Feeling deflated☹️

I joined my local NHS My Weight Matters group 4 weeks ago. 1st week lost 4lb, 2nd week lost 1.5lb, this week I only lost 1lb. Been tracking all foods, keeping an eye on portion sizes etc. I went out Friday night and had 1 & 1/2 bottles of wine. This is the first drink I've had since Christmas ! And one evening after a very emotionally draining day, I had a treat size bag of Cadburys buttons (a rarity) but when I met up with a consultant at the group , she made out that I'm not "serious" about the programme! I certainly am , and I don't go out drinking every weekend , this was the first time since Xmas! A small packet of chocolate - which I recorded, and had no other treats for two days after. Just feels like unless I give up alcohol permanently forever , and any treats forever, I can't expect to loose weight. I came away quite deflated. Even on slimming world, treats weren't "banned" but you had to make sacrifices to have them. Sorry for the rant ! Just made me wonder if I should continue. The other consultants have been great, and said treats are OK in moderation, but you have to adjust your calorie intake after to even it out. Anyone else having a deflated time ? X

6 Replies

  • Hi zetecs 😀 I can't believe that you were made to feel that way by the people who are meant to be supporting you through your weight loss/life change 😔 you have defiantly come to the right forum for support, information, motivation and (to be honest) a bit of common decency !! Are you following the nhs12wk plan? If not highly recommended. Your weight loss is allways high to start as you loose water and then slows down to a very steady 1-2lb a wk. the slower it comes of the more likely it stays off 😀 never deprive yourself of a little (or big) glass of wine and chocs as long as it's in moderation and is within your calorie allowance. Good luck. Claire x

  • Hi,

    I'm not surprised you feel deflated but please don't let this silly person get you down and push you off the wagon!

    I'm not sure how much you have to lose but if ultimately this is going to lead to a lifestyle change then there will be times when you eat and drink a little too much.

    Losing 1lb during week 3 if perfectly acceptable and doesn't suggest that you are not taking it seriously. As Claire said a 1 - 2lb loss a week is a good steady loss so what you should be aiming for.

    Keep up the good work & ignore the negative comments by someone who really ought to know better!

  • Hi Zetecs. Please don't give up just because of one unsupportive consultant. I let myself have a treat a couple of times a week. I allow for them in my calorie allowance. I think it is good to allow yourself something nice otherwise it would be boring and I might want to give up. I think your weight loss so far is great. I have lost 17lbs now and some weeks I lost 2lbs some 1lb but as long as I was going in a downwards direction I think it is better to lose the weight slowly. I did only lose half a pound one week and I was a bit disappointed but someone on this forum said if you imagine half a pound of butter it is actually quite a bit. So I felt a bit better then I lost a pound and a half the following week. So hope you can keep plodding on and bit by bit you will get there. 😊

  • What did the person actually say? Are you sure that it wasn't more a projection of your own feelings, because she didn't tell you it was all fine? (I'm not saying she wasn't truly unhelpful and discouraging... it definitely sounds as though she wasn't listening properly to you and hadn't taken on board that you'd not had any alcohol since Christmas - just that sometimes when you unpick, something rather different happened)

    It sounds as though you are fixated on the results (the 'reward')... not surprising of course, we are in it for results, and you started strongly... more strongly that was likely to continue like that (I had four weeks with no change at all) and your intake sounds to be vulnerable to mood, and your thought processes tending to catastrophize "I'll never be able to drink if I want to lose weight" The chocolate buttons and a glass or two of wine really are no biggie (although some wine glasses can be a bit too big), but a bottle and a half of wine? That is not a 'treat'. What kind of 'friends' were you with who let that happen? Something worse than just not losing any weight might have happened.

    It sounds as though you feel really cross about the reception you feel you got from this woman but worried that she might be 'right'. Can I suggest some sort of exercise session by way of 'revenge' which will help lift your mood as well as contributing towards your goals? Sustainable weight loss is a long term endeavour and learning to cope with times you haven't furthered your goals is an important part of the process (as is acquiring strategies which help you avoid taking in more calories than you really want to)

    I have found it helpful to shift my perceptions of what a 'treat' is. There's a big fixation on 'treats' which are food/alcohol and not particularly healthy foods. They don't have to be banned but if there's still that attitude there, it leaves you more vulnerable to down times undermining your progress. A bunch of tulips, a punnet of blueberries, a long phone call with an old friend you've not spoken to in ages?

    My other suggestion is sticking to a standard sized wine glass. We have home made pizza most weekends and I do enjoy a glass of red wine with it. So I have gone back to the less elegant 'official' sized wine glass, I pour it out in the kitchen and leave the bottle there. And some weeks I deliberately don't have one so that pizza doesn't always mean wine so I don't feel I am missing out when I don't have wine. It's not as aesthetically pleasing but the weight loss is!

  • And you didn't even head for the chippie! Could you, perhaps alternate your wine with something sugar free like Diet Pepsi or Coke next time? And start with that so you're not knocking back the first glass because you are thirsty. I think you did quite well because you know how much you had. So well done there. If you can suspend your anger, next time she says something that hits you on the raw, and ask her what alternatives you could have looked at. You never know, she might have some really great ideas, or maybe she hasn't. Might be fun finding out. You do need some strategies for nights out. But it is up to you whether you use them on any particular occasion. As far as I'm concerned a lb is a good loss on a week when you had what sounds like a really good night out. So I would have felt I had gotten away with that one!

  • You have done so well 6.5 lb in a month is fantastic . I am over the moon when I loose 1 lb. . Think what that looks like in the butter aisle!

    We are all her to loose weight and change our eating habits , but we all have a life as well , and sometimes a mini bag of chocolate buttons is needed to make the world go round

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