I read an article ages ago which I can no longer find which talked about the weird things that happen as we get bigger and I know when I read it, it felt great to have someone talk about the kinds of weird issues being over weight confronts us with.
Sorry if some of these are a little graphic! Would love to hear about some of your niggles as well
I AM FOREVER PULLING UP MY PANTS
I seem to spend much of my day dragging my pants back up to my non existent waistline!
I don't know how many I will be walking somewhere with my hands full and start to think "Oh no, they are on the slide!"
Funny thing is occasionally someone will ask "Are you losing weight" as I hitch up my pants for the 42nd time that day and I just have to say sigh and mumble "noooo"
WHO NEEDS TO GO TO THE GYM TO STRETCH
This is rather graphic but recently as I have gained weight I am finding wiping my rear is starting to require a stretch so I can reach around.
It's amazing what positions you can achieve when you need to!
THE CAR OOOOFFF
As I struggle my way out of my rather low car I can be heard letting the good old "oooffff" sound as I try to gracefully drag myself up without looking like I need a crane to exit the car!
I've also noticed the seatbelt is starting to get much shorter for some reason?
Seriously who came up with this whole laces concept on shoes!
I fling my foot up onto my knee but I am at a point now where I have to strain to keep it there AND get the shoe on AND then tie the lace.
And then exhale and start again on the other foot.
WHY ARE MY TOENAILS ON MY TOES
I remember when as a kid I could pull my toes up to my mouth and gnaw my toenails off! Oh shuttup I know you did it too
These days I have to hold every muscle in place to reach down with the clippers and create some kind of clip that does not look like a rabid chihuahua came along and chewed on them for awhile.
God definitely created a design flaw there - your toe nails should be much higher up your leg!
I really should go to the dentist but since I last visited I have put on 20 kg's and I remember it was hard struggling up to swish around the water and spit it out BEFORE the weight came on.
I keep telling myself I'll go when I lose some weight...so weird but it's just stuck in my head for some reason.
Same with seeing friends from years ago - I avoid it at all costs because I have put on so much weight since I last saw them!
Thing is I know if the roles were reversed I know I wouldn't care of they gained weight, I'd just be happy to see them...
A thorough investigation must be done of any chair or bench I plan to sit on in public.
There has been more than one occasion when as a friend sits down on some tiny little chair I suddenly feel the need to stand up, stretch my legs, get some air - avoid sitting on that tiny little chair at all costs!
THE HEALTHY FOOD CONUNDRUM
If you looked at my breakfast or lunch or day time snacks you could be forgiven for thinking I am the healthiest eater in the world.
Yesterday I had hi fibre rolled oats with a little peanut butter for breakfast, watermelon as a snack, chicken salad for lunch, a pear for afternoon tea...and then it all falls apart at dinner or soon after.
The chocolate and chips suddenly appear and if they are not there every cell in my body is suddenly chanting the chocolate chant until I give in and go to the market.
But if you looked at what I eat during the day? Picture of health!
FLYING IS FOR THE RICH
I no longer can face trying to squeeze into an economy seat so my only way to fly is in business.
Unfortunately my family forgot to become independently wealthy before I was born so flying is a rarity!
I'm sure there is more that will come to me but I hope you can identify with some of these