Advice @ 7 month pregnant: I never know who to talk to... - NCT

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Advice @ 7 month pregnant

Baby-g
Baby-g

I never know who to talk to but my partner has stole from me again! Im almost 7 mth pregnant and this has happened a few mth ago and i got him to leave but took him back under promises...hed never do it again...he works full time but gambles! Just today as we were due to go out he told me he took my bank card and my money friday. Ive asked him this time is it and he has to leave for good...ive had little support in my 7 month and wonder if this stress is worth it...this is my first baby and im sure i can do it alone. X

9 Replies
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Hi Baby g.

Im really sorry to hear this. This is the last thing you need. A partner is for love support and trust. If hes not this then there is no point him hanging around to just hurt you more. He clearly hasnt learnt from last time. Did he seek any help for his gambling addiction? Have you guys tried counselling?

I personally think you are better off without him and yes you will manage on your own but its all down to how you feel and what you decide to do. At 7 months you dont need this stress.

Do you have a good support network? Any family that live nearby?

Whatever you choose to do, i pray its the right decision. It can't be easy for you x

Baby-g
Baby-g
in reply to Masha111

Thank you. No he dosent let you speak about him gambling but is text book adict as he can very quickly turn it to me never appoligizes but can say all my weakneses in a small space of time to bring me down. Its so cleashey but im baby mum number 3 but i did think it would be different for me as im an honest nice person...but no such luck.x

Masha111
Masha111
in reply to Baby-g

He doesnt sound like a nice person. Selfish more than anything. You have baby to think about now. Put yourself and little one first. Thats most important. Good luck going forwards. x

I think you’ve already decided what to do. He’s not supporting you at the time when you most need support and you deserve better.

Unfortunately he’s an addict and unless he accepts this and accepts the help that it sounds like he needs, things won’t change. Addiction makes people selfish and you’re right - it’s often easier for them to shift the blame onto someone else than accept responsibility.

If he’s not prepared to get professional help, get out now in order to give you and your little one a stable future. Good luck x

Baby-g
Baby-g
in reply to kt_11

Thank you all. Its so tough close to christmas...never thought id be in my 30's having first baby alone. Hes asked me not to contact him or hel delete me completly! Does anyone know if my midwife can help at this point? Feel so low.x

kt_11
kt_11
in reply to Baby-g

I would imagine so, yes. Part of their role is to identify people who for whatever reason might need more support during and after pregnancy such as those with mental health issues or difficult social circumstances etc.

Not saying you’ve got a mental health problem - your feelings are perfectly normal given what’s happening but you might just need a bit extra support offered if you’re going it alone.

Have you got any family or close friends who could help? Could you join an ante natal group to meet other people who are having babies at similar times? I’ve got a partner but I’ve still really benefited from having my group of NCT girls to chat about baby stuff. xx

Hi Baby-g! I'm so sorry you're dealing with all this at a time you should be celebrating and taking things easy. Please talk to your midwife & health visitor as well. You will be fine without him, right now it's all about you and the precious life you are carrying. Congratulations to you, I'm wishing you all the best x

Oh how awful for you but you are making the right decision. Choosing to stay with him would mean choosing that for your child too. He is not good for either of you and it looks from your other responses that he has done this before. He is a very very selfish man and you and your baby deserve so much more.

You can do this on your own and there is help and support out there for you.

You are having a lucky escape if you ask me. And you should also call the police on him for stealing from you.

Big hugs lovely xxx

Hidden
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I had similar situation and bit worse then yours... My partner was gambling taking my money all my savings...emptied my bank card even gone in overdraft and plus found out he was using some kind of drug...went to police... Now struggling staying at my brothers place because have shared tenancy but all bill and rent on my name... Police doesn't do anything have done 2 statements so far but nothing. Don't risk staying with your partner because he might get aggressive...yours and baby's well being is always 1st

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