2 more days to go till 20 week scan

[Afrohair]

Scared nervous anxious girl or boy?im hoping for a girl but thinking I’m probably not getting one as long as there healthy eh?thats what everyone says but I don’t believe some people when they say that I think they say it to avoid saying what they would like well that’s not left to me is it ?but it’s ok to have a preference I think

What is everyone else hoping for

[cmbxm]

Gender disappointment is very real, I went through this when I found out mine was a girl and not a boy because of certain female inherited illnesses I carry, I felt like I’d failed her already and it took me a good 4 weeks to get my head fully around the fact I was having a daughter, you’re allowed to feel emotions regarding your baby’s gender and I hate it when people say “well you tried for so long you should be happy with whatever you get”, I’ll keep my fingers and toes crossed you get the result you’re after, when’s your scan? how long til you know for sure? xx

[Afrohair in reply to cmbxm]

My scan is on Wednesday eek!yeah I hate it when people always say long as their healthy were allowed to want a certain gender I feel like that saying is a cop out because you don’t want to tell anyone what you really desire x

[Seb9]

I think what sex of our baby was definitely the least important thing for me. I didn't find out the sex with my baby. I knew whatever sex they were no scan could tell me if they would be kind, thoughtful, smart, loving, funny etc. Things that seem more important to me. So as long as they were healthy I wasn't bothered. I definitely think people can be disappointed if they don't get what they want but I think it's so sad as its really not important and it's completely out of your control, I really hope you're not too disappointed if it's not a girl and that you don't feel guilty as it's pure chance. Good luck x

[Afrohair in reply to Seb9]

I guess it also depends on your circumstances as well I already have 2 boys that’s why I think sometimes people giving the oh as long as their healthy talk when they start having 3 or 4 you have an idea what you want !first child you don’t usually mind unless it’s as the other lady pointed out about her gyn issues .i think it’s your opinion that it’s not important as everyone’s feelings are very different especially when they’ve already had the opposite sex of what they are after but regardless I will love them unconditionally and I’m not ungrateful just wouldn’t like such a big gap neither and think it’s ok to have a preference also guess it depends how far you have come to have a baby but I’ve seen people go through ivf and go onto their second child and state their preference so I guess some people just feel differently about it x

[GM99]

Gender disappointment is definitely real and should be talked about more! Obviously the most important thing is for them to be healthy, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be disappointed when it wouldn’t be the way you’d pictured/ hoped!

The first time round I was absolutely desperate for a girl as I always knew I wanted a daughter and honestly had the biggest sense of relief when I found out I was having a girl. It would have put a lot of pressure on the second one if it wasn’t as I couldn’t imagine my life without having a daughter!

Second time around I had less thoughts about it- or I thought I did until I had my scan where I did feel a bit of disappointment when I found out it was another girl. I only want 2 children so I felt sad that I wouldn’t experience what it was like to have a son- but not sad enough to go for baby number three I don’t think 😂

You’re only human and we constantly picture how our lives are going to be so I think it’s completely normal to feel a sense of disappointment when it isn’t how we pictured or hoped! Good luck xx

[Afrohair in reply to GM99]

Yeah your right I don’t think it’s talked about enough and theirs this stigma around it of you should be happy with what you get kind of thing .but I can’t quite vision myself with another boy as their would be a 7 almost 8 year gap compared to my girl who’s just turned 4 and would grow up with a sister ❤️when I grew up with my brother 2 years apart I always longed for a sister but my mum couldn’t have more kids this is my last baby only time will tell.eek ❤️

[Afrohair]

Hi loves thought I’d give an update I had my scan and pleased to say I’m having a baby girl my partner had a bit of a sulk though so baby gender disappointment is very real!