19 weeks pregnant and separating from my partner.

[AlexSweetMommy]

Hi. I know this is a forum about pregnancy problems and joys but I'm not sure who to turn toand I just want some advice or maybe find someone that is or has been in a similar situation. I'm 19 weeks pregnant with my second child (I already have a beautiful 2 year old boy) and things with my partner are not working out and we've decided to separate. I'm 30 and he's 44 so this is not just a teenager's tiff and I think it's been a long time coming. It's just sad it had to happen now. I think the worst part is that I find myself wishing I wasn't pregnant and it's just heartbreaking. I always thought that no matter how many children I had or what situation I ended up in I would never regret any of them. I just know the next few months will be so hard. I stopped working after we had our son so rely on my partner financially. I've got a brother and sister close by and more family around the world and I know they will support me no matter what, but I could never tell them how I now feel about this pregnancy. I'm not sure what the next step should be. I know I need to move out, but I don't know where I'll get the strength to get through it all. I'm just so heartbroken.

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I'm guessing your partner will have to support you and your children!

Is your house mortgaged/ rented/ council ?

As a single parent your entitled to benefits - Google benefits checker, government 1s best.

I am a single parent with a 3 yo, mortgage and I'm being made redundant in Jan! Have been with my boyfriend 5 years but we don't live together. I love him but he's not very dependable/ consistent and scared of responsibility and being tied down (acts like a teenager even though he's 30 ) , I had my house b4 he come along so always been independent so our situation suited us both . He sees our son all the time and is a good dad but leaves all the responsible stuff to me! He gets all the good without the bad! I am strong and independent, if I knew someone in my position I would think they were a right mug and I'm not saying I'm right but it works for us, we have the usual up and down as any couple but both have our own space.

Just found out I'm 5 weeks pregnant after 2 years trying it could have come at a better time ! Been working part time for 2 years previous to having my son worked full time from leading school . I had mixed emotions when I got + test but only financial not 4 1 min any regret about baby.

I have a good supportive family and think it's about time my boyfriend steped up to the plate and take full responsibility.

Things happen for a reason! You will be fine baby's are life and that's something to be celebrated.

Speak to your x partner , c what responsibility he will take for you and children and where you can go from there. I'm guessing ad he has been responsible for you and child he has a well paid job.

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I am sorry that things have gone that way but the fact that you are expecting makes you even more emotional. Children are a blessing and a gift for life. Time is a healer and one day you will feel happy and glad to have your kids. They will love you unconditionaly and forever no matter what happens. Be strong and look after yourself and there will be a better day. Take care.

[Sarahm84]

Hi,

I'm in a similar situation at the moment. I've just found out I'm pregnant and have a 6year old boy to my partner of 10 years. Our relationship has always been quite volatile and verbally abusive. I gave up my job when I first had my son and have been financially dependent on my partner. I'm so confused as to what I should do. I don't want to stay in a toxic relationship but I'm also scared about being pregnant and trying to support my children on my own.

I'm curious as to how things worked out for you after all these years and any advise you have to give me.

Thank you.

[AlexSweetMommy]

Hi Sarah. I'm really to hear of the situation you're in. These things are always difficult and made 100 times worse when you're pregnant.

I'm not sure how much help I can be because me and my partner ended working things out. My biggest worry at the time was were I and my son would end up living and I had started to apply for housing. I was asked to provide a letter from my partner saying that we were separated and that he didn't want me living in our home anymore in order to be entitled to housing and he couldn't go through with it.

When it comes to housing it's different with every council. But I find the best place to get all the information is Citizen Advice Bureau. They usually have seen it all before and would be able to point you in the right direction for benefits, housing or even emotional support. Also if you have family and friends that you know you can rely on they can give you a different perspective on things.

Whatever you end up doing I hope it all works out for you. Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy. Take care.