Come to the end of my tether!?

I am just about to turn 29, I have been overweight as long as I can remember and its going up and up. I am now about 24 stone and my BMI is 60, as I am only 5 foot 3. I have PCOS, underactive thyroid and depression. I have tried various options, lighterlife, weight loss tablets, diet, exercise and therapy but I just can't seem to manage it. I have considered gastric band but I am scared of this option, but also can't see myself being successful alone. can anyone help or give advice?

6 Replies

  • Try starting small, don't think about everything all at once at it seems you have an awful lot going on :( Is there anybody you could go for a walk with on an evening or weekend? Start by getting some more exercise just by walking a little to get some air and release some endorphins. Once you start to feel better about yourself and more positive in life, you will be able to control your food more. The liklihood is, they won't give you a gastric band because you're struggling so much with other things and it doesn't seem like it'll make you happier. You need to try and make your happiness go up and the weight loss will happen as a result much more easily. :)

  • Thanks, you are correct. I have had therapy 3 times to tackle my depression, I take something away from each time, but I don't seem to have cracked it yet :(

  • It's a really long road though and it's better to take your time and do it properly to truly move on from everything that's going on. I really would start with a short walk to try and get some fresh air when the weather starts to get better. I also don't buy 'bad' foods so at least when I eat too much, it's not on terrible things.

  • I had a BMI of around 50 at my heaviest so I can only imagine with great sadness what your life must be like right now. You have lots of things going on there and I am sure it does not take a doctor to tell you what faces you if you don't makes some changes now. On a positive note, at the moment you do have age on your side.

    You've established that whole host of past attempts have failed you but this does not mean there is no hope. But you do need to want to change, and you need to want that change more than anything, it might all sound a little cliche but it's that desperation that you need to use to drive yourself out of this. When you start to wane you need remind yourself of how your illness made feel when writing this post.

    This is my personal advice, I won't be in any way offended if you don't take it :) . Keep it simple, at this stage because your BMI is so very high, you would only need to make some fairly simple, all be drastic, changes in order to see a relatively improvement in your health and lose some of your excess weight. You don't need to be getting tied up with counting calories, carbs, fat etc right now, don't even worry about structured exercise at this stage. Just make some serious healthy food changes as it's important you start to heal. 3 wholesome meals a day with 2-3 snacks, cut all bread and bread type products from your life. Avoid processed/factory foods, in simple terms drop the packets and jars. Absolutely no refined sugar.

    Eat breakfast as soon as you can after waking, have a couple of eggs and some bacon, grilled tomato/mushrooms or some cereal, preferably real porridge oats (not instant) or if you can't manage that a cereal with no added refined sugar. Mid morning have some fruit or veg for a snack. Lunch, salad, lot of variety, lot colours, more the better, get really imaginative, you want to aim for 7-10 portions of Fresh or Frozen fruit and veg a day (emphasis being on veg if you can), so the more variety you can get into your salad the better, have your salad with some protein, either ideally a tinned or fresh fish, a couple of eggs or a poached skinless chicken breast. Afternoon snack again fruit or veg. Then for dinner aim for something wholesome again with as much veg as you can manage, a portion of protein and keep things like pasta and starchy veg such as Potatoes and Brown Rice to a small portion. Drink water, tea and coffee with milk if you want but of course no sugar! The critical thing is to aim for those high portions of fresh or frozen Veg.

    A lot of the foods I've listed I personally now don't eat (as some others no doubt reading this will be thinking :) ) but I did and would again if I was in your position. This dietary advice will not get you close to a normal BMI, you'll need and want to make further changes several months down the line in order to continue to lose weight, however this should if you can stick to it take you through 6 or more months and should help you start feeling a lot better quite quickly by helping to heal some of your issues.

    If you want some ideas for Healthy Meals then take a look at the NHS 12 Week Plan but once again do everything you can to get that veg inside you :)

    Other members might have some good ideas for you if you feel this is not for you.

    Please feel free to send me a message if you think there is anything I can help answer for you.

    Best Wishes and the Best of Luck with your very long journey.

  • Hi StarLashes

    Sorry to hear you are having such a tought time.

    The advice given by OlsBean is spot on when it comes to losing weight, and it should also help to combat the PCOS. Cutting out sugar and bread will lower the amount of insulin your body has to cope with, and give your body a chance to use your fat stores.

    If the new way of eating seems difficult, perhaps try changing one meal a day at a time, adding in lots of veg or salad will make up for getting rid of the bread. If you do have to pick up a packet / jar or tub, check that it does not have added sugar.

    Hopefully, giving up sugar won't be a problem for you as it is so important for your health, but that may depend on how much you eat now. You could cut down gradually, or just cut it all out in one go. You may feel out of sorts for a while, until your body gets used to the change.

    I hope you can manage to give it a go. Everyone on this site will be supporting you in your efforts.

  • Hi iv just seen ur post the best thong to do is see wat u eat and try changing da unhealthy food to sumting healthy once uf got used to that dan try changing your portions once u av done that dan start exercise start gently like walking etc the key is baby steps it wil take tym I hope this helps

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