Niamh is now 11 months and I'm starting to get really anxious about her turning 1! How daft is that!!? I cry at nearly everything, hate leaving her to go to work, want to cuddle her all the time, miss the breastfeeding (is it possible to start producing milk again after 6 months of not breastfeeding?), and just don't feel myself. the gp has told me it's all normal and will get easier, and now Niamh is sleeping better (only waking occasionally at the mo) I should sleep better. But no, I'm having nasty nightmares about having the house broken into and that I can't get to her quick enough to protect her. im waiting for the health visitor to get in touch to see what she says.
Has anyone else has anything similar? I've had ups and downs through pregnancy and after having her but this has come on incredibly quickly, in the last week all of a sudden.
Any advice would be great! Thanks. X
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LottyB
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4 Replies
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Ah bless you, poor thing!!! I def found things more difficult when I went back to work as I work 5 days which constantly made me question whether that made me a good mother. On my lunch break instead of enjoying eating my lunch in peace I'd wander round the shops watching other mummies with their babies and wishing I was at home with my son. I found I was almost pleased when he woke in the night so we could enjoy cuddles and kisses with no one else around. It sounds bizarre now but that's how I felt.
I'm not sure if any of these things are similar to what you're feeling but it did get better and we learnt to enjoy time away from each other and make the most of our time together 😊. There are still days when I drag myself to work wishing I was staying home with my 'baby' (he's 2!) but I know he's a happy, confident, cared for little boy so I don't worry as much. Hope that helps and well done you talking to your GP and HV about it - we don't ask for help enough in my opinion. Feel better soon xx
I had such a fight with my work about getting part time hours that I think that ruined my last few months of mat leave. 😕
I think she's just changing so fast I'm scared of missing first steps and things. She loves the childminder, actually starts clapping her hands when we pull into the drive way which is lovely and reassuring.
I don't like the night wakings anymore but I used to love them when she was tiny and I would be feeding her when the sunwas coming up. It was perfect. 😍
Thanks for your advice. It has made me feel a bit better. 😊
I had (and still do have!) a terrible time leaving my LG. I feel like I should be with her all the time, and that's only natural. I just have to reassure myself that it's all for her, and also that daughters of working mothers have been proven to be more successful professionally 😊
Re the breastfeeding, relactation is absolutely possible, and if you really want to start again (by the sounds of it you do) then it should definitely work for you. Once a woman has lactated, she can resume this at any point in her life. There are cases of grandmothers relactating to feed their grandchildren in the absence of the mother! Our bodies are amazing 😊 the problem is that there is very little knowledge out there about it, especially with health professionals. Look it up online and if you need any guidance feel free to PM me ☺ but in the meantime, start pumping and attach Niamh to stimulate your flow and to get her used to it again. The more you do this the quicker your milk will come back. Eat lots of oats too ☺.
Thankyou! It is really hard. I nearly didn't go back to work as I just wanted to squeeze her and snuggle all day (I know that's not possible all the time but it was a nice thought!) And as I've said in my earlier reply my work were being difficult in regards to going back part time.
I didn't know that about breastfeeding! Thankyou, if I could even just do the bedtime feed again I think that would make me feel a bit better again as once I got the supply sorted when she was born I really enjoyed it most of the time.
😊 thanks again. Your advice has helped me feel better. Xx
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