Negative thoughts and scale that doesn't go down :-(


What a week, awful

I am on week 6 of NHS weight loss programme and things are not going well

The first 4 weeks were ok and I was losing weight

Then I had birthday parties and things and ended up putting weight on

I have now lost 5 kilos in total and have 6 more to go

But I am starting to realise it won't happen πŸ˜” I find it awfully hard to avoid food, at work there is always cake and biscuits. At home I get stressed about stuff and eat

Yesterday I was doing great, then I had to cycle to a doctors appointment and it ruined everything

To realise how unfit I am, cycling up that hill.... I started crying πŸ˜”

I work so hard. I walk well over 12 km a day, I cycle everyday even if thirty minutes, I do my three runs a week with couch to 5k

And this. Nothing. Not losing any weight because days like yesterday where I ended up eTing too much homemade sushi, drinking too much cava and then was so upset that I ate three penguins :-(


So negative that I can't stick to the programme. Calorie counting is the only thing that works for me but now I can't even stick to that

I feel like a massive failure


24 Replies

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  • Hi I know exactly how you feel. What always works for me is doing what you just did and writing it down and then doing some exercise. Sounds like you do tons already. try stretching or just breathing quietly somewhere You have also come such a long way and its normal to have these big reactions. Even if you have a bad couple of days or months it will happen. Ps try that hill with a really good bike.

  • Thanks for your comment 😊

    I had a good bike and it got stolen πŸ˜” and to be honest, I always wonder if my poor performAnce in due to my new one being cheap and heavy

    This helps ☺️

    I feel so bad about yesterday... Today I must behave and go to the gym and do a run

    But still sad

    Thanks so much for your kind comment 😊

  • Don't be sad. Enjoy the gym and love the run - am v envious. Have a good weekend

  • Thanks

    I working today too so I will try to fit everything

    I would love to enjoy the gym but sadly I have never enjoyed exercise, I hate it but I understand I have to do it

    Have a lovely day and weekend and thanks for your reply :-)


  • You are not a failure - 5 Kg in 5 weeks is awesome! We all have bad days (sometimes weeks) but they key is to remember that they are in the minority now. You have lost weight and you will again, your weight will plateaux from time to time, try to remember that it might not have dropped from last week but it's still lower than a month ago. Positive thoughts aren't normally my strong point either but I read your post and it felt so familiar to me that I had to reply. You can do it. Shake off this week, it happened, never mind. It takes 12 weeks to form a habit so you are half way there don't let the gremlins win! 😊

  • Thanks πŸ˜”

    But in the past two week not only I haven lost but actually gained weight

    I will never lose it

    So upset

  • OK. Well here's another viewpoint. I am where you are. Have lost but starting to put back. Not for any reason other than I've been choosing to eat too much! Today I'm going to go back to healthy eating and I already have my veg out on the counter to make soup. My freezer has the required tuna and my porridge with water beckons. Come with me and we'll pick it back up together.

  • Well said! I've had my 50g of muesli with 25mls of milk( hate milk!) and am off walking to the supermarket to restock the vegetable section of my fridge and buy more fruit.

    Keep it up everyone. A blip of a week is normal - we CAN do this! 😊😊

  • Don't be hard on yourself either gillibrite. If you cut back too far on what your body needs, it will fight you all the way to try and ensure your survival.

    For decades the advice has focussed on low-fat intake because of its calorie density, instead of concentrating on eliminating the foods that stimulate further eating.

  • I think you are amazing! give yourself a well earned pat on the back! your right with what you said "you work so hard" today is a new day! A new fresh start!!! you are already doing everything you can for your weight lose, and everyone of us slips up! keep going don't be down on yourself because beating yourself up won't help you at all it will just make you negative you should be positive you do so well!!! this week will be better ;)

  • Thanks

    But after two weeks now on the scale not going down I went on it this morning and I have put 800 grams

    So I give up

    I will abandon the plan and just eat what I want since I am overweight anyway

    I tried and I failed

    I know I let people down here but I can't keep this fight for nothing

  • Only 800 grams compare that with what you you had lost! It is nothing. Search "Sugar and Weight gain" or any other effect of sugar.

    It will horrify you. Please, please, please do not give up. For the sake of the person you will become if you try again. DONT STOP or we will weep for and with you.

  • ok don't lose heart sometimes when we want something so bad it don't happen. just as an example when a lady wants a baby so bad the couple keep trying and trying that's all the lady can think about but its not happening, the minute they stop trying so hard it happens she gets pregnant! so what im saying is you are getting stressed and putting your body under pressure and you won't lose the weight. try to relax you will lose weight because you have before! Also are you tone up rather than losing weight? You might find that you are losing inches sometimes the scales say more for a while because muscle weighs more than fat! don't give up just relax do what you have been doing it will happen.

  • Thanks for your reply

    I don't think I am toning as my jeans still won't do

    I know this is my fault because sometimes I have eaten more that I should

    I am going to have cake for breakfast, I don't care anymore if I gain a ton, I will accept I am meant to be obese, I have no willpower

    Thanks for all the support, you people are amazing and I wish you the best in your journeys xxxxx

  • take a day off and start again on Sunday or Monday. Maybe you need a brake. take care. Please post in a few days to say how you are doing what ever that my be! people on here care and want to support you! also one more thing, if im right you have only be doing this for 6 weeks! if thats correct your body may just be dealing with all the changes and its all normal. take care

  • Please don't give up. Why not prepare yourself for next week, plan your meals including snacks and start again next week.

    I feel for you I really do, but I dont think that you would have posted on here if you really wanted to give up, so please carry on. Xx

  • You didn't fail; the diet did.

    Any changes you make need to be enjoyable so you can stick with them.

    As you've identified, it doesn't matter how active you are if you take in too much usable energy.

    Start with eating foods that satisfy your appetite, then you can concentrate on controlling your portion sizes.

    It's not about willpower, it's about putting strategies in place, working with your biology, not against it.

  • Don't spoil all your hard work. Eat more if you are really hungry and give yourself a break, but don't press the self destruct button. In a couple of weeks time you will feel ready to cut down again and it would be good for your future self if you are not back to square one. So just relax a bit but don't go overboard!

  • You exercised so much you depleted your energy, you ate rice that stimulated your hunger, followed by alcohol (fermented sugar) that added to your 'munchies', and were so upset you reverted to a quick-fix.

    You could exercise sufficient to improve your fitness, and not so much that you don't recover fully.

    You could balance your diet by eating carbs such as bulgur wheat that provide sustained energy along with a small amount of protein to satiate hunger and some natural fat that provides the mouth-feel and nutrients you need, whilst slowing digestion.

    You could have drinks that don't cause munchies such as milk or water.

    You could change your attitude toward what you consider a treat, recognising that fructose is an addictive substance that works on the pleasure centres of the brain as other addictive substances, developing tolerance, contributing to feeling low if you don't get your fix to bring you up to 'normal' levels. You could eat real foods that satisfy your appetite, that you actually enjoy eating instead.

    You have to want to make changes, and the best way is to make those changes more desirable than what you used to do, just doing one or two at a time until they become the new you.

    There must be something about your old habits that you liked, even if it was just taking away your feeling of withdrawal. The benefit of your new habit must outweigh that, or you won't keep it up. Keep reminding yourself how bad you feel as a result of previous behaviours, and how good your new behaviours make you feel, and if they don't you've gone off track, need to re-evaluate, and get back to your new habits asap - tomorrow never comes.

    Now, what do you want to do?

  • Hi Hidden,

    I think your negative self-talk is sabotaging your efforts. If cycling up hills isn't something you normally do then you are bound to find it difficult as anyone would. The fact you attempted it should be commended. Improving your fitness level is something that takes time.

    Also catastrophising a weight gain is self defeating. Review your week and see where you can improve. You already know you have the ability to lose weight because you have done so.

    I know it can be frustrating when things don't go as you expected like reaching a plateau. You could see that as a good sign that your body is adjusting to the positive changes you've made.

  • I agree with Swimgym. I have spent the last 2 weeks trying to walk up a steep hill where I live without stopping. I have only managed it once but still I carry on. I hate that flipping hill but I will do it again!

    If you are not used to cycling up big hills you need to build up to it and give yourself some breaks - you will get there in the end!

  • You are NOT a failure. You have lost 5 kilos. Go on and lose the other 6.

    All of us stumble sometimes and it's usually when our circumstances force us to consume Sugar laden food at a party. As my wife said to me afterwards "Nobody forced you to eat it." Yeah, like I want to be the only one not eating!

    So cheer up, tomorrow You are starting again But at a lower weight than when you first started and if your experience is anything like mine, The little you just put on will vanish very quickly if you can just manage a day on half your normal calories.

    At the party I was at Monday the host was delighted that no food was left. Demonstrating ignorance of the fact that if half of the food on the table is almost pure sugar then any one who eats one of those Sugar spiked items will have to eat more than they want.

    It's Addictive in the sense that the pancreas will fight so hard to reduce harmful blod sugar levels that it will leave us feeling hungry again.

  • Hi Hidden

    DOn't be down. I knwo it's tough. I'm on the 5:2 diet and somehow I'm hitting a bit of a road block at the moment. Need to get back in gear. But old habits die hard and that is soooo true. I also set up a group on facebook last week for other women only (kf you are female?) Anyway it's for emotional eaters and we now have 30+ members. It's literally to support this issue. One of the things we've been looking at this week has been around being mindful of our emotions. Anyway the group is at if you're interested. Hope to see you there! If not keep posting cos it's such an important issue!

  • Don't give up. Maybe vary your exercise routine as your body seems like it may be used to it. But mainly, don't give up.

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