Breaking the serie of bad days

Hi,

How are you all?

Last days were for me very hard. My diet suffered significantly. I "lost" a friend, a girl with who I chated a lot (via net, as I'm in UK and she is in Poland). She decided that she doesn't feel our relation any more. She wishes me good luck and such. This was the only person I was talking to regularly, apart from my partner who is on business trip at the moment. This turned me to comfort eating.

Moreover, my GP suggested that I should try FODMAP diet for my probable IBS (under diagnosis). The diet is very restricted in phase 1 (3-8 weeks), and I am very bad with restrictions for longer than 7-14 days. And I have nobody to talk to about it. My partner can listen, but it will not happen earlier than in 4-5 days at best.

I'm in emotional hole, no self-esteem, no motivation, no willpower.

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11 Replies

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  • Good evening IgaT good to hear from you even though you are not in the best place. So sorry to hear that your friend is not communicating any more and you are feeling alone. That is the beauty of the form, you are never really alone, always someone to chat to.

    One of my son's has tomeat FODMAP and it has made a huge difference to him. I look at the things he can eat rather than what he can't eat and just cook from those ingredients. I would say it is worth a try. You may feel so much better that it is worth sticking to.

    Take care, hope you partner is returning soon

  • Thank you Cealss!

    For a good word and for being here.

  • Welcome!! We'll be here for you. I don't have anyone either and my husband is away for several weeks at a time for work too. This forum has given me lots of care and support and lots of people to talk to.

  • I am aware that this forum is brilliant. I think my inconsistency is what kills most of my relations, with forum friends as well. There are times, I'm writing several times per day and then there are times I'm writing once a week or I am silent for couple of weeks.

    But this is who I am, like ocean waves. I've learnt that this is ok (after multiple attempts to change it), I accept it, but apparently there are only couple of people who understand it.

  • Hi and welcome IgaT

    There is always someone on this forum to talk to, so please don't feel that you are on your own.

  • Thank you

  • Hi IgaT Sorry to hear that you are having a rough time of things. Some people are very good at ending relationships, shaking the dust from their feet and never looking back. They aren't the sort of people I'd want in my life.

    I agree with all the above comments, there seems to be a well of practical and emotional support on this forum. It's the first time I've heard of your new recommended eating plan and yet, already, lovely Ceals has personal experience of it.

    I was given some good advice recently, by an old Australian friend. We were chatting weekly online, while he worked thousands of miles from the nearest 'civilisation' in the middle of the Australian desert, on an aboriginal 'dry' settlement. I didn't think he would cope with the rigours of life there, as he's the original Bon Viveur. But he thrived and did good work there.

    He recommended the work of a Greek Stoic philosopher called Epictetus.

    I was not convinced, thinking it couldn't be relevant to modern life but agreed to read The Enchiridion. I was going through a difficult time, frustrated and trying to understand the behaviour of other people. I was prepared to try anything.

    Epictetus really gets under your skin. The philosophy is deceptively simple, but effective. The tactics are helpful in facing the daily stress of life.

    A few of my favourite quotes...

    " Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle. Somethings are within your control, somethings are not."

    "The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you, whose presence calls forth your best."

    "Other people's views and troubles can be contagious. Don't sabotage yourself by unwittingly adopting negative, unproductive attitudes through your associations with others."

    "If you hear that someone is speaking ill of you, instead of trying to defend yourself you should say: "He obviously does not know me very well, since there are so many other faults he could have mentioned"

    i now know that it's useless to try & second guess other people. They don't think like I do. It's pointless to fret about stuff I can't change, I try and focus on the stuff I can.

    There is probably a lot of information and possible support groups for FODMAP online. Chatting to people who know what pitfalls to avoid, know what you are going through, could be invaluable and lead to new uplifting friendships?

    Your health is your main priority, I hope things go well.

  • Love the quotes Pippapoodletail and think the are spot on. Haven't come across the philosopher you mentioned but will look him up.

    Thank you

  • Thank you for your lon message. I try to live according to this philosophy altough my partner call it just common sense ;) But there are days or situations that you know it's pointless to worry or stress, but emotions are boiling just underneath the surface.

    I'm just looking into this FODMAP thing and I told at the reception that I want to talk to my GP, as moat webpages says I should be referred to dietitian to make sure I have all nutrition despite the restrictions. I can handle the major nutrients and macros, but I'm not sure about all those microelements that are less known or thought of.

  • There is an IBS forum on health unlocked IgaT and a lot of people there are doing FODMAP diet might be worth a look. I'm lucky I don't have to follow the full diet as I'm ok with wheat and dairy, it's the alliums, cruciferous veg and beans I can't have. You might find after the initial phase there are some things you can re-introduce. Good luck 😀

  • Thank you, I'll look into it. It is still very new recommendation for me, so I'm on the stage of gathering information and slowly changing content of my fridge and pantry.

    I know I will be able to re-introduce probably or hopefully quite a lot ingredients ;)

    I am not even sure how long the phase one should last. It says 3 to 8 weeks which is quite a big range. I'll check the IBS forum, thanks.

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