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miscarriage

roselee profile image
8 Replies

miscarriage

i recently posted a question on here about a suspected miscarriage, i was in tremendous pain with my back and stomach pains, excessive bleeding, pouring out of me.fresh red blood when wiping for over 10 days before. i knew the pregnancy just didnt feel right.

eventually nature took its course and i miscarried yesterday evening,after ringing a ambulance with huge blood loss.

if you suffer from any of these symptoms go straight to hospital. no matter how many times the hospital tell you you are ok, keep going back !!!!!!!!!!!! i was in 3 times in 4 days i knew the baby was making me very ill.

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roselee profile image
roselee
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8 Replies

Oh hun, I am so sorry for your loss, it must have been terrifying!

Your advice is a very good one, I think. My midwife always tells me to call whenever I feel something is wrong and says pregnant women and mums should trust their instincts.

Take care and get well soon xx

Kazzacollie profile image
Kazzacollie

Roselee I'm so sorry for your loss!!! I had a miscarriage in September and understand how difficult this must be for you!! You are right if you are feeling ill you should go to the hospital only you can understand your own body! You know where I am if you need to talk xxxx

Neska profile image
Neska

I replied to your previous message Roselee.i'm so sorry to hear about your loss .i just cant imagine what you are going through.it must be so hard.i've been given diagnosis:threatened miscariage and i'm so anxious whats gonna happen next.people say stay positive but how can i if i've been through hell already?you are so right.you know your own body and always listen to any signals it gives you.it would be helpful if reception woman from my surgery wasnt so rude and asked me when i tried to see my dr:whats this time?i just hope you have loads of support. You can always write here cos everyone is so supportive. Take care hun xxxx sending loads of hugs your way xxx

roselee profile image
roselee in reply to Neska

they giave me a diagnosis three days before. you must have complete bed rest .....other wise you will miscarry.

cheekymonkey3791 profile image
cheekymonkey3791

Roselee, I am so very sorry for your loss, it is so so difficult to discuss pain and bleeding on here, you find there are many positive outcomes and then you have people like Kazza and myself who have experienced different. In the 1st trimester I am no stranger to your symptoms as I have lost 2 pregnancys, the last being in September like Kazzacollie. Both different and similar at the same time, the first the baby had passed away at 5 wks and I hung onto the pregnancy despite pain and bleeding for a further 4 wks, I didn't know who to talk to and I suffered in silence and found myself at the EPU at 9 wks and deciding to go home and MC, although I found this very distressing it was the right thing for me and the other was not so disimilar to what you have been desribing this last week and I had an imcomplete MC meaning that I thought it was over on the friday but my pains continue over the weekend and on the Monday my partner spoke to the EPU, I went for an internal and found I had not passed all the tissue and so I made the same decision again to go home and let nature do as our bodies intended. So yes, my advice is always 'insist' on talking or seeing someone. In the medical profession this is so common but for us its a very traumatic experience and we don't understand whats happening to us.

I am here to talk if you wish Roselee, privately if you would prefer, no-one understands this like someone who has been through it and MC is a very lonely grief and as i held back when you were experiencing the pain as i wanted you to remain positive I am going to try and help you with the grief the best I know how.......

I found some help online on the miscarriageassociation.org.uk/ there is another forum there for you to talk to others and literature to download, I sent some info to my friends & family so that they could try to understand my grief, there is also information for employers and your partner.

I would also recommend your doctor signs you off work for 1-2 weeks, I needed this time to deal with my grief and even when I did go back I found it hard to control the tears and so my boss very kindly allowed me to do 1/2 days for a few days and see how i went.

You may have other questions like when can you expect a period and so on, again....my personal experience was I had my period 2 weeks after although I was told it could be 4-8 weeks before your body gets back to normal. Months after the MC I would have a panic when I would get the 1st day bleed of a period, it took me back to a painful time and then i would remember why i was bleeding.

This healing Roselee is going to take time and you may never full deal with whats happened but learn to accept it. You may choose to mark your pregnancy in some way, i brought a new angel for my christmas tree and this took pride of place.

There is also 'The Wave of Light' which is when everyone around the world lights a candle between 7-8pm in remembence for those pregnancys and babies lost and it happens on the 15th October every year.

I met some friends for lunch yesterday and decided I would tell them about my pregnancy, one cried so I started too and when i said to the other, you may not know but I MC'd in September, she said, I heard that you did and I did too in November...i was stunned. I said goodbye and walked home crying after hearing this about my friend, I was so sad for her, she said she was so angry she didn't want to talk about it, its such a personal time and I feel very sad as I am writing this but I want to use my experience to help you.

I am sorry if I have banged on and on, I'll stop now. I hope that you can find some comfort in my words and that there are people out there that can help you.

Will be thinking of you, take care & sending a virtual hug XX

cheekymonkey3791 profile image
cheekymonkey3791 in reply to cheekymonkey3791

babyloss-awareness.org/ (Wave of Light) X

Skyblueboston profile image
Skyblueboston

Hi roselee, I'm so sorry for your loss, I have been through a miscarriage at 7.5 weeks only found out at 9 weeks that baby had died. It was the worst thing I have ever been through and took me months to recover emotionally, and a year to ttc again I I was so scared.

Try and take time off work if you can, cry if you want and when you want, talk if you can this helped me allot, I also wrote a letter to the baby I lost and I keep this in a memory box.

Don't be scared to contact any of us on here privately or on the forum, most of us understand how u are feeling.

I wish you a good speedy recovery and lots of support xxxxx

roselee profile image
roselee

thank you for your kndness, x

i tried to continue to be positive, but unfortunate even with complete bed rest. i could hardly walt towards the end. my partner has been fantastic, as this is a sad time for him too. you look forward to it so much and then your world falls apart.

my stomach seemed big, i thought this was baby, it wasnt it was blood clots. i have never had a miscarriage, god is telling me to take t easy and not do lots.

will be in touch xx

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