Mommy guilt : I’m a mommy of an 11 year old baby and... - NCT

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Mommy guilt

I’m a mommy of an 11 year old baby and recently found out I’m pregnant again. I don’t want come off as ungrateful because I know I’m blessed to be able to carry a baby. But I feel so guilty for getting pregnant so fast. My baby is so small. He requires a lot of attention still. I feel so sad I won’t be able to spend every second with me. Instead of being happy i feel sad, guilty....I hope it’s just my hormones 😞 I see my baby right now and all I want to do is cry. He’s so little still. Any advice ?

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I know a few people with babies close together in age and they have the greatest bond so maybe look at that as a positive. Hopefully they will be best friends as they grow up. Congratulations xx

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Oh gosh bless you! I've also found myself in a similar position. Joseph will be 1 in 2days & I'm 8 weeks with baby number 3 due in March. No way was I planning a 3rd so it's been a huge shock all round. I've been worried about the age gap, coping with a needy 1year old and a newborn. But it's beginning to sink in now, 1st midwife appointment is next week. I posted last week & got some lovely responses & advice.

I think at the end of the day kids adapt to whatever situation they are in, and he will be absolutely fine. It's us that feel the guilt & the worry, your boy won't know any different & will always know how much he is loved. You will also adapt and learn to share your time. I plan to baby wear a lot!!

It's hard, goodness knows it's been hard enough with a 5year old & a baby but it will be ok x

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Do you mean 11 month old baby? Don't panic, your feelings are not unusual.

I too found out I was expecting my second when my baby was almost a year old, so similar age to yours. I was really happy because we wanted to ttc a sibling but then as reality dawned on me, I started to freak out as the thought of two under 2 is quite intimidating.

One thing I would highly recommend is reading The Second Baby Book by Sarah Ockwell-Smith. She covers all those emotions you are describing and more. Many mums feel the same anxieties you are currently feeling. Really do give it a read. I felt so much better once Id read that book. I feel excited about the new baby arriving in the next few weeks and I'm going to do my best to make it a smooth transition for my firstborn.

Remember, you've only just found out and you have a long way to go yet before the baby actually arrives. Believe me, your first baby is going to do a lot of growing in that time and will be a whole different person close to your due date, with all sorts of new abilities. Talking a bit, eating by himself, sleeping better at night.

If you ever need to talk I'm happy to chat. Just pm me but don't be afraid. Lots of people have their children close together. It will work out :)

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Try to focus on the future, it will be hard having two babies but when they grow up will be great play buddies being so close in age! All the best.....keep positive, you are blessed to have these children so make the most of every second!

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Hi , I have 2 sons that have an 11month age gap and i know how u feel i went through every emotion thinking am i doing the wrong thing but i couldn't have been further from the truth , there now inseparable and the best of friends, I genuinely think it's easier having them closer together than a huge age gap that I did have between having my 1st and 2nd

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I think I can shed some light for you :). My mum had my older sisters born same year 11 months between and they are incredibly close, they loved growing up together they are 37 and 38 years old and had so much fun together they have a unique bond. Don't panic it will work out I promise :) x

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Once you’ve got one adding isn’t that much different as your not getting much sleep and still doing nappy’s etc so it’s just your usual. Your 1 year old will be fine will have a little friend. Mine are 2 years apart I though good god she’ll tip the baby out of a Moses basket so didn’t have one but no she was fine with her and she was a beastie of a child still is lol

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My brother and I are 18 months apart in age and it was the best growing up and we are still super close now - we used to share lots of our friends and did so much together - it was like having a friend about all of the time! I never once felt cross that we were so close together in age - it was such a blessing! Your little ones will love it!

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