Blog? Other ideas?

[Major2116]

Sorry for the long post! I'm in need of a bit of inspiration. For a while now I have been considering a blog may be or something similar.

For those who I haven't really spoken to, I've had 2 early miscarriages. Our first, there were complications meaning the miscarriage lasted a month plus the 2 weeks of bleeding as well. Our second, was the total opposite.

I have battled anxiety and depression since losing our babies (more so anxiety).

We lost 2 babies and then found out we were pregnant again all within 7 month and we were blessed with a beautiful healthy baby boy. Although I could not be happier, it has heightened my anxiety for obvious reasons and I do struggle being apart from our son.

I'm so lucky to have such a supportive and understanding fiancé, family and close friends who are worth their weight in gold!

I feel like I'm at that stage where I'm quite open now and have come to terms with the fact that we have 2 angel babies who chose our gorgeous boy for us to give birth to on earth. I know I'm not the only person that's probably feeling like this. If I can help people with their mental health too or just share experiences then that would be amazing but I just don't know how. Does anyone have any ideas?

Thanks for reading!

Charli x

[Sisi14]

Aw I think this is amazing of what you want to do and that your happy and ready to talk about it which will help you but also help others and find comfort in each other’s experience. This board has helped me with a lot since losing my twins and it’s been nice talking and helping others who’ve experienced the same. I don’t have much advice but I think by you wanting to write a blog and speak out will help who heal too my lovely 😊 xx

[Sisi14 in reply to Sisi14]

I also asked an advice today if there is any training on becoming a counsellor funny enough because of my experience and already being a mother and child support worker as I thought I could do whilst pregnant now, my advisor told me to look into SANDS as she said they are good as when I lost my twins at 13 wk scan the man who scanned me said it’s just one of those things no remorse no nothing apart from that’s it and basically next ! I eventually put a complaint in as no one should experience and feel the way I did that day . Too many see it as a job and job only and forget about the caring side ! Xx

[Major2116 in reply to Sisi14]

Thanks hun! I have heard of SANDS, will have to have a look online. I have considered being a counsellor as I've had counselling 3 times myself but I'm not sure emotionally that I could deal with the job.

That's a shame that you had to experience such a bad time never mind someone being so rude during one of the hardest times of your life. The ladies that scanned me were nice but there was 1 rude doctor! Couldn't be doing with her.

I care for the elderly (female) and some people see that as just a job but to me it's so much more. I care for those ladies like I would like my family to be looked after xx

[AllWeNeedIsluv]

I'm sorry for what you've gone through hun. I can totally relate been there enough times. But feeling very blessed to be a mum to my 4 year old girl and 24 weeks pregnant with my boy.. So blessed it's unreal. But the anxiety is, really another level. I understand completely.

Have you thought about becoming a councillor? I personally think there isn't enough help out there for ladies/families that suffer from loss from the way we're tret in hospital made to sit amongst other pregnant happy mums to the lack of resources mentally iv only ever once been given a leaflet around miscarriage in all my 6 losses. No one of the professionals seem to care. I don't get why. I do get that their busy and see this all the time but we're human for God sake not bloody robots that get poked and prodded. Maybe volunteer to have a help line and set one up like endo UK or maybe do a blog and respond to others that reach out to you. Either way what you decide to do is amazing and you've a heart of gold. Congratulations on your baby boy and bless your sleeping angels. All my love

Cat

😘💖💙

[Major2116 in reply to AllWeNeedIsluv]

How you've coped losing 6 babies I'll never know! Congratulation on your baby boy!

I have thought about being a counsellor but emotionally I'm not sure if I could cope. I'm a strong person but sensitive! I'll probably want to cuddle everyone!

I do think it's unfair how we have to see pregnant ladies after being told we've lost our babies. Leaving the hospital n seeing pregnant women smoking and can clearly tell they've abused drugs is soul crushing on top of losing your baby.

Thanks hun. When I became more open about losing our babies, the amount of people that spoke to me n said they've lost was shocking. You'd never of thought it's more common than you think. People I've worked with for 4 years told me they'd lost and we shared our stories. I just wanna help.

Wishing you all the best in your pregnancy! Xx

[AllWeNeedIsluv in reply to Major2116]

I know what you mean hun, all the ppl that go through loss you just wouldn't think it's all that common. Out of my large, family on my mums side mainly all women there is only one cousin that, has, suffered 1 loss and I'm the reoccurring one no one shows sympathy or anything but they like to talk about why I keep trying etc.

Thanks hun I'm feeling very blessed.

I get the sensitive side too I'd be the same but sometimes, a hug is a big help it just shows that you really, care and, empathize it would help hun.

I'm glad your at a place where you can look back, and use this sad experience as something positive, there really isn't enough emotional support out there for us, at all. Hat off to you hun

😘💖

[Major2116 in reply to AllWeNeedIsluv]

I cant imagine what thats like for you! It's hard enough being down about wanting a baby and having others comment on it, especially family.

Thanks hun. I had counselling but obviously they stay professional and can't share experiences (if she had lost or not). Talking to people who have been in your positions helps so much more x

[SilkeP]

I’m in a similar position, wanting to write about ectopic pregnancies.

A friend of mine has recommended using WordPress for blogs, she says it’s really easy - I haven’t tried myself yet!

[Major2116 in reply to SilkeP]

I'll have to have a look at that hun. Thank you.

I think that's a good thing to do! Not many people that haven't had an ectopic pregnancy know that much about it. I myself being one of those people xx

[Georgina_D]

Awww sending you love. Perhaps you could work with a charity helping women with pre or postnatal depression such as Acacia?