Please help! I'm stuck in self destruct mode :-(

Ive been counting calories for 4 weeks and i average around 1600-1800 per day. I have only lost 2lbs and then I gained even though I've stuck to correct amount of calories for my bmi. I then had a gain and then I went off the rails. I get stuck in a rut of what I can take for lunches (I'm on the road and don't bring money as i can't trust myself to not buy bad stuff so bring stuff with me. I'm also struggling with meals and planning them, I have 2 teenagers at home and food is the same every week. I've tried finding recipes on here but I can't find them. Please help, I'm feeling so fed up and stuck in a vicious self destruct cycle and I really want to lose weight and feel healthy and have more energy. I have a personal trainer 2 x pw and I do HIIT with her and I've recently started the couch to 5k so I'm not just sitting around eating. What am I doing wrong? My clothes feel a bit looser but the scales are going up and this is upsetting me. Any advice welcome, thank you x


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22 Replies

  • If you are using an app this does not give you extra pages you can use apparently so it would be better to use this page on the internet. Then you find recipes on the Topics section which you will find on the right hand side under the posts if using computer/iPad but it will be at the bottom if using a mobile. The thing to click on says Recipes/Meals/Snacks and you can also look on and join the Daily Diary page also in the Topics section as this gives you information on what other people on here have been eating to help them with losing weight. I find nearly every time I lose more than 1lbs I tend to put weight on or maintain on the following week. I wouldn't worry about it too much as it will come off and won't take too long. Good luck with your next week. Hope you find these topics easy.

  • Ahh! I went through that a few years ago I joined WW for the first time and after weeks my weight was either the same or a pound or two up. What I did do differently I realised aerobics class twice per week and kick-boxing not forgetting the dancing. I was building muscle mass and that weighs more than the equivalent size to fat.

    Meal wise as I've now joined SW they say you can eat as much free food as you like e.g veg certain fruits rice and pasta. So today it's lots of pasta for lunch with tuna in brine not oil. I may put a little bit of pesto with the pasta. But that is a syn so I need to be careful with that.

    Good luck and don't despair your doing great.

  • If your clothes are looser that is telling you you are doing something right. I always think that what my clothes are telling me is so much more important that the number on the scales.

    With the exercise you are doing you will be getting fitter, eating healthily will be helping from the inside out.

    I rarely lose more than half a pound a week and just have to accept that is what my body does. After all I put my weight on very, very gradually, you probably did the same.

    Think about what you are eating. Do you cook from ingredients of use processed foods.

    Stick with it, give your body a chance. Join in the Daily Diary, you get so many ideas of what to cook and everyone is so supportive. I learn loads.

    Make food your friend not your enemy.

    Good luck

  • I guess I'm impatient and I used to lose weight quiet well but I'm 47 now and guess its going slow up. I dont cook much due to lack of time and only stick to slow cooker meals always the same old stuff. I usually just have a processed calorie controlled microwave meal with lots of veg

  • Someone on here gave me a very sensible piece of advice, Ptfeclare . If you keep doing the same old same old, you will get the same old result!

    Apart from that, don't use your age as an excuse!!!😂. You will find people on here almost twice your age successfully losing weight on the 12 week plan! And if you are really serious about losing weight, and I know you are if you have a personal trainer, then find time to cook proper food for yourself and your family. Personally I think it could be more successful than a PT: you can't outrun a bad diet, as they say. There are people on here with disabilities which mean they can't exercise, but they are still able to lose weight because they have cut portion sizes and are counting calories.

    Hope I don't sound too bossy, but I want you to succeed, because I know from experience that what I have said works, not just for me, but for hundreds of people on here. 😘

  • Great post Trimmerteacher and I agree with everything you've said. Losing weight is something like 80% diet and only 20% exercise. I have only succeeded in losing as much weight as I have by varying what I do, and trying new recipes and flavours. I cannot imagine eating the same thing week after week - BUT I have friends who do eat the same thing day in and day out; their excuse is that they don't enjoy cooking! I think it's often that people are afraid to try and cook - they worry it won't turn out right or whatever.... but practice makes perfect and you can only get better at cooking by keep doing it!

  • So true Pineapple27 !

  • I was so terrible cook, oh my. But practice made me better. Now, I experiment with food :) not too often, as not experiments are good or even edible :P but I found few recipies that I love, and I slowly increase my favourite meal list ;)

  • Awww, IgaT that sounds perfect! No one is born with a skill to cook good food. I have always enjoyed it and would often watch my Mum making food (she's French!) so some things like making a sauce or putting certain flavour combinations together I learnt from a very young age.... but there is always more to learn! I'm glad that you are increasing your favourite meal list!

  • I still don't like to cook, so my favourites tends to be easy and fast meals ;) But the variety of spices and different products is increasing :D

  • Hi Clare,

    Despair not! Breathe, regroup and lets start again!

    - Are you following the NHS 12 week programme at the moment? This is what a lot of people follow to begin with on here. The first step is finding out what your calorie allowance is on the NHS BMI calorie calculator (I googled it to find it in my first week on here) Is that how you figured out your cal allowance? If so are you going to the top end or bottom end of your allowance? I would suggest somewhere in the top/middle range is a good start.

    -Once you have your calorie per day allowance figured out on the calculator (often higher than you think) I would suggest using myfitnesspal app to start tracking all your cals. Are you using this?

    - Next, I would suggest looking at your macros. Myfitnesspal will give a basic idea of how much carb to protein to fat you are eating. A lot of people feel (and studies show) that the recipe for success lies in getting these macros in the right order for your body. For a huge lot of people that means going against old ways of thinking and making fat (heatlhy ones preferably!) a large portion of their daily food intake. Then protein. And then lower carbs (preferably made of wholegrains, veg, nuts, high fibre foods etc)

    - Look at how honest and accountable you are in your records. If you are letting a little handful of peanuts here and a wee bite of your OH's magnum there slide and go unrecorded, you can bet your bottom dollar these things will add up and hamper your progress.

    - Next on the checklist - are you drinking enough water? Are you getting enough quality sleep. Both these things can actually alter the way you absorb and process food, particularly how your blood sugar is regulated. And this is key to health and slimness. Truly this is key.

    - NEXT - Is there perhaps an underlying medical issue that you could address? Thyroid is the obvious one, hormonal imbalance in general and then of course inflammation disorders including food intolerances.

    I cant be sure what stage you are along these ideas, or whether youve ticked all these boxes. But if not, these are maybe ideas to help you back to a positive road?

  • Thanks for your reply. I have mfp and nhs bmi said I should have between 1800 & 2100 which I think is quite high so I'm on 1600 to 1800. I must admit that I will have a packet of crisps here and there and chocolate and the odd cider which I log in my calories. Water I have a litre per day and sleep about 7hrs per night. Only issue which has been picked up is that I'm very low on vitamin d so I'm taking 1 oil capsule per week for 8 weeks, this may be a bit towards it but I don't think it's the main issue.

  • I strongly suggest eating at least 1800 Ptfeclare as eating too little is detrimental to fat loss. And it's FAT you want to lose not 'weight' if that make sense, and it's physically impossible to lose fat quickly.

    Eat too low and your body goes into famine mode and clings to fat, it's finding the right calorie amount that is key

  • 1 litre of water a day is not very much at all, particularly if you are exercising,

  • Do yo drink herbal teas, green teas, apart from water? If not, you should increase water / fluid consumption.

  • HappyBeee , great post and great advice. Many I'd suggest myself ;)

    I can also suggest at least looking at

    Which show kcal allowence taking into consideration your activity level and body fat % (which you can check on some home scales).

  • I would also add: if you have recently upped your exercise game considerably, it is possible that you will gain a couple of pounds in increased water retention, as the muscles hydrate more (not that this is a reason to cut back on your wtaer intake. Quite the reverse. the more water you drink the better, and water weight isn't actual weight.) This has been seen quite often n studies of weight loss and exercise increase that water retention obscures fat loss.

    This is also why some people imagine they are increasing muscle mass after starting running etc.

  • Try the Change4Life Smart Recipes app for lots of calorie counted delicious, easy family meals. I also love the Hairy Dieters cook books, again easy, doable recipes, food the family will love, no weird ingredients and all calorie counted.

  • I can see you're frustrated clare! There may be a few issues at play. I'd double or triple your water intake for sure, and try getting 8 or 8.5 hrs sleep from an early time like 10. Seems harsh but it makes a difference. If you're recording every calorie, drinking 2 to 3 litres water, eating a good balance of nutrients with higher fats, exercising and sleeping properly and STILL not losing anything then I'd see the doctor maybe?

    Why don't you join the daily diary and record all your food daily, and see if anyone has some pointers or ideas!

    It's unbelievably usefull!

  • I think we are all in the same boat but keep at it - im on my 6th week and ive lost inches my clothes are loose but ive managed to loose 2 lbs... but ive maintained which is great as its not going up!!!! best of luck

  • Hi i dropped 2 dress sizes through purely working out cardio and resistance pilates and yoga not on the same day! However the scales didnt show much difference if you are out on the road there are healthy choices to be made additionally try planning your meals in advance and maybe prep meals when you have time your personal trainer should have some nutritional advice for you too hope that helps and good luck

  • Hi,

    You're doing great work! You're doing everything all right. You just need to be patient (something that I struggle with as well). The results will come!

    First of all the weight will go up and fown naturally due to water retention, monthly changes, and many more. You can see my post from 2 weeks ago how much my weight was jumping during only 7 days.

    There is one very important thing​ for you to know: MUSCLES WEIGH MORE THAN FAT. So if you feel your cloths are getting more loose, that's good. Take photos of yourself, measure with centimetre, and compare those! You can alsp do the fit test every month and compare results, and you will see how much you are changing towards fit and healthy. The change in pounds will come, don't worry.

    Good luck!

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