Anxiety in early pregnancy-anyone else?

[Tealharp]

Hi all! I'm a naturally anxious person, I also suffer with depression and am currently in the process of coming off some antidepressants as I've been doing pretty well for the past 8 months or so now. I'm now 10 weeks pregnant and feeling a bit anxious because my nausea is subsiding, I'm a bit paranoid that maybe I've had a missed miscarriage. I don't necessarily have a huge amount of evidence to support this apart from a bit less nausea than before, so part of my brain is trying to just ignore that feeling and put it down to anxiety (and possibly reduced antidepressants). But the other part of me wonders if it's worth paying for a private scan just for some reassurance? But then how long will that reassurance last? My NHS 12 week scan is booked for 2 weeks today, which feels like an age away right now! I had an early scan due to bleeding at 6+4 and managed to see a heartbeat so trying to hold on to that as a positive sign too. Anyone else have similar worries or experience?

[Arya10]

Hey, I hear you! I’m prone to anxiety and depression too and have had a few wobbles so far, I’m 6+2. I think it’s normal for anyone to feel worried and anxious during pregnancy though, especially in the early stages where we have no idea if the baby is ok and have to wait for the 12 week scan.

I was looking into a private scan too, however the down side (and what has stopped me from booking one) is that they don’t give you aftercare. So if they find something bad, they just tell you to go see your GP (or at least this is what the clinics near me do). Which could mean you’re left worried for some time whilst you wait to see a doctor on NHS. I don’t think I would deal with this very well. So you just need to work out what would be worse for you, if you think it would be worth putting your mind at ease for a little while then weight it up.

I’m trying to wait until 12 week scan - but like you it is really tough waiting.

I’d say enjoy that your nausea is subsiding and there’s no reason to think there’s anything wrong, soon you’ll have a beautiful bump that makes it all a bit more real.

Also, I’d recommend You Tubing ‘guided relaxation’ and listen to one each day, this has really helped me when I’m struggling with the anxiety. xx

[Tealharp in reply to Arya10]

thanks - that's a very good point re aftercare, I hadn't considered that! Thank you, that's really good advice, I think I need to spend more time doing a bit of self care and try to stop obsessing and worrying so much

Congratulations and all the best with your wait too, it's such a weird time isn't it! xx

[Arya10 in reply to Tealharp]

Don’t be so hard on yourself (this is advice I’m giving to myself too), what you’re feeling is normal and understandable. Self care all the way this is the time to be really really selfish and pamper yourself any way you can.

Thanks - very strange, doesn’t feel real for me yet but the symptoms certainly are telling me it is xx

[Tealharp in reply to Arya10]

definitely self care! Trying to find a balance between planning nice things to keep me occupied and pass the time, but also not overdoing it as I'm totally exhausted!

I know what you mean - the nausea was what was making it real for me! Looking forward to a bit of a bump for a more visible 'real' sign - I'm sure I'll regret that statement in several months time though! xx

Thank you for your input, it's really helped!

[Arya10 in reply to Tealharp]

I know what you mean, I’m so exhausted too which means it’s hard to do anything which means more time to think about it all lol!

Haha, yep, I have a bump already from bloating. Have you told many people? We haven’t told any family or friends (still very early for us) and I think makes it harder, no one to talk to/vent to/make it feel real.

You’re welcome, glad it’s helped a little. xx

[Tealharp in reply to Arya10]

ah yes, the bloat bump I have told a few close friends and someone at work who is just back from maternity, so she's been a useful person to ask questions of as well. None of my or my partner's family live nearby, so needed a few friends to be able to talk to, basically chose carefully - one who has an understanding of mental health issues and someone who has not long had a baby as I thought they'd be useful sounding boards! I'm kind of surprised more people at work haven't worked it out as I am constantly grazing at my desk!! xx

[Arya10 in reply to Tealharp]

When does the bloat bump go away?? I feel like between that and my breasts doubling in size (they were quite small to begin with) people will just take one look at me and know.

That’s good you have people you trust you can talk to. I’d like to tell someone too, we might tell my in-laws this weekend as they’re coming to stay. They know we’d been trying for a long time.

Haha - re the grazing, I was like that before so thankfully I don’t think folk will notice that with me. Falling asleep at my desk they might though 😂

[Tealharp in reply to Arya10]

my bloat bump seems to come and go to be honest, not been as bad for the last couple of weeks, was definitely at it's worst 6/7 weeks. And I'm going to need a new bra soon! It's nice to talk to family about it. My MIL was so excited when we told her, it was amazing Definitely worth having someone you can talk to I think xx

[Arya10 in reply to Tealharp]

Awww that’s lovely re your MIL! Mine can be a bit moody sometimes, so I’m not sure how she’ll react, i mean I know she’ll be happy but sometimes she doesn’t really react to things and you’re left wondering what she’s thinking. So we’re gonna see how she is this weekend. Thanks, I do feel like telling someone (other than my acupuncturist lol) would be helpful xx

[Tealharp in reply to Arya10]

it's quite funny how you end up telling really random people isn't it - we had someone fixing our floor on the day of my midwife appointment, so he got told. Someone rang me to arrange a blood donation so I had to tell them too so basically more strangers have been told than friends and family! haha!

[Kempton]

It's really normal for the nausea to stop around that time. Your hormones are just levelling off. Try not to let it add to your anxiety. I know it feels like ages away, but only a few more weeks until you get to see your bub at an ultrasound!

All the best.

[Tealharp in reply to Kempton]

thanks - I have read a few things that suggest that, and it's not as if it's totally gone - or the tiredness for that matter! ha! Just need to settle my brain.

[MissSaoPaulo]

My nausea wasn't that bad anyway and it went away around week 10, and by week 11 I had my energy back and was feeling really well again. I think it's quite common for symptoms to clear up around this time xxx

[Supergirl87]

OMG this really could be me. I'm 13+4 and literally anxious about anything and everything and preparing myself for the worst case scenario in every situation. Don't know what to do about it really, I am going to mention to midwife at my 16 week appointment. Please be honest with your midwife. I was straight away and she already put loads in place to help me

[Tealharp in reply to Supergirl87]

Definitely mention to your midwife, I had a brief chat with my midwife at the booking appointment but I was doing much better then. I feel a bit more settled now so I wonder if it was just a bit of a wobble from the reduction in antidepressants, think I'll book a review with my GP this week as well to check in. Glad you've got plenty in place to support you, that's good. I know there's a perinatal mind group near me so think I'll find out when they meet so I can get some support that way too. ❤️

[Supergirl87 in reply to Tealharp]

Ooh may ask to go to that if there is one near me. I have some support definitely and going to try hypnobirthing too

[Tealharp]

Quick update- I had my 12 week scan yesterday and unfortunately it was bad news. Going back to the hospital for a medically managed miscarriage today. Hopefully things will go better next time...

[Arya10 in reply to Tealharp]

I’m so deeply sorry to hear this Tealharp, take good care of yourself xx