Just joined and very upset :-(

Hi all, I've just joined this site in the hope that I can get some support. I weigh 10 stone and am aiming to get back down to my normal weight of around 8st 10lbs. The weight has crept on over the past year and is prob down to being with a very loving partner as opposed to a control freak!

I exercise a lot but my diet is completely different to what it used to be and I just can't stop eating. I feel upset because I eat and eat because I am upset...

Help please!!!!


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30 Replies

  • Hi, I am in exactly the same situation - 10 stone wanting to go back to 8 stone. I haven't worn my normal clothes for 4 years :( Yes, it is depressing. Are you eating healthily? there are lots of things you will need to cut down if you want to lose weight. what you need is to develop good habits. that's the key. start slowly so that you don't get discouraged. Hard to give more accurate advice as I don't know what/how much you are eating. Keep us posted :)

  • I am so glad that there is someone in the same boat, a lot of people say 10 stone is thin, and I admit, it's not the heaviest weight but to me it's very upsetting.

    My exercise is very good, it's def. the diet! I eat healthy meals but am very much in denial about my snacks...

    Work=birthday cake in the office

    Home= bf who needs choc and is a bottomless pit!!!


  • hi when you exercise you also tone up so sometimes don't always see the changes on the scales but in your clothes as well which is all good

    good luck and don't give up we have to have patience and perserverance its for the rest of your life enjoy x

  • You'll get a lot of support here. Perhaps you are exercising too much - don't forget muscle weighs more than fat. DON'T use sports drinks (not saying you do, but people who exercise a lot do, and they are lethal for weight gain.)

    Try and change your habits of things you eat when you are upset. Instead of grabbing bread or biscuits, perhaps switch to crispbreads with cucumbers sliced on them, or something else that tastes nice but won't shore up the vicious cycle of eat-->guilt-->eat...

    Good luck, and let us know how you are doing

  • I think I need to prepare things more and come on here for willpower when the birthday cake is about in the office (it's a big office!).

    Thanks for your post!

  • Keep your carbohydrate intake between 10 and 14 portions per day (1 portion = 10g carbohydrate), ideally 3 meals x 4 carb portions. uk.sitestat.com/diabetes/we...

    Eat low GI carbs glycemicindex.com/

    Make up the balance of your meals with natural, additive-free, unprocessed protein and fat foods

  • thanks for the links for GI food. they are brilliant. I found GI eating satisfying and good.

  • This could potentially turn the corner for me...I am rubbish at judging carbs. I either eat none or over eat them...

    Thank you so much for your post!!!

  • Well you're in the right place here. << I feel upset because I eat and eat because I am upset... >> I think could cover a large percentage of us. If there was a magic bullet to stop the comfort eating we'd be over the moon. I think one thing that could help is to try and limit caffeine and alcohol intake that can make you feel 'jittery'. That's the one thing that's guaranteed to get me reaching for the carbs so don't drink alcohol unless it's outside my house and a special occasion and have very little caffeine. For me that has made a huge difference but one person's solution sadly isn't the answer for everyone so it's trying to find what works for you. Don't be upset, be happy that you've made a positive step to change your eating habits. Wish you the best of luck. BTW - I would LOVE to be 10 stone :) currently 13 (which is better than the 14 that I was 10 weeks ago).

  • You sound like you're doing amazing!

    Thank you for the post, I have cut booze and caffeine...the hardest thing ever...I'll keep you posted :-)

  • it really is the hardest thing isn't it? especially if you have a heavy social life and all anyone gives out is negative vibes because you're not drinking. Ended up with 6 glasses of red wine one evening as people kept buying them and I refused to drink them (they lost £s, I lost calories!). It's almost as though you're some sort of social pariah. Goodness knows how alcoholics manage to quit, that must take the most unimaginable willpower. Wonder if anyone who's done that has some tips on how to say no when you're body is screaming yes?

  • lol I think the last time I was 10 stone I was 10 years old. A weight problem is a problem when your feet are no longer in view. You People are so luckyyyyyyyyy. I wish I was 10 stone

  • A lot of people say this but it is a case of knowing your body and I am tipping on the edge of overweight...and feel very miserable with it...

    I do understand what you're saying but I came on here for support :-(

  • Andor42,

    Sorry but I didn't find your comment at all helpful, and completely unnecessary I'm 5ft 1ins and weighed 11st 4lbs when I joined the site I was in the obese category, with lots of hard-work I now weight 9st 12lbs, and yes I'm still in the overweight category. I still need to get under 9st to be in the healthy category.

    Any body that joins this site, does so because there weight has become an issue and they need the help and support of other bloggers. Everybody needs to be treated with the same respect regardless of how much weight they need to loss.

  • I agree! 10stone to one person is not the same as 10stone to another, it all depends on how tall you are and what you are built like! Makes perfect sense, does it not?

  • How long did it take you to lose the weight? Just curious as I am the same height and currently 11st 4lb so I'm sure you understand how miserable and uncomfortable I feel at the moment. Day 2...... So far so good!!!

  • I started my weight loss journey on 7th January 2013, I'm no down to 9st 10lbs. I found it quite difficult to start with, but as time has gone on I have found it easier and easier. I just love the fact that I can fit into my old summer clothes again.

  • Sorry I did not mean to be rude about your weight it was not ment that way. It was more a comment of envy I would love to be 10 or 13 stone. I know being over weight is what the person feels is over there own personal limit. I understand its as hard to lose the last few pounds and it is to lose the stones. I wish you well with your weight loss A problem that many fight all our lives I had hoped to get gastric sergery my self as a last resort but I have the wrong post code and should live 3 miles up the road. MY heart consultant did not belive it was true till he tried to get it from a different Area health athority hes in Somerset were in North somerset He thought I had misunderstood why I was refused and was outraged to find it was true. Also in north someset if you do lose weight you can no long get excess flesh/skin removed as its cosmetic. You need to move to Lympsham to get that surgery. (about 2 miles away) from where i live. I now know what they mean by post code lottery for health care.

  • Piepie - you are definitely in the right place to get support on your 'journey' =). I think it's really amazing to read all the comments to questions - there are people out there who care! =)

    I have always struggled with my weight and health due to various reasons, always beating myself up when I felt I had failed yet again! I am now following a programme set within a specific timeframe, basing my mealplan around healthy foods and a protein shake which has been such a blessing for me! For the first time in years, my body feels happy and balanced. I have more energy also. What has also helped me is focussing on exercise (for the good chemicals!), drinking more water and meditating regularly - it's all about creating a positive picture of yourself instead of blaming yourself when 'things go wrong'. Actually, the way I see it, is that when you are working towards a healthy goal, and stick to it, there is no 'failure' - it is all just part of the route to recovery!

    Btw - Im getting these amazing shakes for free because 3 of my friends started using them as well. Let me know if you want more information. =)

  • Hi folks,

    I'd stongly disagree that being 'overweight' is 'what the person feels'.

    Being overweight is something that is quite objectively measurable and assessable. O.K. it's probably more of an indication that a mathematically precise to many places of decimals thing - but you can establish, whatever you "feel" about it, if you are overweight, obese or whatever.

    Now whether you consider being overweight or obese to be a problem or whether you choose to do anything about it or just ignore it and get more and more overweight - that bit is perhaps a matter of what you individually feel.

    But not the being overweight bit.- nor the the health risks that go with it. Those are objective realities.

    Good luck with your weight loss journeys.

  • Here, here! I'm feeling great at the moment, lots of my old clothes are beginning to fit again, I look better in clothes, but when I calculate my BMI..... STILL overweight.

    To the OP, I know how you feel, people say 'you don't need to lose weight' or 'really, you weigh that much, you don't look it', but its not helpful.

    They're trying to be kind but really they are not. You just need to Ignore them. If you know that you are overweight and you want to do something about it then GOOD ON YA!

    Good luck and if you need any help just let us all know. :)

  • Hi Doikosp,

    Well you'd think so wouldn't you? The CDC in the US however has data that people who are slightly in the overweight category have a longer, healthier life expectancy. Ergo, the categories that presumably were set nicely at 5 point increments, are not optimal; i.e. are arbitrary.

    That's contributed to by, objective as it is, the BMI says little about body composition.

  • I agree. I'm 5'6" and 13 stone. I need to get to 11 stone just to be within my BMI. I don't have any health problems friends don't think I need to lose weight, but I know I do. In my work, I come across the health effects of being overweight and don't want to get to that stage. I am on week two. I lost 3lbs 12oz in week one. I've been following the NHS calorie counting plan (1400 a day) and eating lots of vegetables, fruit, protein and onlybrown rise, pasta, etc. The NHS recipes have been a great help (I need food ready when I get in from work to stop me cheating). I only go out on a Thursday and Saturday and count any drinks into the 1400 calories. I no longer drink at home (wine was my downfall) and if I stray (I had chocolate yestreday) then I count that into my daily allowance and have to do without other things. So far so good, but it is going to be a long journey and also a change of life habits. Good luck!

  • Hi this sounds exactly like me , I'm 13st 9 , 5'6" and although hit with a rotten cold at the minute didn't have a loss in my first week , I have been on 1400 cal plan for months before joining this plan and never getting anywhere , was told I wasn't eating enough ( should be betweeen 1850-2250 cals) I've decided to start at the lower end of the scale because I've been this weight for so long now i really need to do something about it , I'm quite fit and healthy just need to sort my food out , I like you would like to reach 11st 👍🏻🙏🏼

  • Thank you all so much for your comments and support, some very interesting posts!

    End of day 1 and already I can see where I've been going wrong!!! Portion sizes and nibbles!!!

    I really do think that this site and forum are very useful...I teach 16-19 year olds and I shall be pinching some of the healthy eating advice/resources to disseminate down and will lead by example :-)

  • I've experienced the same due to exercising more. What I do is eat low calorie meals, fruit, veg, nuts and plenty of water to keep the 'full feeling' this works for me. If I fail today, I start again the next day.

    You could be eating more because of the energy you are now burning up. And you could check out why you are eating so much if you are still concerned.

    All the best on your weight loss programme


  • Hi

    I am just getting started, and for long enough I have been telling myself I did not want to end up like my mum, Health wise! but here I am aged 58 with type 2 diabetes, and would appreciate any tips and advice/support with keeping of the junk food, I am a rehab assistant and there is always chocolate, cake, biscuits being brought in the office form patients.

  • hi duchess. i find if i dont buy or go near all the yummy things i love, i soon lose the notion for them! i am 57 and a bit overweight but im on here to help my partner, and find all the tips and support here amazing! so walk past the chocs in the office and you will soon lose the notion, i work in the nhs and there are always temptations every day too,! good luck... x

  • I managed to stay away from most of the fuddle food at work today but I had to have a single finger twice-114 cals-not bad! I ignored the fat today ;-) x x x x

  • I do the same. A comfort eater for many years. You can do it & good luck. P. S. I wish I was 10st! Kind regards George.

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