Help! I am feeling like I have failed :(

I have been feeling quite pleased with myself for sticking with my plan to lose weight and get fit. I realised today that when I posted a message last (4 weeks ago) I was saying I wanted to try to lose 14lb in 7 weeks. I have only lost 5 despite working really hard. I am sticking with my diet and going to the gym 5 times a week. I have lost 2 stone 9.2lb now but it is coming off so slowly.  I am eating approx 1350 cals per day which is on the low side of what is recommended. I am not going to give up but the realisation that I will not achieve my goal by the time I go on holiday in July is making me feel really miserable. Short of eating a ridiculously low amount I don't know what to do.  Is it because I am now attempting to lose weight that has been with me for some time (I think it may be claiming squatters rights!) I am generally a really positive person but not at the moment :(


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17 Replies

  • Sounds like you're doing great to me, I think we'd all like it to come off a bit (well, lot) faster, but I find that the more I lose, the slower it gets.....  be pleased with what you've achieved and stick with it - you'll be glad I'm sure.

  • Hi. Thanks and good luck on your weight loss journey.

  • You can try calorie cycling , where you eat more calories for a couple of days then back to the plan. Worked a treat for me! 

  • Thanks. I have tried that earlier on and it did work. Unfortunately it doesn't seem to work as well now :(

  • You certainly have NOT failed harobed! You've lost 2st 9.2lbs, which is phenomenal! If you hadn't been eating healthily and exercising, you would still be at your original weight, or heavier! 

    It's always good to give ourselves goals, to keep motivated, but don't be depressed if you don't achieve the number you set, be proud for trying your hardest :)

    Have you taken your measurements, or tried on something that used to be too small? It may be that you've toned up and have shrunk the inches, rather than losing the pounds.

    Weight loss always slows down, the nearer you get to your target weight, but as long as you can still see a downward trend on the scales, you have nothing to worry about :)

    Just a word of warning, don't think that eating too few calories will make the weight loss quicker, because often, the reverse is true. Check your calorie allowance on the BMI calculator again, with the amount of exercise you're doing and see what it's recommending now. It may be that you actually need to increase what you're eating.

    Another tip, is to mix up the type of exercise you're doing. Our bodies very quickly get used to similar workouts, it's always useful to try something different. Strength and weights are good things to add to your routine.

    Hope this has the desired effect for you :)

    Onwards and downwards, losers are always winners :)

  • Thanks moreless.. I am checking the NHS site for my calorie intake.I've mixed up daily intake so my body doesn't get use to my daily intake. I am fitting into clothes that didn't fit and I am measuring upper arms, waist and thighs which are all reducing which is great. I am swimming 70 Lengths 3 times a week, aqua gym class, body balance (yoga, pilates & tai chi). I am using treadmill, ski cross trainer, rowing machine and several resistance and weight machines which I am really enjoying. As my weight loss has slowed down I have upped the exercise. I am pleased with my progress - I just think my weight should be reducing a bit faster. Thanks for you help and advice, I really appreciate it.

  • How close are you to "normal" weight? The closer you get the harder it becomes. Plus your body gets used to all the exercise and adapts. Have you tried reducing your carbs, or intermittent fasting? That can give your metabolism a kick up the ****

  • Hi. My bmi is 28 and I have 1 stone 3  lb to be in the healthy weight category. I have mixed up calorie intake and try to make sure I keep carb intake low. I do a mixture of exercise Cardio, resistance training, pilates yoga so I think I am doing a bit of everything on a weekly basis.

  • I guess 14lb in 7 weeks is achievable but 2lb a week every week I feel is quite a hard goal. You have lost so much already and I think it does slow down a little when you are nearly at target weight. Please don't think you have failed - sticking to the diet and going to the gym 5 times a week is certainly putting the effort in.  You are only a couple of pounds out and have another 3 weeks to go so you could lose potentially another 6lbs. If you are a few pounds off your goal I don't think you should worry as you will probably have lost over 3 stone by then and that is certainly an achievement to be celebrated. (Hope I have done the calculations correctly!) The suggestions from the other replies sound like good advice and maybe give them a go to see if you can get rid of those squatters!!! :)

  • Thanks very much. I am going to keep at it. I think it is just going to take longer than I had hoped.

  • I know its frustrating but you can only try your best and I am sure you will enjoy your holiday either way :)

  • Hello harobed 

    I am totally with you on this, so I am trying really hard not to think or focus on the end goal 😕 

    I am similar to you (my BMI is 29 after losing just over two stone). everyone is telling me how great I look etc but I am still fat and need to lose another two stone 😕 

    However, this is a permanent lifestyle change, I eat 1400-1500 calories because I love my food and enjoy treats. But if I lose a kg a month this time next year I will be 12 kg lighter 😊 

    The real battle is keeping off what I have lost already. This is the longest I have ever stuck to a plan, and I really hope this is a permanent solution to a lifetime of obesity. 

    Sorry I don't have any advice for you but just want to wish you well, you have achieved so much, all the evidence suggests rapid weight loss is unsustainable, slow and steady wins the day 😊

    Very best wishes

  • Hi Anna61. Thanks for your support. Of course you are right losing weight gradually is definitely best in terms of keeping it off and it gives your skin a chance to tighten as you go (although mine needs to catch up a bit :(!) 

    Like you I want to lose another 2 stone which will put my bmi in the middle of healthy. When I started my journey at the end of November my bmi was 35, which having spent most of my life well within a healthy bmi came as a massive shock - I will never shy away from the scales again! 

    I was hoping to have reached my goal when I go on holiday with my mum and twin sister in July but I will adjust my end date to Christmas. It doesn't really matter how long it takes so long as I get there.

    It is so nice to have others to share with and support on our journey. I will look out for you to hear your progress and best of luck.


  • I will follow you also Debbie 😊 

  • Hi. Thanks very much. Your advice is appreciated and very helpful.

  • Why feel miserable when you are doing such a good job?  You have lost over 2 stone 9 lb , loads of our nation will have put more than that on during the same time ! Celebrate success. You deserve too 

  • Hello Mollydex. Thank you.

    I am feeling much better this week because I have achieved 2 things. I managed to wear a lovely pair of size 10 tailored trousers and lost 2lb this week :-) 

    I hope everyone else on this site find it as helpful as I do. The support given by people who have the same goals is really great.  When you are feeling low or have a problem somebody will always help.

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