Laying it on the line

I truly believe that if you try and find a positive in the most miserable of times, you can overcome almost anything. This has taken me over forty years to hammer into my brain and it is finally embedded. Each day I think of 10 things that I am grateful/happy for, and often surprise even myself with some of the things I come up with. It's an affirmation that will be lifelong, and as in the past and present, I know the future will present me many challenges to find these glimmers of light.

I do not say this lightly as life has thrown me some god-awful curveballs at times. I had a difficult childhood ( to put it mildly), but I survived it. 2 years ago I had major surgery for cancer with the following year seeing me survive 3 pulmonary embolisms, 2 lung collapses and major cardio thoracic surgery. At one point I had around 2 hours left to live, but live I did. Throughout my life I have had many other horrific events and my 19th and 21st birthdays are etched with very sad memories indeed. I am not relating this for sympathy, the opposite in fact. Life experiences can be overcome, and being overweight is one of these challenges that can also be overcome with a positive attitude rather than berating yourself.

I was always around 1 stone underweight until I married at 18, slowly putting on around 1/2 stone each year. The weight wasn't just down to too much calorie intake, a little was down to other factors. The base line though was that I consumed too much. Over the next 24 years I would lose a few pounds here and there, then put them back on with a few more. 5 years ago I divorced and lost 3 stone in 6 weeks in stress, slowly putting my life back together I also started to put those lost pounds back on, fortunately I kept 2 of the 3 stone off and came to my senses 12 weeks ago by joining this forum.

Food has always been a comfort to me, happy- i eat, sad- i eat. From being young and not knowing if I would eat more than a slice of bread and marg that day, to being an adult and hoarding food in fridges, cupboards, freezers... I am well aware of the psychology behind what I have done and still do to an extent. BUT, and it is a HUGE but, I have learnt to be kind to myself and to find the positive, the silver lining in the most unlikely situation. To this end I am winning the battle of the blubber, but I also know that the battle will always have to be fought.

To my fellow posters on this forum, thankyou, you are one and all a daily positive in my battle to melt away this excess weight. Your stories and tips, daft sense of humour of some and sheer grit to succeed yourselves are wonderful. ๐Ÿ˜


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24 Replies

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  • Be Strong Be Happy Thanks for being here!

  • Wow another inspirational post. You are an overcomer and you are winning this fight too. We'll done and keep going. I am cheering you on!

  • I always think that food is the last luxury people give up. Its an everyday way of feeling like you've got 'enough'. But its also tied up with so many things, esp psychological, comfort etc.

    I'm going to try thinking of those ten things tomorrow when I wake up. Honoured to have you here esp all the things you've had happen to you over past few years. Keep being kind and seeing all the silver linings :)

  • Thankyou Ruth. Did you manage to think of 10 positives? It can be quite enlightening and very out of the box sometimes, lol. ๐Ÿ˜Š

  • I only got to five, I remember starting and then getting distracted. But it was still good to try and it wasn't the obvious things I thought it'd be. I'll try again tomorrow :)

  • It can take a whole day for 10 things to pop into your head, for instance by 1pm today I was grateful that the 10 minute downpour of rain came after I had brought all the washing in and just finished mowing the lawn, lol. I was overjoyed that the ยฃ200 pair of Taryn Rose shoes on sale for ยฃ20 because of a tiny mark on the wedge were my size!!! See, it's easy peasy when you get into it.๐Ÿ˜Š

  • Okay, I see now. I totally got caught in that rain riding home from a job in south London today, but I didn't mind, because I've decided at the moment it's a good thing to cycle in the rain, maybe that will change when it becomes cold rain though... I will try the throughout the day method tomorrow. Enjoy your new shoes :)

  • Love this post! Very inspiring to say the least.

  • Thank you, Shellie. You have helped me more than you'll ever know. Going through the adoption process, which is emotional hell. You made me seen that yes I haven't yet adopted a child but I do have so much to be thankful for. Succinctly put things into perspective.


  • Bless you Liz. I hope the end results in your heart being filled with the love of a child. The long process is audios๐Ÿ˜Š I know, but worth every difficult step.

  • Shellie, you are a marvel. Thank you for being here for us all.

  • Ditto hun, the same for me with you and the rest of the fab posters on here โ˜บ๏ธ

  • Hi Shellie,

    Inspirational ๐Ÿ’

    Yes life does throw all kinds at us and while it may take us time to learn,to grow and move on what is most important is when we can be honest with ourselves.

    Be proud of your strength and determination that had got to today, we cannot change our past but can learn from it.

    Stay strong, be happy and live your life the best you can on your terms.


  • You have hit the nail on the head Flossie. What has gone, has gone. The only way it can affect you in the present and future is if you let it. Not always easy to let some things go, but for your own sanity and future enjoyment of life letting go is a must. ๐Ÿ˜Š

  • A big hand for ShellieL. "What doesn't break you, makes you." :D

  • Even broken things mend given time and chance. Life is to be lived well, taking any chance you get to make your heart sing. Hope your week is going well hun. ๐Ÿ˜Š

  • Link directed me to a vintage 'revisited' items website, is that right? Even if it isn't, had a good look anyway - lovely bits n pieces from fashion to household. Love it ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ˜Š

  • Can't post images in replies (shame); link doesn't work now but took me to an image of a Kintsukuroi pottery bowl - a good message: Kintsukuroi: the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery with gold or silver lacquer and understanding that the piece is more beautiful for having been broken.

  • ShellieL you are a true inspiration. I go with everything you have said.

    Woo hoo you're amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

  • Thankyou hun. I'm not amazing though, just try to be kind to myself and others. Even saying good morning to a stranger you pass lifts the moment, truly. ๐Ÿ˜Š

  • I say go girl woo hoo!!!!!!!!!

    Have a great week.

  • What an amazing inspirational post - and I would expect nothing less from the fabulous Shellie.

    Thank you for remind me to be grateful. Its so important to a positive attitude.

    After I read that line I sat here, closed my eyes and came up with 10 reasons to be grateful in about 10 seconds flat.

    Have a great day :)

  • Awww, thanks Dave. I come up with some really daft things to be grateful for sometimes, lol, but I do think of things that can make me quite emotional too. Have a great day hun. ๐Ÿ˜Š

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