Evening Caz as you are aware I can't post this on your thread as it doesn't allow you to post a picture.
Bereavement is a process which we all go through. Any loss can create the same feelings as a bereavement does when a loved one dies. However loss of role- loss of finance- loss of job etc we also follow a bereavment process. There is lots of different theories of how this affects us.
Worden's model of grief attached explains the process. Intetestingly there is no time frame for completion for bereavement .
I can assure you your grief and the feelings you have are very normal. For a full version of Worden's grief model have a look on line. It's very interesting makes sense and I hope provides you with some comfort.
It's hard very hard. I know when I have had my animals put to sleep due to old age and the complications that go hand in hand with age I have felt a traitor. However deep down inside I realised their time had come and it would have been cruel to keep them going -for me.
I have cried and cried until I was physically sick - I understand how you feel.
You are probably in stage 2 however you can also move back to 1 many times before you move to stage 3.
I hope this helps Caz - give it time. Things are still very raw. It will get easier. Molly brought you joy and love she came to you for a reason 😐