Ready to share ( week 20 )

ok here last week the family and I found out mum had cancer and it has knocked me.

I managed to maintain last week with all that was going on. Received even worse news that she only had 2 months left and I couldn't stop crying. Since our visit to The Christie this week we have learned that if the chemo responds she will have more time and I feel a weight has been lifted off my shoulders because of this although the scale doesn't show it I feel it within my own being.

I am hoping for a loss tomorrow but not sure if that will happen. Lets just wait and see what the future holds.

Best wishes to everybody on their journey. Stay strong and focused x

22 Replies

  • I'm so sorry for the news about your mum trafford1.

  • Thank you Concerned. I have been so sad since receiving this news. It's gonna be a hard road ahead.

  • Hi Trafford1,

    My heart goes out to you, hope weigh in goes well, but if stay same that is a result.Take care of yourself and stay strong not only for your Mum but for yourself.

    Hope things go well


  • aww thank you for your kind words I will continue to pray for mum and the strength to get us through this.

  • It is such an emotional time for you, trafford.. So sorry to hear your news and you will need lots of support to help your through. Having control of your weight is something you can do but if it does slip a little bit it's okay. x

  • Thank you eeek1110, I know it's ok to slip at this difficult time and I will accept what ever happens. I hope to stay strong and continue with my journey as my mum is so proud of me :-) Kindest regards

  • I'm so sorry to hear your sad news. Your Mum's the priority just now, not the weight loss plan, but try not to turn to food for comfort as junk food will just badly affect your moods and your energy levels. Look after yourself x

  • You are so right MagsMM. Thank you so much for your support x

  • Hi Trafford1,

    I am sorry to hear your news about your Mum - I really hope that the chemo responds so she will have more time. Such a lot to cope with. Sending you a virtual 'hug'.

    I hope you have some support around you, and that you are ok. Hope your weigh-in goes ok tomorrow, I'll look out for your post. The main thing is to look after yourself, so you can spend some quality time with your Mum.

    Lowcal xx

  • Aww you always know the right thing to say Lowcal. Your words give me comfort, thank you. Time is on my side right now whilst mum is here with me, but I wish each day was longer so we can stay together. I am going to continue my journey and continue to make my mum proud so thank you Lowcal x

  • I am so sorry to hear about your mum. Make the most of your time together, treasure each and every moment. You have to go with how you feel at times like this. You might feel that your diet is the one area you can control, or you might think stuff this for the moment. They are both equally acceptable responses.

    I can give you one piece of practical advice : when my dad was dying my sister and I found it difficult to cope with all the phone calls from concerned friends and family, we couldnt cope with their sadness as well as our own. One of the doctors suggested that we change the message on my Mums landline and on our mobiles to give up dates of my dad's condition which meant everyone was kept informed but they didn't intrude on our immediate family time.

    It is quite okay to cry and okay not to. People will want to know how to help but won't all know what to do. Let them take some of the every day burdens from you, e.g ask them to do some shopping or cleaning.

    Obviously we don't really know each other on this forum, but you will be in the thoughts of many of us. Xc

  • you are so sweet and thank you for all of those kind words you have shared, they are so lovely. To know I have the support of everyone here makes this journey somewhat bearable. I wanted to share last week but didn't have the courage to put it out there.

    You are so right the diet is the only thing I can control, but may slip because emotions can take over. I too watched my dad die he went to cancer at the same age as my mum now. It was such a difficult time and for this to happen again such a short time after my dad and knowing what he went through, I don't want my rock "mum" to go that way too. Parents are the best thing in the world and my mum is my rock. I love her so much. I know I will have such hard times ahead and I am so scared right now, but know I need to be her rock in this time of her life.

    I will be continuing with my journey to make my mum proud as this is something she has wanted for me for so long.

    Thank you for sharing and thank you for all your caring words. Your support is definitely needed linggirl x

  • Very sorry to hear your news. Thoughts are with you

  • Thank you Donnammm42 that really means so much that I have your support x

  • Hi Trafford 1,

    My thoughts are with you, your mum and family at this time. Try to look after yourself so you can be there for mum and share hugs, time, memories and of course tears sometimes with her and the rest of your family.

    Your friends on this site will be here for you if you want to share your worries or just rant against the big C here.

    Love and my prayers for you all.


  • Thank you Ros1. I wanted to rant earlier but kept it all in and decided to share now because I recognised that to move forward I needed to put it out there....

    I did share last week but had to delete because I didn't think I should share how I feel, but have found sharing today has brought so much more than I could have imagined from everyone here in this community and I am very grateful to you and everyone who has reached out to me today.

    It was very hard to post but I needed to as I wanted to express how I feel instead of locking it up and it has really helped me.

    Thank you so very much for your support x

  • Be very proud that you have the strength to share your news, there is so much support here, not just for weight loss, but emotional support too. Stay on here, your friends are here to listen and help if they can x

  • Hi Mello17, thank you and I am proud that I have been able to share this today and god has given me the strength to share and receive the help, support, encouragement and receive all the kind words to help me on my path, knowing I have all of this support through this difficult time really does help. Your kind words and knowing I have your support really help me through this difficult time in my life. My mum has mine so I know I need yours.

    I thank you so very much x

  • Hi trafford1,

    Sorry to hear about your mum but treatments have leapt forward over the years and are much more effective and less traumatic. I am a 57 year old mum and have been living with cancer since 2011. I was originally told by one doctor I had about 12 months to live but my own oncologist said I shouldn't have been told that as it depends on many factors and I'm still here 4 years later and showing no signs of popping off soon. My husband says I'm just too damn stubborn to let it get me. My cancer has returned twice but the doctors say I respond extremely well to the chemo and I also have always been really strong and very positive throughout which they reckon also helps. Even the chemotherapy itself isn't always as bad as people might expect. Your mum is probably frightened but the chemo itself is nothing, just time consuming and not everyone has side effects either. I have never been sick during any of my chemotherapy. The first two times I lost my hair and to be honest because I had long hair this was really distressing as it was coming out in clumps when I showered or slept but my daughter shaved it really short for me and I felt so much better because I couldn't see it falling out any more also the wigs are fabulous these days and people who didn't know me didn't even know I was wearing one. The third time I didn't lose my hair as they changed one of the chemicals but apart from extreme tiredness at times, but not all the time, I have had no other side effects at all. Hopefully your mum can be like me and sail through and she is certainly in one of the best hospitals in the country for her treatment! I don't call it the big c, I always call it the little c if I refer to it at all as it deserves no respect. I understand how you feel because my 3 children feel the same and I know it's easy to say but please do try and stay positive. Be determined to beat it and stay strong, you and your mum and I hope she responds brilliantly to the chemo and gets to enjoy life for many years to come and even if it returns they'll just treat it again, which is really just a bit of an inconvenience but needn't stop her from having a decent quality of life. Good luck to you and your mum and I hope all goes really well for both of you. Be strong!

  • Thank you so much this has given me so much hope and I do believe in miracles and you are living proof of that. You have done so well and I love your attitude toward life. She is in one of the best hospitals in the country and the doctors and nurses are all really lovely people so kind and caring. Mum starts her treatment Monday which will last 3 days and I am praying she can get through the first stage and make some progress. We are all being strong for mum although at times seeing her weak and tired is not easy to see but she is surrounded by people who love and care very much and support her through this difficult time in her life. My dad had cancer and didn't beet it and to see what he went through I don't want that for my mum and we tell her to fight and be strong and that we are with her all the way. Work have been very supportive and let me take time off to go to appointments which is brilliant. My mum has always been my rock and now we are hers she can lean on me any time I will be there for her always. You are an inspiration and I thank you for sharing and for all of your kind words.

    Thank you so much x

  • Sending you love and strength 🌷

  • Thank you happy to receive your support Folliegirl x

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