I am 13 weeks pregnant and very sick my GP and Midwife are both useless!!! No help from anyone. Please somone help me....!

I am 13 weeks pregnant and I live in a village area whereyou GP works part time and the midwife I have been given has cancelled appointment after appointment not answering my calls or replying to my messages. I feel very alone and lost. I am sick all day stay in bed . Movement makes the sickness worse I can't eat very well I constantly salivating and can't drink as I will throw up. I feel weak tired all the time I can't stand up for very long as I get so weak my stomach can't hold it i am out of breathe and have palpitations and my hand tremble I feel dizzy and faint. Recently I have also been having a very sore tongue it feels like a sharp knife has cut right along the middle of it. I have no friends around me just my husband who is at work all day and has to come home and cook for us as I can't stand to be around food I can't smell it or even look or talk about it. I have tried to contact my midwife but I haven't even met her yet she doesn't reply to anything i ask she is the only one we have in the clinic and I don't feel happy having someone I can't depend on I have been so stressed in tears and I know it's not helping me or the baby. To add to all this I also have fibromyalgia which is 100 times worse I feel so depressed I keep thinking dark thoughts. I want to go private but we can't financially. I cry myself to sleep every night I don't know what to do...my life is a nightmare right now...please help me ladies any advice would be really appreciated thanks!!

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20 Replies

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  • Go the nearest walk in center! Meanwhile if you have some questions you want to ask call 111 they are very helpful and it's free.. you can also create an account at the

    cgbabyclub.co.uk/

    They send you a weekly update on pregnancy stuff and they also have live chat with a team of midwifes, you can send messages or call them, they gave me lots of support during my pregnancy

    Wish you to get better!

  • Thanks for the replyear munyze I will also have a look at the website. I am afraid of having HG and not being looked at. The health system really sucks! Thanks though!

  • H

  • Hi if gp/midwife are not helping then go to the next stage - NHS helpline or walk in centre/hospital x

  • Some health care workers are useless which is no good for you I know exactly how you feel I was desperate to fall pregnant with my first and when I did was over the moon until 6wks then I was crying into the toilet saying it was the biggest mistake of my life and I couldn't cope I wanted someone to take all the pain and misery away people were not understanding at all lucky I had a lovely doctor but midwife was useless and so was Triage. Try this website they have a number to phone and speak to someone pregnancysicknesssupport.or... I'm currently 39weeks pregnant with my second and this pregnancy was worse cause I was signed off sick wks 6-12 its horrendous but with my first it was only 2weeks of hell it is all worth it! Anyways try to sip liquid just a little and often if your in pain take paracetamol you're only allowed half the usual dose 1tablet 4times a day it will help get you back on track and although you are suffering you can be assured baby is thriving all is good even tho you probably feel like you're dying, xxx there was a thing on tv recently where in Aberdeen they've opened a centre for people like us who don't thrive during pregnancy for them to go in and have Iv fluids to rehydrate I only wish I'd had this service I went into hospital this time but they wouldn't hook me up tho after calling 111 I did get paracetamol and and anti sickness injection which all helped me get myself back on track! I hope this big ramble makes sense and helps you to hang on in there xx

  • Hi Nicki1984 thanks for your reply! I am trying to sit little and often. I went to my GP again today and she sent me to A&E she saw I was dehydrated and have alot of palpitations. Sounds like Aberdeen have a well advanced system than what we have here. It's really sad that people like us have to reach a critical situation before anyone does anything. Thanks for the advice and good luck with it all!

  • So is the gp Useless cause they work part time? Sounds like they assessed you and sent you to hospital which sounds completely appropriate. You can change gp practice if you're not happy with things

  • Hi Supermummy,

    I am so sorry to hear what you are going through. It's exacerbated by the lack of support from clinical staff when they need to be treating you to prevent dehydration and further sickness. There are medications that can be safely prescribed in pregnancy, but I had a real battle in the beginning and then I was made to feel guilty about taking them (a pharmacist made a comment about the dangers when I was collecting my prescription, which made my husband go on a wild goose case-Wikipedia-search where he found an article on negative effects of ondansetron - nightmare). Anyway, the Pregnancy Sickness Support helpline were really amazing and I was sent the following rcog.org.uk/en/guidelines-r.... In that link there should be the treatment guidelines set by the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists for treatment of pregnancy sickness. All health care should follow this and I was told the way my case was being dealt with was not 'best practice'. My sickness started and went away by week 12, then came back in a completely different way in week 15/16. I had an infected and needed to have surgery. That was 2 weeks ago and I am still struggling. I have pushed my gp for a differential diagnosis but I am told it's just pregnancy sickness coming back. I have now been in touch with my obstetrician, who will review me. Fingers crossed! This has made me feel quite down, so I have also asked to see the perinatal mental health team.

    Do you have similar resources at your maternity hospital? If it's making you depressed, I would recommend asking for additional support.

    I hope this helps and hope you find a resolution soon. It's a sad situation when a pregnant woman has to battle for basis care and support. It causes more stress than is necessary! Xx

  • Hi Ekatierini I am so sorry to hear what you're going through you are so right that all this adds to the stress and makes your prone to depression too. I was admitted to A and E and was put in the drip for being dehydrated. They were worried about blood clots as I was very out of breath and have palpitations so i had am ECG done but they said if it continues to go back again. I am very weak and standing up just gets myou heart racing like mad that can't be normal. Can I ask you how did you get infected.? I have not had any support whatsoever from my midwife she hasn't answered my messages or texts my husband called her several times too but she's never got back and as we live in a village area she is the only one we have here this has definitely added to my stress levels we are thinking to go privately but that will cost 5k which is very expensive for us so I don't really know what I'm going to do. I hope everything goes well for you!

  • Hi Supermummy,

    I am so sorry to hear that your plight continues! Funnily enough, my GP has just decided to admit me to hospital again because I am not improving. Just need to wait for the call!

    Were you given anti sickness tablets in hospital? If so what were you given and did it help?

    My infection was a Bartholin's abscess, which had to be drained by surgery. I had to have an epidural because having a general anaesthetic was too risky.

    I was hoping I would feel better after the operation, but things have got worse. I am 18 weeks now and wasn't this bad in the first 15 weeks! I am so worried this will never impact.

  • Improve! But I wish the treatment would have an impact!

  • The sore tongue could be oral thrush if you've been vomiting a lot/having acid reflux?

    Is there any food at all you can keep down, or drink? For me it was very limited - porridge, yoghurt, baked potato, crumpets, sometimes cereal with small amounts of milk or toast. If there is something you can palate more easily, try to have more of that.

    If you can't keep anything at all down, then you need to go to a hospital and get on a drip most probably to replace fluid, salt, sugars, electrolytes. Where is your local maternity unit/maternity ward? While you are there you can ask if they have any nurse prescribers or consultants who can give you some anti sickness medications.

    x

  • Go to your local walk in and tell them the situation Cyclizine is pregnancy safe and is a very effective anti sickness med i was on it after being admitted to A and E 3 times for severe vomitting, two of them leading to hospital stays.

  • Hi Kate thanksfor your reply i am already on cyclizine and taking it 3 times a day which is the maximum you can take it. I was hoping there's somethingstronger as I've been taking it since I was 10weeks pregnant it seemed to work at the beginning but now it seems my body has become use to it.

  • Call NHS 111. They may be able to direct you to a local out of hours GP.

  • Hi supermummy,

    I'm pregnant with my 4th and having reached 15 weeks I think the sickness is finally subsiding. I've never felt as awful as I did over the past couple of months. I know exactly what you mean about movement, cooking smells, salivating- it was like there wasn't anything I could think about other than the nausea and although I wad only throwing up once or twice a day it was hard to eat because I just couldn't tell what I would be able to keep down. Luckily I live in Bristol so I had shops that I could get to easily to choose from a variety.

    I found the cyclizine didn't work but my friend told me about a tablet that you put between your top lip and your gum and it dissolves. I can't remember the name but I tried it and it really helped for a few weeks. You put one in there twice a day and it dissolves over about 15 minutes, tastes a bit bitter but it definitely quelled the nausea almost instantly for a few hours. Ask your GP for the dissolving anti nausea medication that's sage in pregnancy and they'll know what it is.

    Hopefully your sickness will start to subside in the next few weeks. The other bit of advice id give is just throw up if you need to. I found that if I just set myself up by the toilet and let it out then I'd get some relief for a few hours. I was so scared of puking that I was actually making myself sicker in a way.

    All the best and good luck, I know what you're going through and it will all be worth it in the end xxx

  • I suffered Hyperemesis with my first two pregnancies. One loss and one live baby. Its horrendous. It was over 10 years ago now, but you have my full and utter sympathy.

    I would complain about your treatment. Do you have an early pregnancy unit? I used to be expected to contact them and they would test my urine for ketones, to check for dehydration. If I was +++ then they would admit me for rehydration.

    Cyclizine is usually the "starter" drug then they move you up to something else, usually bucostem or ondansetron. The drugs they use to treat HG are safe in pregnancy.

    I once had a (male) GP snigger at me and tell me that "If you are old enough to get pregnant, you are old enough to deal with the a bit of sickness!" Now I know better, and I put my foot down the second time. Look up hyperemesis groups in the UK who will be able to advise you further as to services in your own area. Good luck.

  • Ginger biscuits arement to help with sicknesses they helped with my boys but not with my daughter I had morning sickness from six weeks right through with my daughter and nothing helped you tried travel sickness tablets an hour before each meal or the travel sickness bands thats all I was advised by doctors worth a try x

  • If you are still not well and gp is being useless and midwife is not bothering, ring 111. The out of hours doctors. They can't ignore you. Especially if you can't eat or drink properly because of sickness. That's no way good for you or baby. Hope things get sorted. Plus report the midwife. Unless it's an emergency she shouldn't just cancel. If she can't be there another midwife should cover for her. Good luck Hun. Xx

  • Try not to worry to much it is your hormones all over the place. Make a appointment with your GP and he will refer you to the right person. Good luck with that and also for your sickness you should try eating dry crackers or crystallized ginger from the health shop Doreen xx

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