Embarrassed about weekly weigh-in - Weight Loss Support

Weight Loss Support

114,596 members60,925 posts

Embarrassed about weekly weigh-in

69 Replies

I'm too embarrassed to do the weekly weigh in. Not because the amount on the scales is really high, but because it might seem low to some here. My weight is too much for me, though I am a healthy BMI, I'm above the recommended inches. I don't want people to think I'm taking the mick out of them because I'm not that big in stones. I'm a very light build and all my weight is on my middle, and I wish to lose it 'cause belly fat isn't healthy. Also if I wear a tight top, people ask when I'm due ...

69 Replies
telute profile image
telute

People are a wide range of weights on the weekly weigh in - and no one is going to judge you!

You could always join a weigh in and ask if you can measure weekly inches if that would feel better?

in reply to telute

I might just do that. Thank you.

Stalk profile image
StalkRestart Jan 2024

I joined for the same reason as you, I'm in the "healthy" range, but my waist is much too large. (It's not as large as it was.)

The BMI is a very approximate measure.

Good luck with your "waist reduction" journey!

in reply to Stalk

Well done on your waist not being as large as it was!

mistymtnhop333 profile image
mistymtnhop333

It's a very welcoming community, I wouldn't be worried - everyone is on the path to becoming healthier, whatever that looks like for you. :)

I’m now in the healthy range of BMI myself, but carrying too much fat. Most people here know that the BMI band has varying applicability. Unless you put your height in, which no one does, no one really knows what your absolute weight number means. Happily people don’t judge here, just encourage each other to be realistic & keep plodding on. In a weekly weigh in, you’ll get to know each other, & they will come to know you & your challenges. If you are light as a feather but carrying a bit of lard, maybe think about doing some weights & check out your bone density (assuming you have not already.)

Juppy profile image
Juppy2 stone

Aww don’t worry about it. You will see there are many in the weigh ins who are at “healthy BMI” and are still trying to lose weight. For me, the “healthy” range on the charts is about 35 pounds. I feel best right in the middle, and in my 20s I was very healthy at the bottom of the range. However at the top of the range I am definitely 18 pounds overweight!

Now, we always worry about someone who wants to go too low, but as long as you are in the “healthy “ range and no one is telling you that you are too thin, you’re probably ok.

We all support each other whether we have 5 pounds to lose or 500... we’re all cheering each other on!

in reply to Juppy

That's me, at the upper end rather than the lower end. Losing about 11 pound will get me to slightly lower than middle, and that's where I want to be.

in reply to

You’re good company here then. There are people have come with 10lbs to lose, and people who have lost 6st but just gave another 5lbs to go. X

roshough profile image
roshough in reply to

I'm like you....not too heavy in comparison with the wonderful folks on this forum but too heavy for me. I would like to lose another 7 lb. So far the belly hasn't moved even a fraction of an inch.

in reply to roshough

It's hard to shift, isn't it?

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to Juppy

Yes. The range is huge. I have just lost 10kg and it's a massive change to my body shape. Apparently the range for my height is 18kg! That's insane. No one is at a healthy at one weight and 18kg more or less.

That said, I think the threshold for obesity is useful. We are all getting used to the new average body, and we need a clear way of realising we are too fat. There are outliers, but almost everyone at 30 BMI is very overweight. My GP doesn't know what obese looks like, and nor to most of the rest of us.

I had my lean body mass estimated by calipers when I was around 30. I remember it was 56kg. Women need 20% body fat to be healthy, that brings me to 67kg (at that time). According to BMI I should be between 52 and 70kg. 52 would have been death march muscle wasting for me at 30, and even 20+ years later with presumably less muscle, it's got to be still way too low. I 56kg was an estimate, but even with a huge margin of error, I would not be healthy 4kg less than that.

It's good to for me to remember this. My instinctual ideal goal weight was 68kg, which I think is pretty close to accurate. But it's also time to get my arse to a gym. I want to build muscle mass while I still can.

in reply to Subtle_badger

As I’ve said elsewhere, my mum has built muscle in her mid 70s through hydrotherapy. Never too late. X

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to

Well, maybe never too late to improve, but generally for building muscle mass, the younger the better.

I used to be able to squat my body weight and do several pull ups in a row. I don't think that's out of my reach now, if I decide to work towards it, but I suspect not many women starting body building in their 70s end up doing unassisted pull ups.

Excited to be corrected!

in reply to Subtle_badger

Well let’s be clear. My mum is not doing pull ups or body building! She’s building core for a serious back problem & has made good progress. Obviously the earlier the better, I just wanted to encourage you....

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to

I was trying to indicate that I am beyond your elderly mother's experience (which is great, no judgement!)

Putting me in the same basket as your elderly mum feels reductionistic in the extreme, especially after I have told you what I used to do, and believed I might do again.

in reply to Subtle_badger

Oh badger I am sorry. Really I was just trying to say that if my ancient mother can build muscle into her mid 70s, then how much more you could achieve given all you have achieved before. Maybe give people the benefit of the doubt a bit more & don’t come out fighting every 24 hours. I won’t comment on your posts anymore as I obviously irritate you. All the best.

Letsbegin profile image
Letsbegin in reply to

PLEASE, some of us may be in our 70's but that is NOT ancient. Wait until you are this age and see if you like it. I bet your Mum doesn't like being called ancient. It sounds like she is doing really well and would appreciate some kindness.

in reply to Letsbegin

Oh dear. I really had not to upset everyone here. I am obviously not good at expressing myself online. Not everyone in their 70s is ancient. I had not meant to imply that but I obviously did and I am sorry. My mother is a particularly ancient late 70s for health reasons. I would never say that to her. I am actually very kind to her and I support all her efforts and I am very proud of them. I think perhaps I will step away from HU, as though I had found being here helpful, obviously other people do not find me helpful. Bye everyone.

in reply to

Well, I have found you to be very helpful, and I'm sorry this thread seems to have caused some friction. I thank you for all your advice and support.

Letsbegin profile image
Letsbegin in reply to

Hello, please please do not leave the group. You are finding it helpful so please stay and continue. I just expressed my thoughts because I am in my 70's with several health issues, and yet I try to remain positive and young at heart so I would hate to think that I was being described that way by any one....even if I were 90 I still wouldn't like it. I just automatically leapt to your mum's defence. Getting older is tough and losing weight is tough at any age. For the past 3 years I have not wanted to lose weight because of having to deal with serious health issues that I now feel that I have under control. The new information about raised cholestrol and blood pressure has motivated me to embark on a calorie reduced intake in an effort to improve my health. I wish you all the best, and thank you for replying. Please stay.

in reply to Letsbegin

Thank you. I am a bit appalled that I have offended 2 people in a short time & need to think a lot more carefully about what I type. I’ll be back in a bit. I think it’s fantastic anyone at any stage wants to improve their health and find it very sad that my mother in law and father think they are too old to bother. A GP friend sees lots of older unhealthy patients all year round and is very discouraged, until the flu jab clinics when the surgery is full of octogenarians she never sees all year - who are busily walking their dogs, body boarding on their summer holidays , digging the garden and having a whale of a time in their retirement. That’s what I’d like to be. All the best with your weight loss and health journey.

roshough profile image
roshough in reply to

Hi there, I'm not into the 70s yet but nearly there, and I think the ageing process...to do it gracefully is to keep as active as one can but not necessarily expect to do what you did before. I, partly due to my excessive exercise earlier on, have now had both knees and both shoulders replaced. Rock climbing and mountaineering as before is out of the question without wrecking the new joints and returning to the pain I had before....BUT. I am SO grateful that i can walk, and doing this every day also stops the back pain getting worse. Clearly losing weight is a really important factor in doing these things, but there is no doubt in my mind that building muscles as we age is essential for balance, and preventing worse things later on!

BridgeGirl profile image
BridgeGirlAdministrator2 stone in reply to Letsbegin

Hello, Letsbegin, and welcome to the forum :)

There are members of all ages here so don't be put off. We can care about our health and wellbeing at any age. Sometimes, things can be worded a little clumsily, but I'm sure they're not meant to offend.

I see from your profile that you are at risk of Type 2 diabetes. Overweight and diabetes are symptoms of a faulty metabolism and to fix both you need to be eating the correct foods, not just "cutting back". Here's some reading that I hope you'll find helpful. The first one is from a GP who has had great success with his patients in reversing Type 2 diabetes

dietdoctor.com/wp-content/u...

healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

phcuk.org/wp-content/upload...

This is the first of a series of short videos you might find interesting

youtu.be/h0zD1gj0pXk

A good way of getting involved with the forum is by joining a weekly weigh-in team and using the Daily Diary. You'll find them, and everything to help you get the best out of it, in our Pinned Posts healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

All the best :)

Letsbegin profile image
Letsbegin in reply to BridgeGirl

Dear Bridge Girl, thank you so much for your links. I have read a few but intend to read them again tomorrow. I'm sure I will find these articles extremely helpful. Thank you.

BridgeGirl profile image
BridgeGirlAdministrator2 stone in reply to Letsbegin

You're welcome :)

Letsbegin profile image
Letsbegin in reply to BridgeGirl

Hello BridgeGirl, I agree that we need to eat wisely. I buy and eat lots of veggies and fruit, most of it organic. I have started to count calories and note the importance of reducing carbs in my situation. I do consider that I do already eat healthily but must confess that I find the Christmas period very difficult. This time period is about a month long when I fall into the habit of eating up left overs, and things I don't normally eat all year round like mince pies and other so called Christmas treats which contain far too much sugar. I will post again when I have been weighed after a week's effort without consuming these "treats". I have also cut down on my portions: for example 30g of oats instead of 40g without any added sweetener; my favourite being agave syrup. I add pumpkin seeds and linseeds and raspberries. Yummy, and I don't notice the changes much.

BridgeGirl profile image
BridgeGirlAdministrator2 stone in reply to Letsbegin

I think we all have our regular patterns thrown by Christmas.

You may like this post where members share ideas about cutting down on eating between meals - the term "junk" to be taken broadly healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to

Ah, I missed this last night.

I was enjoying our burgeoning "friendship". Sorry I made you feel under fire - again. That's sort of a sorry-not-sorry, but I do mean it. I am not apologising for my feelings, but apologising for my response. I do have a hair trigger sometimes.

I hope we can reach a detente and keep chivvying each other on.

Tiggerr profile image
Tiggerr

We're all here to improve (or even maintain). You don't have to be incredibly overweight to join in. Never met anyone here who isn't understanding of that.

At the same time, there's no pressure to do anything you're not comfortable with :)

in reply to Tiggerr

It's just someone here responded to someone else (not on weigh in posts, on a general post) and said something like, 'I wish I was that weight' when the poster clearly wanted to lose. It wasn't meant badly, but I am conscious that some people find it trying when those less heavy talk about weight loss. It's why I can join in diet conversations with colleagues, because they all say, 'you don't need to lose any' and 'I wish I was your size'. So I don't talk about it or post on FB like others do. I like it here, I'm loving the daily diary, etc, but I just don't want to upset anyone...

Tiggerr profile image
Tiggerr in reply to

You'll never upset anyone (unless they're weirdos ;) ) by saying who you are and what you're striving to achieve.

I suspect that person you quoted hadn't taken umbrage and probably didn't mean to cause anyone any upset.

Some people do get upset more readily and it's a proven fact that the written word is harder to interpret correctly than face to face, where we also take into account intonation, facial and body expression etc...

You'll be fine. Like I say, do what you're comfortable with.

Subtle_badger profile image
Subtle_badger in reply to

I saw that comment, and was going to mention it. It was clearly being supportive, but misfired. The person didn't post their height, so it's possible they were obese, and even if they aren't, it wasn't helpful. And that sort of thing will happen again, because new people won't realise it's wrong.

I suggest you don't post your weight, as weightloss is not your goal. It's likely you will lose some weight, and if you do, don't be afraid to share that if you want to. Waist measurement is the best thing for you to share.

KT2345 profile image
KT2345 in reply to

Maybe just put details of your week and your waist measurement each week. Not the actual weight. If it makes you feel more comfortable. Since joining I’ve got the impression it’s more about what’s right for you to post on here not about what you have to post. Make it fit what you want it to to help your motivation and it will help you then. Don’t be put off 😀

IndigoBlue61 profile image
IndigoBlue61

I agree with all that’s been said, it’s just as hard to lose one stone as it is to lose 3 . . . In fact it’s often more difficult ☹️ Trust me, no-one is judging you

in reply to IndigoBlue61

So true!!!

Sewnknit profile image
SewnknitRestart April 2024

I think, in a nutshell, you have hit the BMI nail on the head.

It is so generic as to be rather meaningless for those of us outside the average build.

I'm very broad and heavy, and tall with it. I'll never feel or look healthy in my so called ideal range. I have lost weight, but there is still a big wodge rond my middle, usually hidden so people think I've lost enough.

You do you.

And good luck!!

Eleanorba profile image
EleanorbaMaintainer in reply to Sewnknit

You do You, love that!

in reply to Eleanorba

me too

Eleanorba profile image
EleanorbaMaintainer

Same here! I’m in the healthy BMI and though I’m the opposite shape to you (narrow waist, heavy hips and thighs) I like to be in the middle of the healthy range not at the top of it. This is a.because I’m vain! And b.because I’ve got a dodgy knee and when I get to a certain weight the pain just switches on even though that’s still within a healthy BMI. So everyone’s healthy and happy is different!

Salcheq profile image
Salcheq1kg in reply to Eleanorba

Wow, you've just described me! No dodgy knee though, but other health conditions!

Eleanorba profile image
EleanorbaMaintainer

Also wanted to add that there’s something healthy about the friendliness of this site that enables me to chat about food in a normalising, unobsessive way - which is good for me as my relationship with eating hasn’t always been mentally healthy. So I came in to Maintain and will keep coming in even when I’m back in maintenance.

in reply to Eleanorba

Yeah, I agree, so far loving the site but not been here long and still thinking about reactions in the outside world...

Salcheq profile image
Salcheq1kg

Hi Hidden , your post really struck a chord with me. Back in June 2017 I was in a very negative spiral with food and couldn't stop putting on weight. I desperately wanted a support group to help me, but the one time I went to a well known group, the glares from other people was unbearable. I am average height, and at my heaviest I have only ever just tipped from healthy BMI to overweight by the tiniest of fraction...

... but, if you saw my ankles and wrists and hand and foot size, you would see that I have a tiny frame. I am too heavy for me, personally. But I don't look overweight and never really have. But I feel very wrong and unhealthy when I am at the top of the BMI. I don't want to be at the bottom, but when I lost weight before, I found a sweet spot, where I felt just right - I was a size 12 on bottom and 10 on top, and felt incredibly healthy.

So, by a stroke of luck and desperate google searching for a free, anonymous weigh in, I found this wonderful forum. I am very much a regular, I lost 10kg and put most of it back on again, I almost never lose weight at the moment, and I yo yo ridiculously. I drop out of weigh ins and reappear shamefully weeks later with gains.

With all of that, I have never, once in 2 and a half years had any negative comments from my weigh in (shout out to all you Sunday Slimmers). There are people on this forum who have lost the equivalent of my whole body weight and still I have received nothing but empathy, support, encouragement, praise, helpfulness and friendship. I know that there are people who would love to be my weight and probably don't know why I worry, but they are still kind and supportive, and understand that for me it is about managing my relationship with food as well as being at a size where I feel well and happy.

So, in summary, give it a go! You will undoubtably be most welcome.

in reply to Salcheq

Thank you so much. So far, I'm loving this site, it's great to finally be able to talk about weight instead of having to hide dieting from friends because they'll go on about why I don't have to, and how much more they weigh than me, etc.

PandQs profile image
PandQsMaintainer3st 7lbs in reply to

Hi Sherlock, it is Sunday today, if you haven’t yet chosen a regular day to weigh in, no time like the present! Like Salcheq, I used to be a regular on Sunday Slimmers because Sunday is the day that I have most time to interact with others. You won’t be judged, just supported. I needed to lose weight from everywhere, but particularly around midriff as I’d burst at the seams into a hernia. I’ve found that LCHF (low carb high fat) was very effective in getting rid of the internal fat that was so dangerous around my middle. GP tells me hernia no longer a problem!

in reply to PandQs

Thank you. I'm about to do just that!

Letsbegin profile image
Letsbegin in reply to PandQs

Well done PandQs. How wonderful to improve your health. I hope to do the same by following your example.

PandQs profile image
PandQsMaintainer3st 7lbs in reply to Letsbegin

Good luck Letsbegin - best thing I’ve done in years is to switch to LCHF way of thinking. It might not suit everyone, but not having to count calories and loving cream in my coffee have made it my best option.

Letsbegin profile image
Letsbegin in reply to PandQs

Well, I'm probably not doing it properly as I am still counting calories. I find that fatty things cause me to have acid reflux, but I'm more aware of cutting down on the carbs.

PandQs profile image
PandQsMaintainer3st 7lbs in reply to Letsbegin

I wouldn’t be able to advise on right or wrong ways, I only know what worked for me :) I stopped bothering to count calories after reading about “all calories are not equal” and then shifted my thought process to trying to only eat things that required minimal insulin response. They’re are others here who could give you more expert guidance.

Letsbegin profile image
Letsbegin in reply to PandQs

All calories are not equal. Is that a book or a slogan do you know. I have not read this. I know about empty calories which are from junk foods which have no nutritional value. Is this concept along the same lines?

Diane2 profile image
Diane2 in reply to Letsbegin

Here you go..on subject of " is a calorie a calorie?"

blog.myfitnesspal.com/ask-t...

elliebath profile image
elliebathMaintainer in reply to Salcheq

Well said 😊

Be-yourself profile image
Be-yourselfNursing Mum 2024

We all have our own goals! If I weigh myself I am a healthy weight....but I have no muscle whatsoever and it's all fat and wobbly.

For some reason I had it in my head that once I got to my goal weight I would have a figure like a model, lol. It's very far off!!!

Now looking into maybe doing some strength training to get me some muscle!!

Letsbegin profile image
Letsbegin in reply to Be-yourself

Good luck Be-yourself. x

Nobody will take offence if you weigh less than them and want to loose weight. We all have independent issues with our bodies and their is no shame in wanting to lose weight even if it is just a few pounds or a few stone. Honestly dont let it bother you x

19sunflower profile image
19sunflower

Hi Sherlock 20

I've only been here since late November but have encountered nothing else exceot generosity of spirit, kindness, support and friendliness. I honestly believe that people are mindful of each individual's own goals and are there to encourage and support irrespective of however much or little each person is aiming to lose. I imagine most of us just love the variety of topics, the insight, the great recipes, the banter.. It's another dimension to all our busy and varied lives.. Bring it on 👍 A great place where you can truly be yourself xx

Jsc3 profile image
Jsc3

Please do not worry about your size shape or how you think you look . everyone is there for the same reason.this is how used to look at the times I went ww .as the only male there .hope this helps

IndigoBlue61 profile image
IndigoBlue61 in reply to Jsc3

Hello and welcome Jsc3 😊

If you haven’t already then please read the Pinned Posts here healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... Please read it carefully so you can find all the information you need to find your way around.

Best wishes

Indigo 😊

gman1961 profile image
gman1961Restart April 2024

Nobody would think that on here ,we are all in this together.

All shapes and sizes welcome on here.

Good luck .

Gary

elliebath profile image
elliebathMaintainer

Just be yourself. The people on here come in all shapes and sizes. Some have a lot to lose, but there are also quite a few who are just 7-8 lbs away from the size that is right for them. We all are aiming for our personal "happy place" within the healthy BMI range . For some people that is top of the range, for others near the lower end. Even the long term maintainers on here have to tackle extra pounds every so often, not cuz we're classed as overweight , but because we don't want to regain!!!

Thanks for all your comments. I have decided to post weight and inches on Sunday weigh-in, because I do want to lose pounds AND inches. I trust this site, and having it up there will be motivational. I really appreciate all your advice!

Craftyperson profile image
Craftyperson

No one will judge you and there's no real ideal weight and heart Foundation say waist size is more important you can be a supposedly healthy weight but waist measurement be too much so if you want to loose inches then that's you and go for it you will get support no matter what. When I've not been loosing weight I've done my measurements and they're going down nicely. Good luck

ChubbieChops profile image
ChubbieChopsVisitor

I'm in a similar situation to you. I'm 5'3.5" and have got down to 10st. 3lbs. Yesterday my BMI got down to 25 but I still look chubby so would like to lose more though I don't know how much. I'm guessing you aren't following a LCHF diet. I started one just before Christmas and I have now lost half a stone. Managed to stick to it quite well over Christmas when I would normally have put on half a stone so I am chuffed to bits. And this is the crucial point - that half stone has gone mostly from my middle. I feel amazing, no bloating, no hunger and no cravings. Maybe check out the LCHF forum?

in reply to ChubbieChops

I am trying the LCHF thing at the moment. Well done on your loss.

ChubbieChops profile image
ChubbieChopsVisitor in reply to

Thank you, I hope it works for you too :)

Hi Sherlock20,

We’re not here to judge, you have a valid reason for losing weight, but remember the body decides where the fat comes off Often not where we would like it to. We come in a variety of shapes and sizes, Continue to eat healthily, exercise, check your posture. Do things that you enjoy 😉

in reply to

It's bound to come off from there eventually, since there's not much else for it to come from. I'm not kidding when I say it is where all my weight goes. It's just where I store fat, unfortunately. In the most unhealthy possible place.

You may also like...

Community first timer looking to join a weekly weigh in

anything and I'm hoping that joining here will help give me some focus and motivation. I'm...

Weigh in week two 😒

surprised I haven't lost weight. However since I started I have lost an inch off my waist so I am...

Week 2 weigh in

work from last week. However, the scales stayed the same. So, no weight lost, but none gained. I...

Anyone else get down weighing themselves more than once a week?

decided to jump on the scales 2 full days before weigh in day and at night, my weekly weigh in is...

Week six weigh in