What is everyone’s birth story?: Hi, I’m starting to... - NCT


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What is everyone’s birth story?



I’m starting to think about my birth plan but still exploring my options. I’m 37 and this is my first pregnancy. I’ve heard about water births, caesarean (elective) and natural birth. Would really love to hear what everyone’s birth plan was, if the delivery ended up following that exact plan and what you would have done next time/or would you have not changed the experience at all?

Thanks in advance!

22 Replies

I didn’t really have one just went in open minded was a long horrible painful birth back to back baby partial ventouse had gas n air pethidine didn’t do much tbh pain was too intense. My 2nd was petrified it would be the same considering epidural if I could get one but had gas n air again and pethidine this time the pethidine was so good took the edge off it took 3 hours from getting to hospital pushed a couple times all over.

Mrs_MT in reply to gcw104

Thank you for sharing!

I wanted a water birth. 40+5 got taken in and induced as fluid was leaking and getting low. Induction failed - 3 pessaries and absolutely nothing happened. They would have let me try a bit longer as baby was monitored and was doing fine, but having already had a sleepless night and labour not even started, and seeming like it wouldn't be a smooth one even if it did start, I asked for a c section, managed to get a bit of sleep and had baby the next day.

Never even got to the delivery suite, which was disappointing cause I was looking forward to splashing around in the pool!! Honestly, though it was pretty much the opposite of what I had wanted, it was totally fine and given the way things went, I don't regret anything. It is major surgery though, and recovery is tough, especially with your new born to look after and you're on the steepest learning curve of your life!!

I think it's a good idea to think about your preferences, and make sure your birthing partner knows them, so they can advocate for you when you're not in a condition to be making decisions, but as for having a 'plan' to follow... I think it's setting yourself up for disappointment to a certain extent. So I would have preferences but be prepared to go with the flow.

Mrs_MT in reply to MissSaoPaulo

Ahhh this is so helpful thank you! I’ve heard good things about water births, my friend has planned for one in her own home. Before I even thought about getting pregnant, I was dead set on a CS because I knew it’s be over 35 before I had a child. The injury from vag delivery and risk of incontinence petrifies me!! ( risk is higher for women over 35)! But now I’m open to other options as just want what’s safe for the baby!

gcw104 in reply to Mrs_MT

I’m 40 😳 but that can happen when young too I had awful stitches inside and out and your bladder & muscles are stretched so you are a little

incontinent after birth if u sneeze or cough etc need to retighten the pelvis floor muscle.

MissSaoPaulo in reply to Mrs_MT

I wasn't really scared of the pain of a vaginal delivery but I was really worried about ongoing issues from tearing and injury from interventions. I used an Epi-no from about 35 weeks (I posted about it on here) and that helped me feel more confident about my delivery.

My c section healed really well, so on balance, talking to people who have had bad tears or episiotomy, I think I'd take a c section recovery over that!!

My first planned to have epidural, didn't want water births etc (I'm medical so I guess I have a black tinted view of things going wrong). Im glad I had the epidural as.needed stitching in theatre. Was in for a couple.of days.

My second and third i.had with just gas and air and there wasn't time for epidural or anything else. I was quite pleased I was in and out in a few hours and didn't have to stay in the hospital.

Sounds like you need to sit down and make up your mind esp. if you're wanting an elective section as that is something that will need organising on a operating list etc and at 37 weeks baby could come any day. Also re. Section if you're planning.more children esp. in the near future, it might not the best idea, so really you need to sit down with someone and talk about cons and pros.

Ultimately I would have just gone with whatever is the safest option for baby.

Mrs_MT in reply to roxannacar

Thank you for sharing, I’m also more medical. I used to be dead set on a CS because of the high risk of some kind of emergency intervention for mothers aged over 35 if trying to deliver first baby vaginally. Something like 40% chance of forceps/vac assisted/emergency CS. Plus not to mention severe tear down there with risk of bowel/bladder incontinence. But now that I am pregnant (and this pregnancy hasn’t been easy), my tune has changed quite a bit. Not sure what my preference is at the moment, but much more open to other birth options if it means a safe delivery for baby.

I had a water birth at home with no pain medication, using hypnobirthing techniques which was completely wonderful and I actually enjoyed it! I went 12 days overdue so they were getting ready to induce me (which I was not keen on). I highly recommend hypnobirthing if you're so inclined - we did the Positive Birth Company's online course which makes it much more affordable than the in person courses which can coat hundreds. Also the water was amazing for pain relief - getting into the pool really felt great in labour xx

Mrs_MT in reply to copperkettle8

Oh wow!! What made you decide a water birth at home? My friend is due in a few weeks and she is doing the same!

copperkettle8 in reply to Mrs_MT

We only live a 5 min ambulance ride from the nearest maternity hospital so I think the security of that gave me more confidence. Also I've never been in hospital for anything myself so I felt like it would stress me out more to be in hospital. I've read a lot of stuff about how important it is to be relaxed for the body to be able to do its thing in birth and I just though where am I most relaxed basically! I'd do the same again next time!

I hope things go well for your friend!

For my first I went into early labour and had to have an emergency c section as when I got to hospital after a day and a half of contractions that were actually slowing down they discovered baby was a surprise breech baby. I was so disappointed. I ended up being in for 5 days and hated it.

My second I pushed for a vaginal birth which is what I ended up having. My plan was to practice hypnobirthing so I prepped for it by listening to audio books and practicing breathing techniques etc although I didn't do any coursesand to have a water birth if possible. When it came down to it, this all went out the window as once labour progressed it was bloody painful and progressed extremely quickly. I went from contractions every 7 mins to every 30 seconds in about 30 mins. I only just made it into hospital and ended up being wheeled into A&E

resus and an emergency call was put out as they thought I was going to give birth there and then. Anyway they got me up to delivery and after pushing for a bit with just gas and air, baby was getting distressed so they placed a ventous on baby's head and gave me an episiotomy. I managed to deliver without the need for them to use the ventous but it was all a bit traumatic. I was so so proud of myself though and was ready to go home 5 hours post delivery. It was right at the peak of the pandemic so perhaps in normal times I would have been kept in for a few more hours but I was happy with that.

My long winded point is you can't always plan for the perfect birth. Obviously if you want a c section you have to plan for that but with a vaginal birth just put down preferences instead of an actual plan as things do change.

Whatever you choose, good luck!

Mrs_MT in reply to Tgum

I’m really scared of episiotomies- how was the experience and recovery after?

Tgum in reply to Mrs_MT

Not going to lie- it was not a great experience. I found it so painful when they sewed me back up- the local anaesthetic did not work for me and it did take away some of the immediate newborn bubble loveliness. I also got an infection and found it extremely painful for the first couple of weeks to do anything. But now everything is okay and I've not noticed anything different. Also worth remembering that my experience may not necessarily be the same for you. Xx

GM99 in reply to Mrs_MT

Hi, I was so worried about having one and I ended up having to have one. I didn’t feel a thing at the time as I had an epidural. It was sore afterwards, and then uncomfortable for a few weeks afterwards, but it healed well and was nowhere near as bad as I thought it would be xx

I'm not at the point where I've decided on a birth plan yet but I'm reading the Positive Birth Book which has really opened my eyes to feeling more in control and more aware of the decisions I have. Yes we can't expect the perfect birth but we can make the best out of whatever birth throws at us and feel empowered with what we're doing. It's definitely worth a read. Also planning to book on to a Hypnobirthing class - I have real anxiety when it comes to hospitals so I'm sure this will help me stay focused.

Mrs_MT in reply to Toffeelady123

I have added the book to my wish list 🥰.

Hi, try hypnobirthing, it is a game changer, otherwise what i would say is prepare for all scenarios in all my years of working eith mums its been very rare that any gave had a 1st pregnancy how thye planned it. Except if they sid hypnobirithing, but again 1st pregnancy is always tricky.

Mrs_MT in reply to LiaZara

Yes a lot of people have mention hypnobirthing but the course online is so expensive!! Did you use it yourself?

Honestly, make a plan to have a baby and let everything happen around you 😂

I didn’t have a plan, all I decided was that I didn’t want an epidural (just don’t like the thought of needle in back 🙈 and I didn’t 😊)

Waters broke at 40+3 but decided to push things along quicker as there was blood in my water when they broke. Got there at 2am got induced, baby heartbeat started to dip when pushing so I had to have ventouse. I just had gas and air. My baby boy was born and I retained some of my placenta so then had to be rush to theatre as started to go tacky cardiac 🙈 but other than that hoping to go through it all again next year if my next fet is successful ❤️ xx

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