Struggling to conceive

[Lyns82]

Hi everyone, my boyfriend and I are trying to conceive but so far no luck! I already have 3 daughters but he doesn't have any children of his own. Is there anything anyone can recommend to help us get a positive result before we go to a doctor? We have both been taking pregnacare conception tablets for the last month. Thank you all 😊

[stephkp]

Hi. How long have you been trying for?

[Lyns82 in reply to stephkp]

We have been trying for only 4 months so I guess I just have to keep on trying 😊

[MissEd]

I hear alot about people struggling then it just happening when they relax a bit. Maybe just stop trying as such and see if it happens?

[Hidden]

It took me 3yrs to fall pregnant (I started at 37yrs). But from what i’ve read ‘they’ reckon it takes the average healthy couple up to a year to conceive, so most importantly try not to get too stressed and fixated on it as that will be counter productive. If things aren’t happening after a year you can go to the go to ask for basic fertility tests.

But there’s lots you can do as part of your everyday routine, without stressing yourself out, to prepare your body and create optimal circumstances to get pregnant. Most of it is common sense tbh - just be as healthy as you can. Also, bear in mind your other half can be doing similar things too...it takes both of you to make a baby after all but us ladies often take the lead/take on all the responsibility 😉

Main things you can do:

1) a healthy, balanced diet - whole foods (whole grains), fruit, veg, good quality meat (organic is better as has less hormones in it) and limit red meat, if you’re ok with milk organic whole milk is meant to be best, but for me (because of PCOS) dairy was inflammatory so I cut it out. Also, cut out or limit refined sugars (white bread, pasta, sweets). Drink plenty of water. The books I read also made lots of recommendations around fertility friendly foods and supplements that you can add in to your diet every day so you’re getting the best nutrients. In reality you can be as strict or not as you want with your diet, it depends how good or bad it is now I guess and how many changes you want to make...for me the clock was ticking so I went all out and managed to conceive within 6 months of making changes,. There’s also lots to be said for losing a little weight IF that’s something that’s already an issue for you individually or as a couple.

2) The usual- stop smoking and limit alcohol intake. You don’t have to be a saint but be honest with yourself about whether this is an area that needs changing

3) Light exercise to improve general fitness, but not excessively as it can stress out your system

Other stuff:

- 8 hrs sleep minimum as often as possible

- Get outside as much as possible (helps with vitamin D and melatonin production - yes, liquid vitamin D as a supplement is better in terms of how your body metabolises it)

- folic acid is good, folate is said to be better. It’s a non synthesised version of folic acid and so more easily metabolised by your body

- Reduce stress (long term, constant stress is especially troublesome for fertility). To help with this I did meditation/breathing exercises daily - I did yogic breathing (youtu.be/oFR_zlbLnY4)(Not working as expected?) and downloaded 'Female fertility' app (image of a stork carrying a baby) and listened to three of the meditations/hypnosis tracks (Boost your fertility, Conceive with ease and Fertile womb meditation). This may not be your thing though, so anything that helps you relax/feel less stressed

- Gut health is important - take a good probiotic

- Cut out BPAs (found in plastic) and avoid foods served in plastic containers/heating food in plastic containers (includes take out coffee cups) as this releases toxins

- Reduce toxins: No perfume (or spray on clothes rather than your skin) and Cut phthalates out of all skin care products

- A friend who successfully had ivf was advised to eat warm, salty foods (chips/fries) on egg transfer day and to keep stomach and back areas warm. As I wasn’t pursuing IVF I adapted this by eating salty chips on the day of ovulation (I knew when I ovulated because it was painful) and two days after and used a warm bottle in the evening and heated car seat in the morning to mimic this advice. Who knows if this helped, but I enjoyed the excuse to eat chips 😉

- Remember, the egg that eventually becomes fertilised has been in production (so to speak) for 3 months before it reaches the front of the queue to be released. The more good stuff you do to improve the quality of the egg can both improve the chances of it being fertilised and the over all quality (relevant to natural and assisted conception)

When I was looking at improving my fertility I did a lot of research. The stuff I read could be applied to anyone, so i’ll post below the books I read. Key thing to know = when you ovulate. If you’re not having sex at your most fertile time it just won’t happen. If your cycle is regular this is a bit easier to work out and then there’s like a 3 day window during which your chances of conceiving are best....OR just make sure you having sex every 2-3 days and that should have you covered.

Books:

Period repair manual

amazon.co.uk/Period-Repair-...

It starts with the egg

amazon.co.uk/Starts-Egg-Sec...

Expecting better

amazon.co.uk/s?k=expecting+...

Conceivability

amazon.co.uk/s?k=conceivabi...

Website:

Fertility.org

Lastly, I found that pregnacare preconception multivitamin messed up my cycle (I knew because my period went AWOL for about 70 and then 50 days and returned within 2 days of me stopping taking them). But I’d its not affecting you in that way don’t worry, you might be different.

Good luck!

[Lyns82 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you there are a lot of things to try 😊 I'm nearly 37 myself and my boyfriend is 50. We will keep trying and make some changes where needed. Hopefully I'll be posting here soon with good news 😁😁 x

[Hidden in reply to Lyns82]

I hope so! Do let me know x