Please help my daughter: My daughter... - Pregnancy and Par...

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Please help my daughter

marksenior35 profile image
27 Replies

My daughter gave birth to a boy at 24 weeks last year. He died at one month old. She is now 16 weeks pregnant and is again showing the same signs which resulted in her giving birth at 24 weeks. She also has a heart condition and is currently being observed by a consultant one a week...on a Tuesday. She went into A&E on the advice of her mid-wife on Friday evening but all that they could offer her was to be admitted so that they could make her comfortable in case she was/went into labour. Apparently nobody in St James' or Leeds Infirmary would be available to help until next Tuesday. Does any kind person out their have any advice as to what we can do or who we can ask to get some help?

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marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35
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27 Replies
Lyndsaytw79 profile image
Lyndsaytw79

That’s so sad 😞 sorry to hear this. That sounds ridiculous, they should have found which hospital in Yorkshire could help and transferred her, how can they possibly expect her to be okay with that?! What are her symptoms? Feel awful for you all. Is she is labour ward then?

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to Lyndsaytw79

Hi Lyndsay. Thank you so much for your response. You will understand that as a 50+ dad this is not my area of expertise. My ex-wife is with my daughter in the hospital and I am waiting for any news. Thank you again for your concern.

Lyndsaytw79 profile image
Lyndsaytw79 in reply to marksenior35

Let us know how she gets on. All the best

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to Lyndsaytw79

Thanks again Lyndsay. I will let you know how she gets on.

kt_11 profile image
kt_11

Depending on what type of help she might need, they will definitely have someone on-call for obs/gynae and cardiology all weekend. Good luck & hope everything is ok.

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to kt_11

Thank you kt_11 for your reply and your kindly good wishes. I shall pass them on to my daughter. As for the on-call obs/gynae and cardiology over the weekend, my daughter was told by a hospital doctor yesterday evening that she would have to wait until her next appointment with the consultant on Tuesday. Having lost her first born she and her mum have apparently insisted on help at the hospital today and the hospital have now spoken to her consultant. I don't know any more at this point. Thank you once again kt_11. Your input was well timed.

MelBong profile image
MelBong

Hi there, I had my baby at 28 weeks after my water went at 26, they can give her things to stop her going into labour? Have they checked her for infection? She needs to drink lots of fluids and try and stay calm. There is a Facebook group which has many experienced ladies on it which can offer advice, there may be someone in your area. Try typing in premature birth also little heart beats pregnancy after pprom which is one to do with loosing your waters but much of the advice is about prolonging pregnancy. Do they know why she keeps going in to labour does she have an incompetent cervix? They can place a stitch in to hold it together depending on how far along she is. Sending you prayers and strength x

MelBong profile image
MelBong

Just to add this baby is classed as viable at 24 weeks they should be doing all they can, are u in a hospital with a special care unit?

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to MelBong

Hi MelBong.

My daughter's first baby was born at 24 weeks. He died one month later. The NHS input could have been of a much higher standard. My daughter has just told me that this time around the hospital seem to be taking her seriously and have now contacted the consultant responsible for her care. Along with her cardiac issues my daughter has issues with her cervix. (As for it being an incompetent cervix...I'm the dad of four children and still wouldn't know what an incompetent cervix was even if it bit me in the leg!) I was with her when the consultant talked about the possibility of placing a stitch in etc but can only remember spending all of my efforts on concentrating on listening than I was actually hearing what was being said. I cannot thank you enough for your prayers and I can tell you that I have taken from the strength you have sent. I promise that I will pass your message onto my daughter. x

Sisi14 profile image
Sisi14

Prayers and thoughts are with your daughter and baby as well as her loving parents!

I know have no experience of this myself but my sister in law had her twins at 26weeks and they trued to stop her labour many of times but it wasn’t holding! They’re now 4 years old.

If you are concerned about anything just be persistent with the doctors as no way should your daughter be left and feel scared again they should be helping her.

Wish you all well god bless xx

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to Sisi14

Thank you so much for your kind message Sisi. I'll shall pass on your sentiments. My daughter has just told me that this time around the hospital seem to be taking her seriously and have now contacted the consultant responsible for her care. The power of prayer is surely a wondrous thing and I'm pleased to read about your sister-in-law and the twins.

God bless to you and yours Sisi. x

Sisi14 profile image
Sisi14 in reply to marksenior35

Thank you for responding, I’m so happy that your daughter is finally getting the help she deserves and they’re listening to her and her needs !

I will keep you all in my prayers !

Xx

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to Sisi14

Thank you again Sisi. xx

AllWeNeedIsluv profile image
AllWeNeedIsluv

Hi

I just wanted to send my love and hope your daughter and her baby are being well looked after. I'm thinking of you all and my prayers are with you at this very stressful time. Please do let us know how she gets on .💗

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to AllWeNeedIsluv

Thank you for both your kind message and your prayers. I shall pass your message onto my daughter and will be happy to let you know how she gets on.

Supermummy profile image
Supermummy

I'm so sorry you hear this! I pray that every thing goes well for her this time! May God help you keep strong at a hard time like this. In other countries women are throughly looked after by their gynacologist not a midwife and I think that's what we're doing wrong in this country!

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to Supermummy

Thank you so much for your kind words Supermummy. Your prayers are very much appreciated and I shall pass your message on to my daughter.

Ranju91 profile image
Ranju91

Hi,

Please do give our prayers and best wishes to your daughter, her lil one and entire family. May god bless her with healthy and happy pregnancy.

Prayers🙏🙏

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to Ranju91

Hi Ranju

Thank you so much for your kind message and much needed prayers. I am certain that yours and all the kind messages received via this wonderful site will give my daughter as much strength and warmth as they have given me. Thank you again.

roxannacar profile image
roxannacar

I think it's very difficult to judge the situation... It depends what symptoms she is having... A cervical stitch can be done to try and help the cervix but this by no means guarantees things. Unfortunately baby will not be viable at 16 weeks if labour were to happen... And there isn't much you can do about it. At 24 they are considered viable but mortality rate is still high unfortunately.

I think the important thing is to find get her consultant involved be obs&gynae or cardiology and find out if indeed anything can be done about the situation and if it can when will it be done, asking about any pro&cons and risks.

It's a stressful situation but hopefully will end for the best

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to roxannacar

Thank you for your reply roxannacar. My daughter was told by a fellow patient yesterday that their consultant has left instructions for him to be contacted in circumstances such as those relating to my daughter because of the complexity of such situations together with the lack of trained support staff. Whilst I am the first to say "don't shoot the messenger", having met the consultant I believe he is a man who goes that extra mile. The staff seemed somewhat reluctant to contact the consultant over the weekend but my daughter and my ex-wife pressed the point and my daughter tells me that people are now listening. Her consultant has been contacted.

When I posted my initial message on here I guess that, as an ex-husband and a dad of distance, I was grabbing at straws but couldn't find any straws to grab at.

My thanks to you and all the other kind people on this site for giving out my way some of those straws. Please be assured that I will pass on those same straws to my daughter and her partner.

Thank you again roxannacar.

claire16c profile image
claire16c

If she needs a stitch in her cervix then I would assume she needs to insist on seeing a consultant earlier and arranging this. do not let anyone fob you off - your ex wife can find the PALS office in the hospital if they are being unhelpful, and they can help her x

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to claire16c

Thank you for your message and advice Claire. So very much appreciated. Both my daughter and ex-wife seem to have taken your advice before I have even forwarded your comments to them. The consultant, a really great bloke, has been contacted over this weekend and my daughter tells me that she is now being taken seriously. Thank you again Claire....x

claire16c profile image
claire16c in reply to marksenior35

Great! Sadly some hospitals don’t take patients seriously and we have to stamp our feet. But from seeing what has happened to other people it’s so important to be loud in this sort of circumstance. I hope she can now get the help she needs x

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to claire16c

Me too Claire. Thank you once again for caring. x

Jazzy313 profile image
Jazzy313

Hope all is well best wishes too all of you! Maybe she should ask Doctor if Makena will work for her! Considering heart condition they may still give to her under close watch if she haven't went into labour yet! I'm no doctor or nurse but I hope they can give her something to prevent preterm labour!

marksenior35 profile image
marksenior35 in reply to Jazzy313

Thank you for your message Jazzy and your good wishes. Things seem to have quietened down a little bit just now but I will tell her to mention Makena when she sees consultant tomorrow morning.

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