting married in 1999. I went to buy a wedding dress in Feb. 1999. I bought the first one I tried on, size 14 and brought it home.

My wedding was in 17th July 1999. Before I got that far I became aware that my clothes were getting tighter. My partner told me I was crackers and worried too much, but I knew I was right and fially tried on my wedding dress only to discover that the B thing would not fasten! This was probably about April/May if that year. Of course I determined that I had to lose weight before July 17th, only it didn't happen. I could not lose an ounce, no matter how hard I tried, in fact gram by gram I was gaining.

I finally had to find someone to try to 'let out'' my dress. There was enough fabric to get it to fasten at least, but it was not right and I felt awful in it, but could not afford to buy another dress, could I?

In was diagnosed low thyroid at about this point, was cock a hoop because all of my troubles were over, thyroxine was the magic pill that would get me back to normal but it never happened. I was to find out that Levothyroxine was not all that it could be to all people (mainly women apparently and I can't help but think that menopause has a lot to do with it in my case certainly).

I saw private doctor's and allsorts, but nothing worked and I finally buried my thyroid problems deep within my brain, took the medication routinely but stopped thinking about it because I was driving myself and my family daft, I knew it was wrong, but couldn't find a way of making it right!

After that, the only way was up, and up, and up. At my highest I was just over 15 stones. My GP told me that calories in had to be less than calories out and silly me was obviously too thick to understand that. A few GP's have told me that.

I have tried all sorts, I did lose 3 stones in 2011/2012 - calorie counting - and went from size 22 to size 14 which I was delighted with. I didn't go mad, waited until January 2013 until buying new clothes and the weight had been easy to maintain. I was totally surprised that I had lost weight because I had calorie counted before and there had been no weight loss, but I must never have quite done it properly, because I had the 3 stone loss to prove that I could in fact lose weight, so the Dr's had been right after all hadn't they?

I spent a fortune in the sales in January 2013 and was very happy. Thought what an idiot I had been all of those years of gaining and here I was, slim again!! I had been wrong to blame my hypothyroid after all, because I still had that so it must have been my own fault mustn't it??

In around Feb/March 2013 my clothes began to feel tight again. I was gaining weight. I of course turned to my pile of weight loss diaries and began again, only it didn't work this time. I did not worry about it because I had proved that I could lose weight before and I would do it again, but I didn't lose.

It was about this time that I started having fits again. I had been epileptic since the late 70's but undiagnosed until 1983/4. Now I could not drive again. I was put onto different medication, and git my licence back in December 2014.

My husband and I split in November 2018. I was about around 13 stones at this time. I had been trying to lose weight before that, SW, my own basics of calorie counting, the 5.2 diet had come out, about this time and I had tried that.... I had piles of diet books, tons of printed out gumph from the internet as well as my diaries. I kept food diaries as a matter of course, I have piles of them, along with graphs full of lines occasionally coming down ward, but mostly rising. I ate mostly low carb (my close family has a history of Type 1 diabetes, type 2 and coeliac disease) so I am very aware of carbs.

In January 2019 I began the year once more determined - it is something though that I become weary of when it doesn't work. But work it did, though slowly.

I got down to 12st 5lbs last summer before the weight gain started again. I tried once again, without an ounce of loss, but didn't gain either, so that was ok, though galling to say the least.

Before Christmas I bought myself a blood glucose monitor, the good news was that I didn't appear to have type 2 diabetes, the bad news was that I still didn't lose any weight, but kept on slowly gaining.

I tried fasting. Now that worked I lost a few pounds overcaround 5 or 6 days I think it was. That gradually came back and I have to ge honest, I did feel well after the first 2 days or of the fast, but I have come to the conclusion that a 67 year old woman and strict fasting are not compatible. I felt terrible for the next couple of weeks, which is when I started the vegan regime, abรฒut 5 weeks or so ago.

I have gained on it, predictably. I was this morning 13 st 2 lbs. I was surprised that I had not gained more, because I have been avoiding the scales for a couple of weeks now. I am no saint and daily disappointment does not sit well with me, though I am so used to it.

Take a deep breath & start again.

Sorry this has been such a depressing 'missive'!

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to BrynGlas

Thank you for sharing that. I wish I had some comfort to offer you. It really does seem you have tried everything.

OK, wracking my brain for anything missing: how low did your carbs get? Because the only thing you may not have tried is keto.

๐Ÿ˜” that I have nothing more to suggest.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Subtle_badger

I have tried zero carbs. When I tried Keto/LCHF the last time (around Christmas 2019) I was doing I think 20g max, (most days it would have been zero though) I need to dig out my diary.

I used to get into ketones, very, very dark purple dipsticks daily, but never had any weight change, I just stayed the same, or up a pound, down a pound every day!

When I say carbs, that means zero bread, rice, potatoes, even sweet potatoes or carrots, no fruit at all. Just greens, tomato with a salad, mushrooms which I love and I used to eat those cooked in oil or butter. I tried cream in my coffee which I loved, but dropped that because there was no weight loss.

I would eat a small steak, chicken, mostly, fish, eggs, prawns. My whole family think I am utterly crackers. I was staying with my brother in law for a lot of last year and we fell out frequently because I would refuse to eat 'normal' food. He cooked me a baked potato one night and there was a full scale war started because I wouldn't eat it! I just went to my room until he had calmed down. I have tried to explain my diet, but he had never experienced anyone dietting before at all, never mind doing low carb!

On vegan I have mushrooms, tomatoes, carrots, swede, cauliflower, courgette, lettuce, cucumber, chinese leaves, I have even had a limited amount of sweetcorn once a week max, because I am wary of the carbs. I bought a honeydew melon about 3 weeks ago, but I haven't dared cut it open yet ! ;-)

I am not using oil to cook with, I use fry lite but add a couple of teaspoons of oil to my food each day. I don't approve of oil free personally..

I have no dairy at all, I have given up coffee and have earl grey tea instead. It is still an acquired taste, but I did try some coffee (black) a couple of days ago and that didn't hit the spot either, so sticking to the tea.

I don't mind doing all of this. The experimenting might one day work, it did once in 2011/2012 remember. But nothing seems to be working at the moment and it is very demoralising.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Subtle_badger

Sorry, yes, I have tried Keto, the books are sitting on the top of my freezer now! LoL

You and me both, Subtle_badger, I wish I knew what to try next, but I don't have the foggiest idea.

Some good news though, I think I have found a rescue dog. Hopefully I can go and see him tomorrow. Just debating whether I should be naughty and disobey Boris to see him! Ted will have a shock, won't he? The trouble is that the rescue people will have to come here to 'vet' the house too, so will be opening myself to the virus more than if I stay at home, obviously.

Sweet n sour isn't it?

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to BrynGlas

Lol. Yes it is.

Tell the charity you can't have them in your house right now. Honestly, they shouldn't want to go in either. Offer them references. Tell them to check our house on Street view and google maps satellite. That should be enough.

Honestly, I think British animal charities have too much time on their hands.

/rant

Sorry I have nothing left to offer you on your diet. I am tempted to invite TheAwfulToad to give an opinion, but she's a bit scary sometimes, so I am not sure you want that.

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Subtle_badger

Well, I don't think that they will want to actually come into the house, though living alone here means that they could have a look through open doors etc, there are 3 'front doors' here after all. It was originally 2 separated cottages, now one.

And I will take 2 aerial photographs that I have showing the house, drive, and most of the land - a doggie paradise - 4 acres of walled fields, 1,000 ft up on a mountain, 1/4 of a mile from a road or any neighbours, what doggy (or rescue charity) would not love it??. It was bought specifically for lots of dogs and there are many of them buried in the pet cemetary which is where I will be buried too.

I think they are more interested in the land and whether it is well fenced, to stop my doggy wandering. And I have already had the 'great minds think alike' thought and written down my vets contact details so that they can speak to him. I have always told him that I should have shares in the place anyway, so I am sure that he will help.

Oh don't worry about me and my diet. I have had this trouble for years and I wish I hadn't, but worse things happen at sea. I get very down about it and I know that it sounds as though it can't be the truth, but I promise it is.

The people who I get most upset with are the GP's who obviously don't believe me and speak to me about it in a highly patronising way, as though I was just another stupid person who they have to speak sllloooowwwwwlllyy and very carefully to, because I am obviously too stupid to realise that I am just stuffing too much into my mouth and lying on the sofa all day. Now that I can't take, but it happens.

Anyway, maybe sooner or later something, (what, or when I don't know) might kick start itself again and I might start losing again, who knows?

And a dog will make me feel better hopefully.

Minniewinny profile image
Minniewinny5 stoneMaintainer in reply to BrynGlas

Hi BrynGlas

The 5 stones I have lost took years, I started by cutting out things that I was addicted to, chocolate and pecan danish. I did a short spell of the Cambridge diet (which is VLCD), I got to my target weight and gradually regained some.

I found and joined this forum and tried the 12 week plan, then calorie counting and eventually the LCHF with IF, I learnt a lot from dietdoctor.com and that is when I lost the rest and have been able to maintain without too much trouble.

The routine that works for me is 2 meals a day at 11am for brunch and dinner at 5pm, I generally have 20-50g of carbs a day as that is what suits me. Occasionally I fast as I enjoy the freedom to be food free some days, I also tried and enjoyed carnivore.. but never vegetarian or vegan. I do have some health issues like most, but thyroid is not one of them.

Have you spoken to your GP as it may be that a medication you take could slow your progress to lose weight? If you are vegan, what are you eating for healthy fats? Olive / avocado / sesame seed or coconut oils are good options. Eating a lower carb plan without good fats will leave you hungry and frustrated as the work will be hard with little rewards...

Sorry if this is too long an answer..

Cheering you on to success and better health as a result ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Minniewinny

Yes, I have spoken to GP's the only answer I have ever had is that I have to decrease calories in, increase calories out. Everyone sees a fat oap who is obviously stuffing herself stupid each day while sitting in her backside, not exactly in those words, but the disdain is always made pretty damned clear.

Minniewinny profile image
Minniewinny5 stoneMaintainer in reply to BrynGlas

Sorry to hear youโ€™ve not been supported. Stick with the forum as the wealth of experience on here can be really helpful.

Are you planning your meals in advance? The daily diary was a great help to me when I was losing weight, it helped me to think, plan, shop and stick to what I had committed to!

Wishing you success x

BrynGlas profile image
BrynGlas in reply to Minniewinny

No, I don't plan in advance. There is only me here and I prefer to just have what I fancy. Everything that I want to be off the menu is either in the freezers in the outbuildings, or I have cleared it out all together.

Having no one else to worry about makes my own choices very easy! I just use my usual A4 diaries & write it down as I prepare it.

I do have a couple of basic salad and other meal 'recipes' that I use regularly and I often batch cook stuff, so there are ready made meals in the house freezer, already calorie counted. I even keep my chocolate in the freezer, 95% cocoa stuff for when I need a fix!

Minniewinny profile image
Minniewinny5 stoneMaintainer in reply to BrynGlas

Sounds like you've got a good system in place ๐Ÿ‘

Strandready profile image
Strandready

Hello there

I should probably apologise as I'm not a very active member. But I do read people's comments and appreciate the time, effort & support. So thanks for reminding me Subtle_badge, you are right

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to Strandready

Oh, thank you. That is lovely.

๐Ÿ’

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