I did it

Hi Everyone,

For months I have been having trouble with my Sister and her husband. Trouble I mean nasty attacks verbally like

Your loosing too much weight, what was wrong with you before (size 18), you need help mentally your addicted to the gym, your anorexic. Not nicely said either. I remained quiet and refused to get into an arguement.

After that they constantly say 'going to the gym again' bet your not eating properly, and more snide comments. At one point I pulled out my phone pulled up myfitnesspal and showed them various days menu.

Well it started to really pull me down to the point where I did not want to talk to them and questioning my weightloss progress. Then I thought no it their problem not mind. Last night I put and end well hopefully, I decided to ring them and explained why I'am on this journey, why their comments did not help, if they did not like it to then keep their comments to themselves infact said ' your either with me or against me, with me ok if nit keeps your nasty comments to themsleves, I would never tell you your obese or how to live my life don't on mine. To which I then ended our conversation. Well lets see what happens next but at least I have said my peace. Feel better for it.

Is today more acceptable to be obese than it is to be thin?

Good luck to all

Wendy

9 Replies

oldest • newest

  • People get jealous. They also see a change in you for the better and you are moving out of THEIR comfort zone. They will do their best to keep you in that place. Last time I lost weigt in was accused of being anorexic and apparently I would now be after other people's husbands.

    Pathetic, the lot of them. You do whats right for you, they will just have to wear it😊

  • It could be that your success at losing weight is drawing attention to their own inability to take control and get fit, so they are trying to "trip you up" so that they won't feel so bad about not doing it too!

    Alternatively, they might actually be concerned that you are going to extremes, and that you have become too obsessed...? It takes time for people to accept drastic changes in others - folks like what they are used to, and it can be a bit of a shock for them to have to accept a person they thought of as a bit of a cuddly softie to suddenly see them in a new light; assertive, confident and in control of their lives.

    Give them time, they will get used to the new you. Accept that it is their problem (as you have said), and stay cheerful, friendly but make some new friends too, so then their opinions won't matter so much.

  • I also got told

    Neglecting husband and my 2 adult children let alone the housework. My gym classes are in the evening after everyone is fed, watered and all housework is done. Silly how people feel free to say the worse about you but can't be vice versa.

  • Yup! That's true !! People that pride themselves on being 'forthright' and 'honest' but can't take it back!! Really gets my goat!! Grrr 😡

  • There's a world of difference between "forthright and honest" and just plain mean and nasty!

    If you're genuinely concerned about somebody you can find sensitive and caring ways to discuss your concerns with them.

    Gottodothis , I think your husband and adult children are plenty old enough to not only take care of themselves but also to be helpful around the house! I think your family need to get over themselves and stop pushing their insecurities onto you.

    You're doing fantastic to take charge of your life to be more healthy. I for one admire what you're doing and know you'll succeed in the end! :)

  • Well done you. Standing up to bullying behaviour usually stops it in my experience. Sibling relations can be very weird. My sister scarcely talks to me now because I wouldn't let her make my family problems (breast cancer and a trans gender child) all about her and let her post all about them on social media.

    Ha ha is that ironic? But I do see posting anonymously in a closed forum as a bit different. (Fleur is not my earth name).

  • Are they overweight themselves, by any chance? People generally don't like change, and seeing someone else achieve something (like weight loss) which perhaps they have tried at and failed, or can't motivate themselves to do, just makes them more aware of their own shortcomings.

    This is probably what's behind the nasty comments - best just to feel sorry for them, and keep going on your regime.

  • You're doing great. It's not acceptable to be obese, it's just more common than it used to be for very many reasons. You're on the right track and you don't need negativity from those close to you. Believe in your yourself. You're worth it. Don't let them get you down and you'll soon be the weight you want.

    Ginnybw

  • Focus on your own health and wellbeing.

    Maybe steer clear of people who are not supporting you for a while and get yourself surrounded by positive people.

    You are doing well, keep going!

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