Upset moving baby to her own room

Hi all, just looking for a bit of advice. My little girl is 13 weeks old and she has just been moved to a cot because she is just moving around too much in her Moses basket to be safe. We set up her cot in her own room and I've had it all decorated and prepared for ages but I have stayed in the room with her since starting to put her down, she doesn't need me as she sleeps fine in the day and even when I stay up later while she's asleep, I just don't feel ready to leave her yet. My partner is a lorry driver so has starts was early as 2am and I would feel bad having her in the room as sometimes she does wake but soothes herself back to sleep or I'll have to rock her and don't want him missing out on any more sleep. I'm also just so scared that something will happen to her if I'm not in the room, had a very scary pregnancy where we weren't sure if she would make it as I had health issues and surgeries and now I don't want to leave her side. I feel bad not sleeping in the bed with my partner because it's like we are always apart now and I know couples need there alone time but I'm just so worried something will happen if I'm not here. Any advice would be appreciated, sorry for the essay as it's mostly rambling on

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  • Your baby is 13 weeks old, in my opinion babies need to share the same room as their parents until a year old. I appreciate that this differs from individual to individual. I don't want to be too honest here. You are not ready from what you have written, So why go through it? Your partner has to sacrifice and share you with the baby. They grow up so quickly. My 22 months old was still in our bed until recently/ king size bed but we had to move as She moves like a clock. She is too big for her cot and we are both not ready to send her to another room. I start the night with my husband after the hugs and what not if we are not tired I go to the baby. When am next to her she is content and sleeps right thru. My hubby also wakes up at 5 am as his shift starts very early. He bought the double Z- bed from ebay as it temporary arrangement. It is working for us. Every one is happy. I have 4 kids and have never sent them to their own room until way later. I appreciate every family is different. You are not ready and your baby is way too young. Trust your instincts and find a different way. Kids grow so quick and deserve to be put first. Before you know it she will be talking and walking. Sorry in advance if I offended you.

  • Sorry I did not finish writing. I sleep with my baby on a double Z- bed next to my husband. It folds easy in the daytime to become a seat. My baby is happy and doesn't wake up at all. This arrangement is fantastic for us for at least a few months more. She was jumping off the bed too. This is safe as its too low and comfortable. Works for us. Happy baby and happy family. The other Sisters are 5, 9 and 20. Keeping them next to you until you are both ready will not create any problems in the future. We have done it several times and the 5 year old just left at 2 years to share with 1 sister. Wishing you well.

  • Thank you for your reply, at the moment I'm in a single bed in her room which is so comfortable it's actually better than my bed haha. My partner understands that I might not be ready so isn't trying to get me to move back to the other room. I think if he had a different job I would move back in with the cot to our room but because he is driving heavy goods vehicles on sometimes 5/6 hours sleep i think taking away from what little sleep he gets could put others at risk if he is too tired on the road. I think maybe I'm just overthinking it, I was planning on changing her to the room at 6 months because I think that's usually a good time, I think I'm just going to carry on sleeping in her room with her for now, maybe try spend a hour extra with my partner before bed so I don't feel like I miss him too much and just see how I get on, it's only been a week I guess and it's just taking time to get used to it all. Don't know how some parents do this at a few weeks old, I'd have a panic attack haha.thank you again for your advice ๐Ÿ˜Š

  • I can't really give advice on this as my son co slept until he was 8 months and then half the night after that until about a year. I just wanted to say that I understand how you feel. I felt so sad when we first put my son in his room. I felt lost without him there. It's a very normal feeling!

  • Thank you, you do get used to them being there and hearing every little sound so it just doesn't seem normal. I'll carry on with sleeping in with her for now and then can gradually leave as she becomes older I think, she has her daytime naps in there alone so that's something. Thank you again for your support ๐Ÿ˜Š

  • I think it really is your choice if you want to share a room of not. In general I think the advice is to wait till they are 6 months. If you do want to move back to your room have you considered a monitor with camera? Or one that has a breathing sensor? The breathing sensor do sometimes go off more than they should (false alarms) so I'd have a good look at reviews. I do have one but never used the breathing sensor mode ๐Ÿ˜–

  • I have a monitor and everything so I think I'll just stay in there until I feel comfortable and then I have the monitors for when I'm ready to leave her alone in there, thank you for your advice ๐Ÿ˜Š

  • I am glad that you are staying in the same room as your baby and also working out what is good for the whole family. Your husband needs his sleep to be safe on the road definitely and you will have to divide the time between baby and Dad. I have never used a camera or any technology as I don't trust them. So long as I cuddle and hug my husband for the first hour of the night that keeps everyone happy and then go to baby for the rest of the night. Like I said its temporary and they grow up so quickly honestly. Trust your instincts and do what feels right for you and your family. ๐Ÿ˜Š

  • How about moving baby back into your room and on nights that your husband is working he could sleep in the single bed in your baby's room and on other nights you can still share a bed.... that way baby is always with you at night but you can also be with your husband on nights when his sleep isn't as essential xx

  • Yeah that could work, I'll suggest that and see what he thinks about it, thank you ๐Ÿ˜Š

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