8 weeks pregnant and feel so horrible. - Pregnancy and Par...

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8 weeks pregnant and feel so horrible.

sunshinegigi profile image
30 Replies

Hi everyone, im 8 weeks pregnant. I have 3 children an 1 in heaven. This is a planned pregnancy as I really want another baby. I was so excited when I was sure I was pregnant but now the tiredness and sicness has kicked in and I am feeling realy low. Who ever I talk to makes me feel like I should have expected this as its not my first pregnancy. Even my GP and midwife wernt supportive. I just need to let it out, I kno no one can make it better. I am finding pregnancy difficult, I cant cook and always feel sick. I cant eat but hunger makes sickness worse so I have to try to have something that wont make me feel sick. This is so difficult and I have to put together meals for the kids and husband. I have no energy and my sense of smell is heightened so everything smells and make me sick. The house gets messy and im findin it difficult to get up and tidy. I have no family that can help. Even if some one brought round a plate of food, it would be so helpful. But I have no support. Its harder than I thought it would be. I dont know how im going to get through this. Thank you for listening.

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sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi
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30 Replies
LauraM35 profile image
LauraM35

Oh darling, it sounds like you've got the weight of the world on your shoulders. It's difficult at the best of times managing a house, a marriage and young family without being sick and pregnant on top! Be kind to yourself and make sure you take time to rest. Not everything is a priority - if the house isn't cleaned for a day (or even a fortnight!) it doesn't really matter. Have you talked to your husband about how you feel? Can he help out more around the house and with the cooking? How old are your other children - could they have some chores to do to help out? Could you afford to get some help in - a cleaner/ironer once a week perhaps? Have you tried online food shopping and getting it delivered to save time and the stress of the supermarket shop? If you haven't got family nearby, what about friends or people you know through community groups, church etc. Many people are willing to help with a cooked meal etc if they know you're in need. Most importantly, remember that how you're feeling now will pass. Be kind to yourself and ask for support from your husband and friends and make sure your GP and midwife listen to you next time you see them. Every pregnancy is different and they should be listening and supporting you through this. Take care. xx

purplerooster23 profile image
purplerooster23 in reply to LauraM35

Laura said it perfectly, just take it one day at a time.

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi in reply to LauraM35

Thank you so much for taking the time out to read my post and replying. Its so nice to hear some kind words. I ask the kids to help where they can but my husband is usually tired after work and just says eat to keep your energy up. The GP and midwife just look at my face until I stop talking. The very few friends I have are usually busy with their own lives. Iv just put the fone down after a 2 minute conversation with a friend, shes busy so couldnt talk I feel so alone right now. I really hope this horrible feeling passes and I get my energy back.

Loopy-1066 profile image
Loopy-1066 in reply to sunshinegigi

You're not alone. I have felt so sick and relate to everything you said. I also get migraines and can't take my medication any more, and hunger and sickness is therefore much worse. I advise Being a little more selfish and demanding , as it's fair enough in the current situation. Good luck x

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi in reply to LauraM35

I thought ill try online grocery shopping like you suggested. I placed my order last night and I can honestly say I would definately do it again. It was so much easier and I chose some different cereals to try and different flavoured juices. I hope the delivery arrives okay and I dont end up with substitues or anything. I do shop online alot for clothes, toys etc but not groceries though. I dread going out these days I get tired so easily. Thanks for the advice x

roxannacar profile image
roxannacar

Just a practical solution in terms of sickness. If hunger makes thing worse try keep a stash of easy access food, I found bananas great for this.

KellyTrip profile image
KellyTrip

I know how you feel. I am pregnant with my second baby and I feel so much worse than I did the first time around. I feel sick all day and quite often am sick so I am scared to do anything, even worries me at work as only my boss knows. I go to bed as soon as my son does. I can't believe I have another 6 weeks of it. Thankfully I have my husband for support but he works shifts so it's hard sometimes. Do you have family who can help?

Try not to worry about how clean the house iso etc. Once you are through this first period your energy levels should be back. Easier said than done I know!!

KellyTrip profile image
KellyTrip in reply to KellyTrip

Sorry I missed the bit where you said you didn't have family who could help so thst was a silly question!

Hi, I am so sorry you feel like this. I had very extreme sickness, all the way through my 3rd pregnancy with my son. There is a medical term for it. I became dehydrated and needed to go to hospital. It does get you so down and nobody understands. I managed to eventually find one doctor who would listen and he found high levels of keytones /dehydration in my urine and sent me to hospital. I was put on a drip. So please please retry and tell them you are feeling like this. I couldn't keep water down or anything. I recently found out they can prescribe a few different things for it and it made me so mad! I was never told and lost weight. My heart goes out to you it's absolutely awful and the worst thing ever as you just can't function at all. One thing that did help sometimes though was ice lollies. If I couldn't keep water down I would suck these help. Hopefully for you it will just be a first term pregnancy thing and go, I hope so. Tell your GP you are feeling lethargic and down and you can't keep anything down though it's worth a try.Pregnancy is so tough. I am currently pregnant with my 4th with severe SPD and can't do much around the house, also have gestational diabetes and have to inject insulin. Even with that though the extreme sickness and SPD with my 3rd was way worse. Is there anyone at all you could ask to help? Maybe you could ask someone to batch cook a meal for you then you could freeze it for the kids? Take care x

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi

Thank you to each and every one of you for taking time out to read my post and replying. I really appreciate all the advice you are giving me, you are amazing, wonderful ladies. I hope things get better for you if you are still struggling. I feel better knowing I can let it all out without being made to feel its my own fault and I should expect this. Thank you ChrisWest for offering to come and help me, you are so kind, you are a gem but I dont live in Yorkshire. I really appreciate it though. My husband also thought I was faking to get out of chores and cooking, he thinks its my job and I have to do it. My mother in law has said im lazy n dont do anything, even though she chose to stay with us during my previous pregnancy despite knowing how difficult things got for me. This meant extra cooking washing ironing etc. That didnt seem to bother her she would still remind me of the things that i needed to do. No body else understands, my mothers friend even said I should get my act together otherwise my husband might leave me! I am also glad I came across this website, I can finally talk to people who understand.

KellyTrip profile image
KellyTrip in reply to sunshinegigi

This is really sad. I find it hard to see how your mother in law can think those things having gone through pregnancy herself. Maybe she has forgotten or didn't have symptoms as badly. We have chosen not to tell anyone until after the scan and it's very hard to hide the symptoms! I seem like a moody cow to people I am sure! You can always rant on here and there will be someone to listen (well read)!

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi in reply to KellyTrip

It is so difficult hiding it from people who you dont want to tell yet. With previous pregnancies I do lose weight and my face starts looking gaunt n pale, thats when some people can predict im pregnant! I have had people ask me if im pregnant when im not, just because I looked paler than usual.

in reply to sunshinegigi

I am so sorry. I was in a similar situation and found out my husband was going to my mother in law and saying he did loads and I was lazy. Had his entire family attack me all over facebook was so embarrassing. It took me a very long long time to forgive my husband for that! Especially because if he gets a spot on his arm he has leaporacy or something haha! It caused emence stress in our relationship and I ended up going to some scans on my own. These people just don't understand at all and have a)never experienced pregnancy or b)been lucky enough to have easy pregnancies. I totally get you and how you feel. It's as if the world is rushing by and you are stuck in this limbo of feeling terrible. But there are ladies who understand and have been through the same. You are not lazy, you are not a bad parent or wife you are just having a really rough pregnancy x

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi in reply to

Thanks for sharing your experience. Its so horrible of them to attack you like that! Thats terrible. With my first pregnancy we were actually living with my inlaws which was awful. My inlaws all seem to have had easy pregnancies with really supportive husbands. I was labelled the lazy one. I felt like I was in the big brother house, my every move was monitered and I got criticised for everything, what I ate, what I wore even what time I woke up. I remember nibbling on biscuits as thats all I could eat and the next day they were gone!

in reply to sunshinegigi

Thanks, this was 6 years ago now my husband hasn't spoken to them since. I didn't make him do that but I think it was the way they all ganged up on me and what was said he couldn't forgive. That sounds like a nightmare situation. Think some mums get jealous when their sons meet a lady they settle down with which is a little weird, it's more about another female having a big influence on them than anything else though. You can't do anything right with people like that. The nastiness usually does stem from the mum. I'd like my son to shoot me if I ever ended up like that haha. I don't get it. I would help out as much or as little as needed in every way x

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi in reply to

You are right, there is definately jealousy there. The odd thing is, they speak to him fine but wont to me. I dont know what im supposed to have done wrong.

in reply to sunshinegigi

Sounds as if you haven't done anything. It's not so much about you it's about who you are to him if that makes sense. He probably could have got with a saint and they would find fault in her. My in-laws were the same. X

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi in reply to

I wish I had the confidence to put them in their place. They will find anything as an excuse to put me down. They are just pathetic.

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi

I would complain to my husband but he wouldnt take me seriously. I continued being the door mat. I hope things are better this time.

Baby24 profile image
Baby24

Hi! I'm 7 and half weeks pregnant and have the same nausea and vomiting. I tried a new thing today that a pharmacist advised, it was to try and eat raw almonds and cucumbers, I know it sounds crazy but I think it actually helped a little I still felt very nauseous this morning and it's come back now but for a good couple of hours during the day I actually felt a bit "normal"!

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi in reply to Baby24

Thats great to hear somethings helped you feel better. Ill try anything! I thought id try an orange yesterday but regreted it straight after. I envy women who dont get sickness and nausea, there are some lucky ones who dont!

Baby24 profile image
Baby24 in reply to sunshinegigi

I know!! My mum was one who didn't get any nausea or anything!! I haven't told her I'm pregnant yet, she coming to visit my husband and me in 2 weeks, I want to surprise her then!! I would stay away from oily, citrus, milky foods. I'm have plain toast most of the time, I dream about being able to stomach foods like protein and fruit!!

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi in reply to Baby24

My mother had alot of sickness during her pregnancies, maybe thats why Im getting it. Its hard finding anything I can eat. Everything smells so strong aswell. I can smell things I wouldnt usually smell. Opening the fridge makes me so sick.

pringvic78 profile image
pringvic78

Bless you, im 12 weeks, finding things very hard, its not easy, everyone is different, if you ever need someone to talk to ill be hear to listen for you, i really hope things get better.

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi in reply to pringvic78

Thank you for offering to listen. It gets so hard, I hope things get better for you too. I would have upto 3 mugs of tea before I was pregnant, but now I cant stand the taste. It tastes so sickly and not the same as it did. So the sudden caffiene withdrawal is giving me major headaches. Its so hard to do anything. I have to take my youngest to nursery in a while but dont have the energy. I find the morning sessions he has more difficult though as im a zombie in the mornings!

pringvic78 profile image
pringvic78 in reply to sunshinegigi

The mornings are hard, iv a 3 year old at nursery, i just cant sleep at night so the mornings are tough, im also working 4 days a week and finding it hard to keep up with it, i just cant afford to leave, the babys dad has also left me so no help there, i just keep hoping things get better, im keeping strong for my little boy but its so hard.....

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi in reply to pringvic78

I feel upset knowing you are struggling alone, I wish things get easier for you I really do. I will keep you in my prayers, I hope you find strengh and get your energy back. Things must be so much more difficult without your partner with you. Try to keep strong, I know its easier said than done. This difficult time has to pass. Thinking of you xx

C_bee profile image
C_bee

This is exactly how I feel. I'm seven weeks pregnant, other than my partner no one else knows. This is my first pregnancy and is planned. I remember feeling so happy when I found out. Being sick and feeling overly tired were the first signs I was pregnant. I was completely fine after being sick - no headache, dizziness etc. I waited a few days after my missed period before taking a test to confirm. Initially, I just was tired all the time. Then the nausea crept in and now the vomiting. At first my partner was extremely supportive but now he's convinced I'm forcing the vomiting. I struggle to do much at all. I feel useless.

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi in reply to C_bee

Before I found this website, I didnt know anyone who felt this way during pregnancy. Everyone I spoke to had hardly any vomiting. My mum was the only one who understood, but she doesnt live local to us. I ask my 2 older children to help when they can. Every little they do is helpful as I cant do much. Is there anyone who could help you out now and again? I have no one else nearby to help. I cant cook so I order foods to be delivered. Its not the healthiest option but its alli can do until i feel better. I recently ordered groceries online, it was less stressful than going out to buy them. Is that something you would consider? Try to eat and drink what you can, its hard but maybe theres a food you crave or a food that you wouldnt normaly try but could try. I hope you feel better soon and get your energy back x

sunshinegigi profile image
sunshinegigi

Thats so good to hear you are feeling great! Its such an amazing feeling when you notice flutters/movents for the first time. I keep telling myself I have a small bump but I think iv always had the belly pre pregnancy lol. It was nice reading your your post, I suddenly felt a bit of excitment looking forwad to feeling those flutters and having a proper bump! and feeling abit more normal lol

All you ladies are amazing, you are all so strong and I wish you the best of luck during your pregnancies xx

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