Childcare costs!!!: I’m just starting... - Pregnancy and Par...

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Childcare costs!!!

Jwarby profile image
16 Replies

I’m just starting to look into childcare costs for the future. I have a little boy who’s 16 months old and had planned to send him to nursery when he is 2 in Feb 2020. I’m also due to have little brother in sept 2019.

My husband and I earn a reasonable wage, but for the past year I have worked part time and still earned 1/2 of my current wage (work unsocial hours to bump up the wage!) and due to tax being reduced through lower wage.

Looking at going back to work full time when my newest one is 1 after maternity leave, but the cost of childcare is extortionate and from what I have calculated I would be working full time and earning no more than I do now and missing out on my little ones.

I find being at home so much now quite hard work mentally (terrible mother I know) hence being keen to up my hours a little, but if as a family we are no better off and I’m not able to contribute to doing nice things with my little ones when I’m off work then I’d rather take the mental drain and get the time with my boys as I’ll never get that back.

Can anyone give me an idea of what childcare costs you pay out for your little ones? Is it as horrendous as I’m calculating?

If I have a 2.5 year old and 1 year old in nursery full time is it going to cost me about 1200 a month?

From the gov website it doesn’t seem like we’re entitled to free hours until my boys are 3yo

Sorry for the essay and I hope this makes sense and someone can help me!

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Jwarby profile image
Jwarby
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16 Replies
mrsdala profile image
mrsdala

Mostly commenting so I can read the replies lol.

My little one is 2 months, and from what I've looked at so far, full time childcare will cost about 1000 a month. Not worth it as I dont earn much more than that

..

Although to be fair, I haven't looked into tax credits etc yet x

Jwarby profile image
Jwarby in reply to mrsdala

I couldn’t find another thread where it had already been brought up amazingly. It seems bonkers to have to consider this so far in advance but it’s literally the difference between going back to work or not!

Glad your calculations are similar to mine!

pinkie93 profile image
pinkie93

benefits-calculator.turn2us...

This is a good calculator to find out if you can get tax credits to help with the cost.

I pay £44 a day and my LG does two 10 hour days. I claim tax free childcare so the government puts 20% into what your bill is each month. Luckily while I was pregnant I saved money up for nursery and I’m not actually paying nursery fees out of my wage xx

ChrisWest1983 profile image
ChrisWest1983

Don't feel like a terrible mum saying things you feel! Mums who have easy going children might judge you, but mums like me can easily relate and appreciate your honesty! I dread thinking if what it will be like having 2 kids under 3 at home 🙈

I have a nearly 2yo and the second will be born in August, and I find it very hard job to be at home with my boy. I was a nanny for 10+ years and this is the hardest "case" (if I can call it so) He's super active, he's very demanding, had a reflux as a baby and was crying so much at the begging, he's never been easy going, if we go to a playgroup he would hit other children if they would touch the toy he's playing with, so it's no joy to go out with him, except big open-plan areas. Now he learned climbing out of cot- so he's a trouble, and he's second molars are coming through - which contribute to his poor sleeping pattern for last few months where he would wake up at 3am and would settle back at 6am most nights.. I was so lucky as in last week he had 3 nights when he slept 6h straight!

Best age was after first set of 8 teeth came through ~9m until second set came at ~1y2m. He slept well etc.

If I had a child like some of the kids I looked after - I probably would not mind having 10 of them, but after having my son, I think baby Nr2 will be the end of my pregnancy carrier as I find motherhood very hard, because of my child being as he is. And his sister that's in my tummy 28w now is super active - it's always one or the other that keeps me awake.

So - you're not alone who finds motherhood a hard job.

Big hugs,x

becci81 profile image
becci81

Definitely make sure you factor in the 20% that the government put in, tax free childcare. If your fees are 1000 a month then you would only pay 800. X

sweetilemon profile image
sweetilemon

childcarechoices.gov.uk

sweetilemon profile image
sweetilemon

I hear you! I am term time so basically gone back to keep my job for future but now they have done away with childcare vouchers (and replaced with a system you need to forfeit the CB if you want tax free childcare) its really not made working worthwhile. Sad. I would love to be a SAHM but I'm trying to look at the bigger picture.

SilkeP profile image
SilkeP

I feel your pain. There is 19 months between my No1 and No2. If I’d put both into nursery full time it would’ve cost us something like £2500/month here in London. It’s £72/day for a nursery place...

It just wasn’t doable. We ended up getting an au pair, which costs us £100/week, little ones did 2 half days at nursery and I went back to work part time (3 days/week).

This combination meant I was back at work albeit part time and had some adult company and was mentally challenged again, but also meant my ENTIRE income wasn’t eaten up by childcare.

There are also other benefits to having an au pair: if your little ones aren’t well, you can rearrange hours etc and they can be at home with your child as work will not let you have all the time off (paid) that you may need when little ones get chicken pox or whatnot or are just that kind of child that gets a high temp/diarrhoea often and isn’t allowed into nursery for 48 hours each time! You also have a babysitter for evenings in your house already, perfect!

I had a lot of health problems, ectopic pregnancy amongst others, no family nearby... having an au pair in the house was a life saver.

Downside: you need to have that spare room, you take in a teenager most likely and they can be a touch immature. We are currently on au Pair No5 (with Baby No3 just arrived), and I can’t wait for her to leave and have a little break from teenagers ;-)

The benefits outweigh the negatives hugely though, mainly for financial reasons!

emmalucyjunior profile image
emmalucyjunior

I was working full time and paying more than I earned to put both of mine in childcare!

Kata89 profile image
Kata89

You’re not a terrible mum for wanting to go to work! I was desperate to by the time my daughter was 7 months old, went back part time when she was 9 months and it’s the best thing I did. By working it’s teaching our children a lot. The value of work, them to trust and build relationships with others etc.

I agree childcare is expensive. I’m going to try and hold out till she’s entitled to the free hours at three. It’s frustrating that even though both myself and her father have a good wage it’s unaffordable and that there are those who don’t work who get hours from two. I looked into the costs when pregnant and it would have made my going back to work fairly redundant. I’d have had very little left. And left my partner to pay all the other bills. Not planning on having another baby so hopefully can depend on grandparents till then

JNDuce12-13 profile image
JNDuce12-13

I found being at home very draining, I love my son more that life itself but my god was I ready to go back to work to have a bit of a break and a bit of adult company.

Unfortunately unless you have family who can have the boys a couple of times a week to lower the costs a bit it is what it is, and you are probably best staying part time.

I used to be assistant manager of a pub and so worked 5pm-12am which was nice as I got my days but after paying for a babysitter each night I was working for less than £2ph after I’d paid the babysitter. It was just pointless. (I was on my own, my sons dad didn’t help)

When my son got to 3 and got some free hours I changed my job for a day job and was much better off.

I’ve not been much help, but that was my experience.

Good luck! X

Lovefood1984 profile image
Lovefood1984

I’m looking forward to my daughter starting nursery as it means I’ll get a break but at the same time dreading it too as I feel as I’m going back full time I’ll miss out on things, for me I earn more per day than I’ll pay in fees so for our household we’re financially better off me going back full time. It’s hard work raising a child for sure so no judgement here. Our nursery is going to set us back £49 a day for a full day (that was this years prices, due for review in September so may be more by the time she starts) It includes breakfast, lunch and an afternoon snack. It’s open 7:30-6 which is good and is rated outstanding by ofsted. We decided not to look into any others so not sure if we could have got cheaper, probably but I guess not by a lot 🤷‍♀️ x

roxannacar profile image
roxannacar

Before I got any free hours I was paying £1600 a month for two children going 3 days a week.

Cheekymonkey85 profile image
Cheekymonkey85

Childcare costs can vary so much depending on where you are. I'm a childminder in the north west & we generally rent to charge £4 an hour (generally £36 a day) and the nurseries can be £40-£50 a day!

If your not entitled to tax credits etc there is the tax free childcare scheme where the government will pay £2 for every £8 you pay into an account you set up & use that to pay your nursery/childminder. The 30 hours (or 15 depending on your entitlement) start the term after your child turns 3 x

Jwarby profile image
Jwarby

Thank you everyone for your replies. They’ve all been helpful if for no other reason than to realise I’m not alone in this decision- we all have to make this choice!!!

But..... MY GOD THE COST!!!!!!!! 🤦🏻‍♀️

Why are we punished for going to work and being fortunate enough to earn a good wage!

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