Older mums advice please

Hi I am 46 and just had baby number 3, have a 17 and 13 year old aswell.

It took nearly 4 years and 3 miscarriages before my daughter arrived and I am keen tohave one more but obviously very awatre that age my no longer be on my side. This is why the GPs did nothing to help me conceive this last child nor investigated the reasons for the late miscarriages. (not detected until 12 week scans).

Does anyone have any experience of getting pregnant after 46, I know a break would be most sensible but as I think that you are most fertile just after having had a baby part of me thinks I should just go for it in case my time runs out, if I wait a year for examaple. Any advice?

4 Replies

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  • Just to give you the correct information regarding your gp... As you seem somewhat disappointed with them. The NHS (not your gp personally) will not investigate for miscarriages if you already had 3 full term pregnancies (hence the underlying issue will not be your health) , and the NHS will not fund fertility treatment for a patient above 39, or for patient who already has a child. These are funding guidelines out of the GPs hands.

  • Hi there's lots of women on fertility network on this site, who are mid-late 40s trying. They are all lovely and got me through lots of dark months 56 in fact ttc 😊 Come over and say hello xx

  • hi didn't just want to read and run. Not much advice here apart from what you know already, most fertile straight after baby and that it can a long time to conceive so better get going! I would not wait for a year since it will reduce your chances of conceiving by simply getting older. I am 43 and currently expecting. It took us about 18mths and one miscarriage (at least) to conceive. I am still very early on so things can still go wrong. All very scary and uncertain. I used ovulation sticks at the end to conceive. Have you used them? They are supposed to detect when you are the most fertile thus giving you a window to have sex and be successful. I used a stick every day because I could not detect any hormones the days I was supposed to use the sticks. Cost me an arm and a leg but detected ovulation at a time when according to packaging and internet I was not supposed to ovulate and ended up conceiving the first month of using them. The same happened when trying for the baby before. My husband and I had just had sex at the wrong time of the month. Should have used the ovulation sticks earlier with this pregnancy and we probably would not have had ttc for 18 months but was very worried about another pregnancy and being in my forties. The NHS doesn't do anything about these early miscarriages by the way because they are most likely the result of pregnancies which were simply not viable. This is sadly more common the older you are because the quality of our eggs is no longer top notch. Basically, your body decides that the pregnancy is simply not going to be successful and decides to abandon. However, this happens with younger women all the time as well. The first trimester is the time it is most common to happen. Hope this helps.

  • Oh WOW congratulations on your new baby 🎉🎉

    You have given me fresh hope 🙌🏽 My husband and I have been trying for 3 and a half years... basically since we got married. I'm 45... I have two girls aged 20 and 18 from a previous relationship and my husband has a 13 year old son that lives with us whom I treat as my own.

    I would definitely say try for your new baby asap... as you're at your most fertile right now and it may be harder to conceive if you leave it a while.

    Is there anything specific you did or did not do to get pregnant?? I'd almost given up... but your post has bought a smile to my face. Would really appreciate any advice... if you have any to share

    xxx

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