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20 week scan but still feel all alone

I had my 20 week scan yesterday and my husband and I were thrilled. But at our appointment we only saw the sonographer -no midwife. I had loads of questions. I haven't seen a midwife in about 6 weeks. Is anyone else feeling quite alone in this whole process? We couldn't afford to go private. As a first time mother I just wish I had more contact with a midwife for any queries or concerns. Won't see a midwife for another 5weeks.

7 Replies

In my area I can walk into a maternity assssmentvward ask questions or get examined if I have any worries. I also have been given a number for the community midwives that I can call. What area are u in? Surely u have Been given a number for a midwife team?

I agree with you though, I thought I would be seeing a midwife more, but I have looked at my plan and it seems from 25 weeks I see someone fairly regularly.minthink it has to do with the fact that before a certain point in pregnancy they can't save the baby, so I reckon they wait till your baby is at. Viable stage,which I think is 24 weeks. Bit hash!

Good job we are here:)


Thank you for replying. Maybe I'm just a paranoid first time mother. Just anxious I suppose. It's the unknown. There are numbers on my notes but I didn't think I could just randomly phone them. I just assumed it was for emergency use.


Don't feel all alone any questions you can ask most of us it's not the first time like me I'm on my third. We,ll try to answer the best we can for you, but yes u should be seeing your midwife 4 weekly up to 34 weeks the every two weeks the every week from 39 xx


It is good to have this forum to get advice from others and read other posts


Hello PJ2013. Try not to worry! that is basically what happened to us. It is my first baby too and at the beginning because midwife and scan appointmments are very spread out we did feel a little left to our own devices but appointments do get more frequent when you get to around 25 weeks. I am 26 weeks now and have a midwife appintment every 3 weeks from now on which change to every 2 weeks at some point. This forum has helped me a lot and just bought a baby bible to reassure me! only 5 weeks to wait and you will hear his little heartbeat again! Are you feeling him kick yet? I didnt really start to feel definate movements until I was around 22-23 weeks but when that starts to happen I think you will feel so much better as you will know he is ok



Well I was feeling what I thought was just bubbles of wind but the sonographer told me I'm probably feeling the baby moving but just didn't realise. As u say the more movement I feel the more reassured I will feel


Hi PJ2013, it is my first too. This website is great for advice but every time I have seen the midwife she has said I can call any time. There are no silly questions, as guaranteed someone has asked that one before!

Don't be afraid to call them they are happy to reassure you, that is their job! My husband and I felt quite alone to begin with, but as your pregnancy progresses you will have more appointments. After the 20 week scan we had a midwife appointment 2 weeks later, which helped answer awkward questions especially as you start to think of delivery and birthing plans. Not that I have thought much about that part yet... :-)

I think once you feel definite movement this helps, although talking to a friend, her little boy was lazy and didn't move much during pregnancy that she could tell and he is absolutely fine. Every baby and woman is different, mine likes to let me know he/she is there by moving a lot usually an hour after food and I feel more movement if I am lying down. I was lucky as my husband felt movement through the bump when I began to recognise it as baby movement (not wind I think we have all been there!) and that made everything more real. Sorry, seem to have gone on a bit. Good luck, stress not and use your midwife for the advice/ reassurance you need and don't be afraid to ask! X


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