Struggling

I need to lose 12 stone. I know I am a food addict. My weight has shot up after getting health problems from being overweight. I have arthritis in my spine and can hardly walk. The doctors told me the pain would lessen if I lost weight. Recently I have started waking up in the night and eating. I am at my wits end. I am going to print off the 12 week plan. Any advise would be helpful

Thanks

28 Replies

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  • Hi there! This forum is great, keep coming here regularly and I am sure it will help you. There are lots of people who are at various stages of their journey and they are full of advice and support, just keep posting and commenting. Some folk are hilariously funny too lol!

    I found the forum about 6 weeks ago. I used the NHS BMI calculator and it said I needed to lose 10 stone to be mid range healthy weight, which was a heck of a shock. I did a lot of soul searching before I started eating more healthily. I watched quite a few programmes about obese people and their struggles. I came away from it finally admitting to myself that I had to stop what I was doing or my son might find me dead in my bed one morning. That plus I didn't want to reach the stage where my family had to become my carers, help me wash, dress etc, because I was too fat to do it. I figured I was only a stone or two away from that stage and it would go on easily if I kept eating that way.

    There were other factors too over the last year or two, but I was in such a rut of depression that I wasn't mentally strong enough to pull myself out of it at the time. Pain can grind you down, I know. Like you, I also have arthritis in my spine. I had a slipped disc which had me housebound for quite a while but luckily it reabsorbed. Not before I had been referred to a surgeon though, which was another wake up call. I was lucky that it did reabsorb. Lately I've been having problems with my leg, which enjoys swelling up like a balloon as the day goes on. I have seen 3 different doctors about it. That was another wake up call when I had injections in my stomach over a weekend until they could fit me in for a scan to check for blood clots! Luckily they found no blood clot. I saw a pattern emerging there...I'd had a lot of luck so far, but eventually your luck will run out and there will be no turning back.

    Honestly, just admitting to myself that I was killing myself and the thought of how much it would hurt my loved ones was enough for me to become determined to change. I want to see my son grow up and maybe get married and have children, I don't want to die. It's that simple. I had very harsh words with myself, I needed to admit the reality and severity of the situation.

    Anywayyyy....at the end of week 5 I hit the one stone loss mark. I can't exercise at the moment (leg and back), so it has all been done through diet. I plan to get lighter then hopefully the exercise will follow, starting with walking and see how it goes.

    I have every faith in you, you CAN do this and we will back you all the way. You may need to face reality like I did, I shed a few tears, and then realised feeling sorry for myself wasn't going to get the job done, dusted myself off and put the "worry" energy into "doing" energy. I had to get myself to a place where I was able to think straight, I was so overwhelmed at first that I couldn't work out where to start. Now I calorie count literally everything that goes into my mouth and keep a food diary every day, the NHS calorie counter is great. It keeps me aware of what I'm eating. The NHS BMI calc will tell you what calories you can eat for your height/weight, and if you are like me, I think you will be surprised at what you are "allowed" to consume. I am tall and heavy, I can eat between 1900-2500 cals per day, approx. Since I changed what I eat, I don't think I have managed 2500 on any day throughout the whole 5 weeks. If you eat healthier, you fill yourself up - I found I couldn't manage to eat any more some days, I was stuffed! More often than not, I can't actually make the 1900 cals per day either. Then, on a day I have a roast dinner, or maybe a "full English" style dinner (not fried tho!), I will go a bit over, so it balances itself up during the week.

    I'm aware that I am waffling on a LOT here so I will shut up now! If you want any help or examples of what I'm eating, please do drop me a line. I wish you all the very best on your journey, we are all here for you.

  • Thank you so much for your kind words. It helps to know someone else has gone through a similar situation and is now doing something about it.

    Thanks

  • No problem, I know what it's like when they tell you that you need to lose weight...talk about stating the obvious! If it was that simple I'd have already done it lol! It's much more of a psychological thing for me. I had pain, got down, comfort ate...repeated the cycle until I got to where I am now. And when you're in that cycle it is so hard to get out of. I can relate to how you feel being in a very similar position myself. I'm cheering you on...if I lose a bit more weight I'll get some pom-poms out and make up a cheerleader chant eh? Hmm, or maybe not...I'll spare the world that nightmare lol!

  • hi there don't think it can't be done it can if you really want to lose weight, i used to enjoy my food until one day in 2008 when i nearly was 28 stone now i'm 21 stone and losing the weight still if you put your mind to it you will do it take care bigalan

  • Hi Acceptance15,

    Welcome to the forum, and sorry to hear you've got some health problems from being overweight. It must be really tough to have your mobility problems, but it's good that your doctors have told you that the pain will lessen if you lose weight.

    It must be hard when you're feeling sleep-deprived though.

    I'm glad you've found the NHS 12 week plan, and your decision to print it off will make it easier to refer to and keep to hand. I would recommend using an app - to help you log your food and drink intake etc, and one like Myfitnesspal is easy to use and free.

    I also find that for me, pre-planning really helps. Making sure I know what I'm going to eat later in the day, and trying to stick by that. It doesn't always work, as I discovered today when I came home from a lunch-time shop with a small pot of clotted cream and a fruit scone in my bag!!! How did that get in there, I asked myself...?! But I will ensure that I don't go overboard, and will treat it as a mid week treat. It is a very very tiny pot of clotted cream, the smallest one I've ever seen, and I am planning to share it with my husband later, so it should be relatively few calories between us. (Sorry, I realise I'm feeling guilty sharing this information, which is why I'm ending up 'justifying myself' - I am laughing at myself now...)

    There is a regular Monday weigh-in club post, which I post just before 7am, so if you fancy joining us, you would be very welcome. Anyone is welcome, but I am also aware that group weigh-ins aren't everyone's cup of tea - so it's just an option. Some people like to post their own weigh-ins or progress reports, and that is really inspiring reading too.

    I really hope you sleep better tonight, and that you have a good week ahead.

    Lowcal :-)

  • Thanks for your kind words. I have a myfitness pal account I need to start using it again

  • Well done for fristly taking a step to sort your food addiction! It's hard as with other addictions u still need to eat food to live unlike smoking etc

    and super congrats on your weight loss! It's fantastic to hear!

    Have u tried just doing stretches at home? I do yoga at home as I have a bad ankle and I'm not ready to exercise in front of people yet

    Good luck and I hope u keep recording food even if u cheat

    You can do it! It just takes a while

    X

  • Good point...have you seen a physio at all? They can give you safe exercises to do for your condition. The word "exercise" always sounds hard to me but it isn't...mine can be done on the bed. It's more about strengthening and mobilizing (sorry if you've heard all this from the GP/physio already). Here are a couple of links...don't do it if it hurts! I can't do the one where you have to kneel at the moment because of my leg and the pressure on my knees is just too great. Always stick to what you are able to do pain free, never push it, little and often is key!

    nhs.uk/Video/Pages/sciatica...

    nhs.uk/Livewell/Backpain/Pa...

  • Thanks I'm waiting for a physio appointment on the nhs, tho I'm going to have to call and chase them up tomorrow as I've been out of action for over 5 months now!

    Yeah I just do a little bit at time and when it hurts I know not to do that stretch

  • Thanks I will take a look and give it a try. The irony is that I love working out. It really made me feel good. I used to work out six days a week and was my happiest when I was doing it.

  • Welcome to the forum :) it is a fab non judgmental place full of people who know exactly how you feel. Have a good read around the site - posts from today posts from two years ago - they're all helpful.

    Don't hold the total weight you need to lose over your own head, instead say my first goal is to lose a stone, that way it will seem more achievable.

    If you fall down get up again and come on here and tell us all about it before getting back in the saddle and moving on up!

    Good luck and keep posting :)

    Kate x

  • Thanks Kate

  • I ignored doctors advice for years. I finished up with sleep apnea, bad knees, sciatica and minor heart issues.

    15 months ago I decided enough was enough and that was the secret. I decided to do it and for once really meant it. That's what yo have to do. Don't do into it half heartedly but decide that from now on you are changing your life.

    I changed my diet from day one eating far less, no takeaways, no alcohol, reduced massively my carb intake so no chips, pasta, potatoes other than very occasionally and only small portions. Don't have things like biscuits and cakes in the house.

    Start cooking which gives you greater control to have healthy ingredients. Plenty of veg and chicken or fish. Avoid processed foods and avoid sugar like the plague.

    I started at over 21 stones and am now just under 13 stones so it can be done.

    Yes I still miss pies, chips and all the bad stuff but you have to be determined and self disciplined.

    As a result of the weight loss my health and fitness is massively improved. No longer have bad knees, sciatica or sleep apnea and have come off some heart medication so losing the weight really does work.

    Don't worry too much about exercising at first. I did nothing other than gradually increasing my walking for the first 6 months and lost loads of weight. Diet really is the key. As you lose weight you will be more able to excercise and get fit.

    It is hard but does get easier with time and results.

    I wish you all the best and if you want to discuss anything then message me.

  • Thank you

  • Hi Andy

    Love your story, really strikes a chord with me as I too have degenerated into the same type of condition you have suffered. I have lost a stone over the pat five weeks and I am focused and enjoying already the journey and the changes. I take great encouragement from you success and see it as an example that I should try to follow.

    Dave

  • Set yourself small goals under xx stone! If you have a bad day move on let it go, learn from it and strengthen your resolve, keep looking around the forum, there will always be someone in your shoes be it start end or anywhere inbetween Good luck!

  • Welcome And good luck. You'll find loads of support here and, as others have said, one step at a time. Remember, the long journey begins with just one step. Calorie count every tiny amount and stick within your recommended range. You will be surprised how the weight falls off. Another tip: imagine each pound as a bag of sugar or block of butter and just watch how these all start to disappear.

    Good luck.

    Primrose 😊

  • Hi Acceptance

    Be a little kind yo yourself. No you don't need to lose 12 stone. Your doctors told you you needed to lose weight, just focus on that. Every stone, in fact every pound you lose will help. Maybe eventually you will lose everything you want to lose, but if you go into the process with such a big and seemingly unattainable target, you are making life difficult for yourself. Set small goals, and pat yourself on the back for every loss however small. Don't beat yourself for the occasional blip or setback, these will also happen. Lose the weight and do it slowly, it is truly the only way to sustain the loss and to train your brain and your body to live life a different way. Good luck and keep us involved along your journey.

    Dave x

  • And be kind to yourself. Do NOT starve yourself. If you do it will be great for a little while and then you will be so fed up, you will give up and pile on more pounds than you lost. So sit down and think about what you are going to do. We are all different and we all approach the need to lose weight differently. Read lots of the posts on here as it will give you ideas and inspire you. You do need to know the calorific values of what you plan to eat - even some healthy options are high calorie e.g. nuts, so you must be careful how many/much you eat. Cook ahead and freeze, so that if you have a day when you can't cook through lack of time or maybe just fed up with the whole weight loss process you can fall back on and not resort to takeaways or bingeing on cakes and biscuits. Be aware you will fall by the wayside on occasion and accept this before you start and just try and be good in the days that follow. My naughty day was yesterday when I had a Chinese, a pudding and a slice of cake. Today I must rein myself in again. For me having the Monday weigh in ahead really helps and the people who comment on my posts help me to continue on my chosen path.

    So good luck and keep in touch.

  • Hi Acceptance15. I started my journey needing to lose 13.5 stone so I know how you feel.

    I have lost 4 stone since Feb so it can be done. I had a lot of bad habits to break.

    I am on holiday at the moment but I will catch up with you when I get back and try to offer you some advice.

    This is a great forum so keep posting etc it will really help.

    Good luck :)

  • Thanks I look forward to talking to you.

  • Hi Acceptance, how have you been getting on so far this week?

    As I said before I too have a lot to lose and whilst it can seem impossible just take it 1lb at a time.

    I started out trying to reduce my evening snacking. I can happily eat very little during the day but just want to eat all evening, so I replaced all the chocolate etc with low cal stuff - sugar free jellies, low fat yoghurts and weightwatchers mini rolls. Once I got used to it I reduced the number of snacks. I now either have some tinned fruit or about 100 cals of chocolate. I try not to eat anything for about 2 hours after my tea and then I have my little treat.

    I have also reduced my portion sizes - it is really interesting to check out correct portion sizes and compare them to what you eat - quite an eye opener. Ok you will go to bed hungry at times but it will pass with the help of lots of water.

    My aim is to be normal - eat like a normal person so eating normal portion sizes is what I want to do. I also want to be able to go out for a nice meal now and again and have the occasional treat.

    I haven't really banned any food just some things are a very occasional treat. Also sometimes I just have a nibble of something - yesterday some brought cake into the office and I had the tiniest bit - just 2 bites. I enjoyed it and knew I wasn't ruining my weight loss. A whole new attitude which still amazes me :)

    I can honestly say that losing weight has been so much easier than I thought it would be, it is just a matter of getting focused - I know, easier said than done!

    Keep checking in and posting on the site and hopefully you will be reporting a loss soon.

    Good luck :)

  • I like how you are doing things. I am also replacing some foods for more healthy options. I am also paying attention to portion sizes.

  • Just take it slow and steady and you will get there. :)

  • Hi there, just wondering how you are getting on? I hope you are feeling as ok as one can in the circumstances. Remember that we are here if you need a chat any time. Take care :-) xx

  • Hi there, thanks for reaching out. I am making small changes but it is amazing how the bad foods calls out to me. I am buying fresh food and eating lots more fruit and veg. I need to spend more time on this forum. I keep thinking I have to do this by myself.

  • Warning: I'm going to sing! "You are not alone....I am here with you...", ok, that's quite enough of that, the neighbourhood cats have formed a backing choir outside my front door! :-D

    Seriously tho, someone was saying recently that weight loss can feel like a lonely journey, especially if no-one around you needs to lose weight. That's why we all come here, everyone understands each other's struggles with food because they have been through/are going through the same thing. Sometimes just having a shout about it helps - have a look around and see how many posts there are about falling off the wagon, we are all human!

    Try to keep in the zone and if you have an off day, just forget it and keep moving forwards. You can't change what's done, but each new day brings a chance to start again, so keep on keepin on, we're all behind you!

  • My doctor me to keep a food diary but also write how I was feeling when I bought certain foods and how it made me feel afterwards. It makes interesting reading and helps you to sort through your emotionally attachment to food and how to explore other methods of coping. The NHS website is a good way to go and I will definitely be planing my meals.

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