Feeling so down at 5wks 5days

[Sunshineraye]

Hi ladies, I just need to talk to someone who might understand. In the past I have had two misscarriages and I have a viability scan on Monday and I’m so scared about it that I can’t stop crying today or worrying. just called the clinic to get with the counselling service but they can’t see me for weeks. On both my BFP there has always been someone close to who finds out at the same time and I’ve been the one to misscarry and they have continued theirs, well yesterday a girl I sit next to work told me she did a test and it’s positive and I’m so scared I’m gonna be the one who miscarries again . I know there’s nothing I can do. I just can’t relax no matter how hard I try 😥 x

[Hidden]

I’m sorry you are feeling awful...being pregnant after a loss is so hard and something I hadn’t really thought about until it happened to me too. I was given advice to just take one day or even one hour at a time, whatever thoughts you are having are not going to affect the outcome. I too only managed brief periods of feeling relaxed before the anxiety crept back in. I have found that trying to stay busy helps to pass the time, although I have felt like I have been frozen in time.

Counselling sounds like a good idea have you also discussed this with your GP?

I really hope your scan goes well, the odds are stacked in your favour.

Unfortunately my best friend and the one I consider to be my person to confide in is pregnant on her first month trying and due just 4 days ahead of me and for me it has all gone so very wrong again so I am speaking from experience xx

[Sunshineraye in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for replying and I’m so sorry you are going through this. I have just looked at ur profile and I’m so sorry and you must be so worried too just to give you some hope, my parents were told something would be wrong with my little brother and she should abort and they didn’t and he’s perfect. I’ve heard so many other stories of this too.

Thinking about going gp but I guess there’s nothing they can do. I mean a scan is the only thing that will help ease my mind. I’ve tried to ask for hcg blood tests but both my gp and the clinic have said no to this as it’s before 10 weeks and I’ve had no bleeding.

I was coping ok until this girl yesterday

Ur messaged has helped and given me hope. Thank u xxx

[Hidden in reply to Sunshineraye]

Unfortunately at 5+5 it really is a case of waiting it out. A scan or bloods might not tell you much at this stage. If you have had positive tests and aren’t bleeding then things really are as good as they can be at this stage but I know the waiting is so hard and painful. Stay busy, Monday is not so far away now and hopefully your fears will go away for a while once you see your little one.

My friends pregnancy really sent me into a spiral of panic too and it’s understandable, we are 3 years into this journey.. it could have been wonderful having babies at the same time and spending our maternity leave together but I also knew the opposite reality and how terrible that would be.

Thankyou for your hope and kind words but things have become worse for us since my last post x

[Sunshineraye in reply to Hidden]

Thanks you so much for ur reassurance. It’s really helped me.

I’m so sorry to hear this hun. I really hope you will be ok, can’t imagine how you must be feeling xx

[Hidden]

I hope it goes well this time I’ve been in your position but we mc again 3rd time hardest thing to keep going through I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. Just have to try to stay positive and hopefully it’ll be ok.

[Sunshineraye in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so much hun and so sorry you have been through MC too, they really are the hardest thing to go through and so unfair x

[FrancyItaly]

I’ve had only one pregnancy and it ended in miscarriage this month at 11 weeks (but baby measured 6 weeks). I can’t imagine how hard it must be when you have 2, I’m already worried about a future pregnancy. I was due on 25th March 2020 and my best friend, also on her first pregnancy, is due on 25th December 2019, so just 3 months before me. What happened to me is very hard for both of us. Try to stay positive, I can imagine that it must be hard and you don’t want to keep your hopes up, but unfortunately there is nothing you can do. I really hope it goes well for you and you will have a healthy rainbow baby, please keep us updated.

[Sunshineraye in reply to FrancyItaly]

So sorry you have been through the same hun. I started to miscarry at 11 weeks too but only measured 7.5. I had a nightmare with it. Was left to pass naturally bye I body didn’t cope so ended up in theatre. I really hope you got the care you needed. Thank you so much hun xx

[FrancyItaly in reply to Sunshineraye]

Hi, I’ve decided to miscarry naturally at home and I’m pretty sure it’s all clear now. I’ve held my pregnancy sac in my hand and buried it in my garden, so I’m sure that’s gone. I bled for only 7 days and I have a scan in a couple of weeks to check it’s all clear and back to normal. I really hope I will get pregnant again soon and have a rainbow baby we deserve. I hope all the best for you too!

[Sunshineraye in reply to FrancyItaly]

Oh hun that’s devastating 😥 i went through something similar 7 years ago but my body didn’t cope with the blood loss and ended up having an emergency D&C. No one should ever have to go through that. We had a funeral service for our little one. I still can’t part with the ashes it’s made me stronger though and my relationship. After mine I went on contraception for a while as I was on anti depressants but I wish I didn’t and I wish we kept trying because after years and years of waiting I ended up with endo which made it harder for me.

You will get ur rainbow baby, try again as soon as you feel able as they said ur super fertile after u have just been pregnant apparently xx

[FrancyItaly in reply to Sunshineraye]

I’m now constantly worried about the rose plant we bought to bury it, that it might die. It’s nice to hear it made your relationship stronger, I feel the same happened to us too. I will not take contraception and welcome all the babies that will come (3 max though!) I wanted to have 1 child and this experience made me want more, after all there is nothing more important than family. I hope I will cope with the worry when I get pregnant again x

[Sunshineraye in reply to FrancyItaly]

The rose might bloom even more 😊It’s tough, the first time I never thought I would misscarry and now it’s a constant worry xx

[hb1986]

I had the same issues in my pregnancy after a loss. I was sure I would lose this baby too. Turned out he was fine and born at 39 weeks

I know what eased my mind was going for private scans every couple of weeks until I was in the second trimester. They cost about 60 pounds but I personally found it so worth it to put my mind at ease.

[Sunshineraye in reply to hb1986]

Ah congrats hun that’s amazing you have ur rainbow baby. I’m really hoping mine will be too. I think I’ll have to get more scans as i will be on edge all the time. Thanks for the advice xx

[Choirgirl84]

I lost a baby at 4 weeks before my current pregnancy but I am now over 13 weeks I hope it goes well for you

[Sunshineraye in reply to Choirgirl84]

Congrats hun, this is reassuring to hear. Thank you xx

[Elynn]

Sweetheart it's totally understandable. Wishing you a wonderful scan day.

[Sunshineraye in reply to Elynn]

Thank you so much xx

[Kitcat12]

Aw lovely, it's hard being pregnant after a loss! Even though I feel my boy kick and wriggle all the time, I am still terrified that something is bound to go wrong. The best advice I've been given is that worrying and being anxious isn't going to change the outcome so try to enjoy the magical experience of pregnancy. Hope all goes well at your scan x

[Sunshineraye in reply to Kitcat12]

Thank you hun for the advice. Been feeling a bit better today. I hope all goes well with u xx

[Kitcat12 in reply to Sunshineraye]

Try to keep your chin up! And thank you very much x

[LittleMermaid1]

I can completely understand how you are feeling. I’ve had multiple miscarriages and I’m terrified of the viability scan next week. I’m currently 5wks 3days so we’re almost at exactly the same point. Also both my sister in laws are pregnant and I’m over the moon for them but I’m terrified I’ll be the one to miscarry again. Sending you all the luck in the world for next week ❤️ xx

[Sunshineraye in reply to LittleMermaid1]

Thank you hun, u too. It’s so hard isn’t it. Let’s hope we both get the news we deserve next week xx

[LittleMermaid1 in reply to Sunshineraye]

Fingers crossed 🤞❤️ xxx