Help required

[Phocly2]

Hi all

I'm currently over eight stone overweight and hide away in my flat when I'm not at work so no one can see me.

I think about food all the time and arrange anything I do around food. I need help any suggestions, the doctors just gave me a card for lifestyle for you and sent me on my way.

My BMI is 39 and I am classed as obese I recognise now I need mental help but have no idea where to start

Thanks in advance for any help

[moreless Administrator 7 stone]

Hi and welcome, Phocly

I can empathise with the way that you feel, as I was the same, before I came here and my BMI was 44!

By logging on regularly and joining everything, you can start to focus on something other than food, without the embarrassment factor. Here you're in disguise and can be open and honest with people that are in exactly the same boat.

I would advise that you lock all your posts, so that they won't be shared on Facebook, Twitter, or anywhere else on the internet.

To make navigating the forum easier, we've put all the information you'll need in a newbie pack and here's the link

healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

Please take the time to read it carefully, so that you're able to enjoy everything that we have on offer.

We ask that you also read this important information about internet privacy and security.

healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

Wishing you all the best

[Barcud 48kg]

Hi Phocly2 , you've certainly made a huge step in the right direction by coming here, so many of us have been there, 10 weeks ago I weighed over 21stone and today at the Monday Mass Movers went into the 18 stones and although overwhelmed at times by the taskand I know it's going to be a journey with ups and downs with the support here and joining in I know I can do it.

Firstly remember to make sure you eat enough (of the right things) and you should not feel hungry, being hungry or not eating enough is what causes the failure on most weight loss programmes. It will also help you not to think about food all the time. The Daily diary is a great forum to post your daily menu plan and by doing that it helps you stick with it.

By joining in on one of the days to record your weight then returning each week to record your losses (being positive there) it's faceless/anonymous and really motivating. Don't look at the end loss, set yourself small achievable goals which will really help your self confidence, I lost a sack of dog food (12kg) and am now aiming for my 15kg badge.

You can do this, onwards and downwards. Good luck

[BridgeGirl Administrator 2 stone in reply to Barcud]

Congratulations on getting into the 18s - fantastic progress

[Barcud 48kg in reply to BridgeGirl]

Thank-you!

[PippiRuns 6kg Restart Nov 2023 in reply to Barcud]

Inspiring👏👏

[mx5mada]

Phocly2 it no way to live! First you need to get some health for your mental health issues! It will help if you do this first! There is lots of support for all conditions on here! I am newly out of obese into just overweight and it’s been a challenge! Don’t hide seek help

[Hidden in reply to mx5mada]

No it's no way to live is it? That's no life staying in all the time so no one can see you just some miserable old existence!

What about setting small challenges to start with and work up to bigger ones and be open with your gp about this as if they don't know they can't do anything for you.

Best of luck!

[Hidden]

welcome on board Phocly2 If I were you I would go back to the doctors and tell them exactly what you are going though. You have to be honest and tell them what you have just written here. Your mental health must be taken seriously but they cannot help if they they don’t know what you are actually going through. I’m sure that once you get you mental health under control your physical health will follow. Good luck 😊

[Phocly2]

Wow thankyou everyone for your support

Jyst what i needed today xx

[Barcud 48kg in reply to Phocly2]

Hope you are finding your way around and can see a way forward, we are all here for the same reason ....because we have not been kind to our bodies or ourselves but are now turning that around, it's a journey but one we can make with support. Onwards and downwards.

[Whin]

I agree joining this forum is a really good idea Phocly2, and that it would be a good idea to try to get more help with mental health issues, as I'm guessing from my own experience they will be interrelated. I recognise a lot of what you say about hiding away and obsessing about food. It has taken me a long time to realise that habits really can be broken... I'm finding coming here is helping, and hope you do too. Good luck!! X

[IvanTheHorrible Maintainer]

It might all seem a bit dark right now, but well done for taking control of your life.

Personally I'm not convinced people should be pointed in the direction of "mental help" when they are facing real, practical problems. Your embarrassment is a completely understandable reaction to something you are unhappy about. When the practical issue is resolved, you will naturally regain your mojo.

Your obsession with food is most likely more organic than psychological. It's a very common symptom (although in your case it seems quite extreme) caused by an incorrect diet. Once adjusted in the right direction (a bit of willpower is required for a matter of weeks, at the outside) your appetite will right itself.

Realistically, you need a professional diet consultant to help you with this, but the chances of the NHS providing that help are vanishingly small. If you can afford it, I would recommend going private. It's not complicated, but you'll need a bit of hand-holding during the first few days.

If you don't want to go that route, or find the cost prohibitive, I can PM you with a book that might be of use to you? I'll also ask moreless if she can give you some personal advice.