can't even look in the mirror

im at my biggest

i can't stay motivated

nothing fits me

and i feel ugly

i used to be so good to myself, go to the gym, go for walks but over last year ive piled it on and i just want to lose the weight

im a fussy eater and im so easily tempted by chocolate and sweets and never find the motivation to go to the gym

i was doing well a few months ago using this site but now i just have lost hope to lose it

i know i want to and need to, i just cant seem to find that spark below that gives me the get up and go to walk run go to the gym and try new foods,

im desperate


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12 Replies

  • Take a big deep breath Andrew and let's take this step by step.

    First of all, you're not ugly and a number on the scales doesn't define you as a person.

    Secondly, to get the most out of this forum/community, you need to be active on it, so I suggest you get yourself straight over to EllaMidland's weigh-in thread and log your weight today. You will then be accountable to more people than just you.

    Next, sign up for TheJuggler's awesome April challenge, soon to become BadlyDrawnBadger's Marvellous May challenge, so that you're accountable for your exercise efforts.

    Then, go and join HealthyTanja's Happiness Challenge as I think you need some emotional support, to get you through this hiccup.

    When you've done all of that, reacquaint yourself with all the information that's on offer here, by starting with the Welcome Newbie thread and working your way through the topics.

    We're all in this together, my friend and together we will be successful. I'll look forward to catching up with you all over the forum, very soon.

    Onwards and downwards! :)

  • I agree exaxtly with what moreless is saying, I've not always kept to the rules.

    I'm not always ruled by the scales and sometimes its how light you feel in your head and you know in your heart you will have gained so whats the point of worrying and being governed by what is juat a number

    HealthyTanja and all on her challenge have helped me such a lot and when I get emotionaly down and I have through personal stuff (I am a classic comfort eater ) they help me feel stronger more positive and then grateful for what I do have and that in turn helps you to get back to a healthier way of living , if I hadn't kept logging in sure I would of also avoided that miror, part of her challenge has been to also record what has made your blood pump which is great for endomorphins happy hormone we can make by just even going on a gentle walk or doing some gardening ☺

    We can do this there is a lot of help on this forum x

  • Hi Andrew, well you've made a good start by acknowledging how you feel and by coming here. 🙂

    You're not ugly of course, but that's how being overweight makes you feel. I stopped wanting to socialise and even began walking my dog very early to avoid people. I felt terrible and the more I felt that way, the more ice cream and biscuits I mindlessly ate. It all felt hopeless and pointless, so I just indulged myself, which was not being kind to myself at all.

    Motivation comes from within and that spark you say you can't find is right there waiting for ignition. So, no time like the present hey 😀

    Be good to yourself, go for a walk in a lovely place, breathe in nature, borrow a bike and have fun. Eat less today and it will fall into place. Make a written menu plan and Bob's your uncle 👍

    You should see my favourite jacket now! It's so big on me that the sleeves are way too long. And I'm only in my tenth week. Onwards and downwards. Let's hear your plan and what you intend to do, you'll get lots of help here. ⭐️

  • Hi Andrew,

    Loads for you to digest that moreless has posted.

    I normally babble on inanely when I post... instead, click the link on moreless's name in this post and read the caption at the top of her profile page. I've been using it for the last 3 months or so as my "fire down below" :).

    Good luck!

  • Just start with one small change and congratulate yourself for it. Keep on with it then add another. Seriously the only person who can make the change is you. I believe in the power of small changes. For me it's added up to four and a half stone weight loss. You can do it. You just need to. Start today and ditch the chocolate. Good luck!

  • You would be welcome to join today's weighin. We are a nice bunch.

    Here is the link:

  • Your not alone feeling as you do ... we all have the battle with ourselves to lose the weight .... I try to put a positive spin on things to help me get motivated making small goals and when I achieve it .... however long it may take I give myself a treat .... not food related but new shoes etc your choice... it helps to think well I weigh this now but I won't in a few weeks 😊

  • Thank you all for your kind words.

    I've joined the posts that many of you have suggested.

    Everyone is so positive and helps me so much.

    This weekend I have a much needed break to the coast. Lots of walking will do me good and get me started.

    I will try remain positive and when feeling down will use the site here for positive information.

    I know there is a long road ahead.

    I can do it.

  • I am lucky enough to live by coast enjoy your walking x

  • You certainly can do it. Don't look at the whole picture, set mini goals.

  • Have a good time, life's definitely for enjoying.

    I've stayed linked into this forum since I joined, whether happy or down. Reading people's posts, even if you don't get involved can be really inspirational and a continual motivator.

    That long road is really just a series of short paths. There is no rush to get to the end and no problem if you have a pause. You'll get there.

  • You sound so sad but please stay with it - there have been many days when I have gone to work then stayed in as soon as I have got back hiding my fat self away. I cannot count the number of parties and meet ups I have declined. Take each day as it come and do try and get out for a little walk. I started to nod greetings to people etc people I do not know - and guess what no one said F O speaking to me you fat old cow - people actually nodded back and now say hello!!! Take care

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