How do I stop feeling like this? :(

My height is 170cm and my weight is 78kg. However, my weight should be 72kg according to the BMI calculator. After realizing, I'm 6kg above my average weight I look at myself in the mirror so disgusted from my body! When I'm outside I compare myself to other people, how slim they are compared to me :( I'm on a diet now attempting to lose weight but I just can't help it, I hate my body so much.

How can I learn to love my body again? Did anyone experience the same feelings about their body?


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7 Replies

  • I suspect we've all been in your shoes, Hopefully, but I want you to look at yourself differently.

    If you looked at a friend, or family member, who was 6kg overweight, would you be disgusted by them? Would you hate them?

    From another perspective, when I started on my journey, I was 57kg overweight and I'm still 9.5kg overweight, I'd love to be in your shoes and wish I had your slimmer body.

    There's always more than one way to look at things and you are no less a person, figuratively speaking, that anyone else and you do not deserve to be treated less respectively.

    Be proud of who you are and what you're doing, a number on the scales doesn't define you as a person :)

  • Thank you for your encouraging words moreless.

    I must say well done for your determination and for not giving up! Answering your question course, not I would never hate a family member or a friend for being overweight, despite all the flaws they may have my love to them would never change :)

    I don't know the issue is in me I guess :( Like sometimes when I dress, something that is a bit tight and not loose enough I feel self-conscious all day about myself. So all the clothes I pick now are loose so it doesn't show off my body. I honestly hate the way I'm behaving, my friends always tell me my body is great especially my height. Despite all the positive comments I get, I still hate my body. I can not wait to lose weight to feel self-confident all over again.

  • Be very careful, Hopefully, because if you have such a distorted self-image, losing the weight may not help that.

    You need to learn to love yourself for who you are and how you are. Do it now, before you waste a lot of years, like I did. You are wonderful, I guarantee it :)

  • That is such sound advise moreless.

    Hopefully2 it's hard but you have to love yourself. Don't be disgusted by your body. The BMI is only an average weight guide. You have to find what feels good for you!

    Our bodies are amazing pieces of machinery maybe you could also go to see your doctor who will give you the correct weight for you.

    You will get lots of support on here so don't stress and good luck with your journey 👍🏻😊

  • Even though the BMI tool is widely used it does not work for everybody perfectly. I once had a medical, a full blown cardiac, respiratory & physical medical for a job application. Even though my weight put me squarely in obese range for BMI, the Doctor refused to put that description in my report because she said the BMI did not work for every body shape. As I was so broad as well as tall the results were skewed. If I tried to get down to my ideal weight as per the BMI I would most likely end up looking emaciated.

    There are far too many possibilities available from genetics for one system to work, some people are naturally skinny, others curvy, some have narrow builds, some are broad, some short, some tall. The BMI works off your height, weight and age, no mention of width.

    Try not to obsess about the exact number, it's a guide that works for most people but not all, think of it as a ballpark figure.

  • I think many of us have experienced some degree of self-hatred because we are/were overweight. When I started here, I was 5-6 kg above my healthy BMI just like you and not at all happy with my body. Mainly because it couldn't do the things I wanted it to do but also for the way I looked.

    I just want you to know that it can be done. Take one step at the time as recommended by the NHS 12 week plan and you will soon see changes.

    Keep posting and we will support you on your journey.

  • I think you shouldn't worry too much about the bmi calculator as it gives the average not taking into account bone mass, skeletal structure etc. I spoke to two separate doctors about bmi and they both said they did not focus on this unless someone is obviously overweight. My own doctor is dieting but knows there is no way he can match the bmi target because he is so tall and broad. He is aiming to lose four stone not six as recommended by bmi. Your weight sounds fine and you must try not to worry about bmi. I think I would be more worried about how down you are feeling you sound very low. Can you chat to anyone about your negative body image?

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