Age gaps and potty training

[JNDuce12-13]

Age gaps; my little boy is 16months and we know we want another baby but due t wanting a career change it seems an either now or 6yrs away when I'm qualified. Money etc... Isn't an issue its what I can cope with that worries me. So what do you guys say is a good age gap and why? My partners point of view is lesser of an age gap with him and his sister having 8years between them and not being close at all. And my dad had no siblings and is adiment we need more lol

Potty training; what age can you realistically start potty training or is it down to what your child can understand? And how can you help them to understand? Like I said my child is 16months and I'm not thinking it's going to happen anytime soon but Id like to know how I help him train early and help him understand

Thank you xxx

[Curlyk250]

Hi, I thought I always wanted my babies close together, as it turns out, there is a 4 year age gap between mine ( eldest just turned 4, new baby due in 2weeks) and on reflection about coping it works for me. The eldest is independent, ie can dress, toilet, brush teeth, eat, play by herself which will give me some breathing space to deal with new baby, and she currently goes to nursery 2 days and will be starting school in Sep.

I imagine the "baby stage" of having close siblings is very hard and demanding For the 1st 2-3 years, then I presume it gets easier as they get older together and can play/entertain each other.

I'm not sure there is a right time, what do you feel would be the most important to you? More children or changing career, my age would affect my choice but it's up to you and what's right for you.

As for potty training, I would wait until after 2. Every child is different and all that, but like you said it's what they understand. I'm no expert really my daughter was 26 months, I had tried a couple of times prior but it didn't work. You need to pick a time where you can be at home a lot to let them roam around with no nappy on so they understand the sensations and actions of toileting, lots of praise when it goes right, and lots of patience when it doesn't.

It did also help at nursery as she was partnered with a " trained friend" and they went together. Good luck

[NCTcharity]

Here's our information on age gaps between children: nct.org.uk/parenting/age-ga...

[anniemayo]

I understand your dilemma and these things can seem overwhelming until they happen - and you just get on with it! Regarding age gaps, my siblings and I were born in 1972, 1973, 1980 (me) and 1983. There is 7 years between my sister and I and we're best friends. She's 10 years older than my younger brother and they are very close. There is then 11 years between my brothers and they're not close at all, but that is more circumstances - they are just so different. I get on brilliantly with both of my brothers. But we're a close knit family and I think that's why it works.

I always thought I would have my first two babies really close together but my boy will be 3 next week and I'm currently 15 weeks pregnant. I just wasn't ready after my son but it's working out well imo. I feel like he'll be able to help a little and we have lovely chats now so that he understands the world better.

Toilet training took ages with him. We started to familiarise him with it before he turned two (bought the potties and potty training books). I did feel under pressure to get it done. There were so many stories from other moms whose child 'potty trained themselves overnight' or just seemed to 'get it' straight away.

We tried several times but he just didn't seem confident enough. He goes to Nursery and it was getting me down that he wasn't doing it like the rest of the children, so we stopped. That was the best decision I could have made. In the last week, he suddenly is ready! It's great as he really wants to do it now and he's much more confident. Don't be pressured by stories. Some will take to it straight away, and some not. Every child is different. It's not like they'll still need nappies when they're 10

I think whatever you decide it will be the right decision, as it means you're ready for the fun and challenges that lie ahead. How you are as a family should help in how well your children get along.