Advice please!!!

My lo is 8 weeks and overall she's pretty happy chilled out baby during the day she only crys if she needs something. On a night once shes in bed she wakes once for a feed and bum change but usually no more than that. But I realy struggle to get her down on a night I try routine bath n feed at 7pm then dark quite room she usually falls asleep after her feed but soon as I attempt to put her in her bed shes wide awake screaming her head off im then attempting to settle her for hours usually goes down anywhere between 10.30pm and 1am please can anyone give me any ideas on how to get ger to settle sooner x

35 Replies

  • Does she pull her legs up like she has tummy ache or trapped wind? Or is it more being put down that she isn't happy with? If she looks like she is in pain with wind or tummy ache, it could be colic, so you could try giving her infacol or another colic remedy. If you think it's because she isn't happy being put down, you could try swaddling so she still feels like she is being held? My little boy had both colic and didn't like being put down! Swaddling worked a treat but he very quickly became too strong and escaped!! Eventually, he just accepted it and went straight to sleep! Lol x

  • A mixture of both I think sometimes she grimaces like she has trapped wind I have tried infacol which didn't seem to work n gripe water which she either spits out or makes her throw up. not sure what to try now she will literally on off scream n squirm around for hours!then when she does settle starts all over again when I try n put her down was going to buy a swaddle blanket as tried swaddling her in her blanket n she just kicked it off have u tried one? R they any good?

  • Colief is great for colic..expensive but gd x

  • Dentinox goes in the milk. I use infacol during the day and dentinox in the evening and at night. It works a treat

  • I see, infacol helped us but only for a couple of weeks. Many people swear by coleif. As ceribean says, very expensive but Maybe give it a try? It actually didn't work for us though! :( are you breast or bottle feeding? At first we swaddled with a blanket but then we got Hugo a swaddle shell. It was great and I didn't worry about him wriggling and flinging a blanket over his face like I did with the blanket. Swaddling is supposed to help with colic too. As for routine, you do right trying to get her into one, I was very dubious at first, trying to do it so young but now the routine is so well established, life is so easy! I found it impossible to do when breastfeeding though as his colic was so bad, he would literally scream from 4pm to 3amand that would be a good night!! :( some ladies on here have had an easier time with bf and managed to get into sa routine. Every baby is so different!! Persist with the routine if you can, the earlier you do it, the easier it will be when they are older and I feel you need to take that control and get your evenings back! The first full week Hugo went down at 7pm and stayed asleep was bliss! Knowing my husband and I could enjoy a HOT dinner together :) xx

  • Try dentinox it works wonders for my littln. Also I would defo try swaddling I still do with mine and shes 13 weeks swaddle her when you try getting her to sleep she wull feel cuddled and secure as long as you put her down the some way as your holding hershe should stay asleep you could also try warming the mattress with a water bottle before laying her down ao it's warm

  • Hey, Are you trying to get her down much earlier then in past weeks? Does she nap in the day? Nap well?

    My HV really wants me to get my LO into routine at 7pm to go to bed but he's just too wired. He doesn't sleep well in the day then gets over tired and it becomes a fight unless I boob him to sleep and even then it's not always as simple as just putting him down as he's quite often in a REM sleep.

    He's a cluster feeder so I tend to do the Bath, PJ feed thing at 7 and then he would feed feed feed all evening and when he started to became nosy about surroundings I starting taking him into quiet darkened bedroom to feed to sleep instead about 10pm, it is the 'quiet feed' & it's been working for me, he knows that when i bring him in its, bum, sleeping bag, feed, sleep & he'd be asleep by 10.45. I have tried to bring this forward by simply taking him to bed earlier and it worked for a few nights, starting instead 9pm, I had him in bed asleep for 10pm but now getting conflicting info. HV is saying bedtime routine bed 7pm/put to bed then dream feed 10-11pm (not all babies dream feed) & the Breast Feeding Counsellors says, inch it forward night by night by say 15mins a night.

    The way I see it if he wants to cluster feed all evening how am I going to get him to sleep at this age (11weeks) She also mentioned that some cultures baby goes to bed when parents do but that's obviously a lifestyle thing as they don't worry about a baby free evening.

    This is probably not helping you too much. Do you think your expecting too much for her age? I don't know as so many factors to take into account.

    Have you looked at the 'EASY Routine' by baby whisperer?

    Last night we tried to putting him down awake after feed to self settle and an hour later still awake despite a number of reassuring visits in. In the end I picked up my baby popped him of boob, within minutes he was asleep. Will try again tonight. He's sleeping around 7hrs then picks up a few more after big kip X

  • It's hard but it only lasts a short time, go with what works for you. Take what advice you like and discard the rest. You will have baby free evenings at some time in the future, but make the most of those lovely baby cuddles now, they grow up so fast!

  • Hi she naps well in the day just evenings she will not settle I have always done her bath at 7pm n then just circle of feeding n tryin to comfort her! I will have a look at that book I haven't heard of it b4 x

  • I used swaddle wraps that had Velcro to secure them, they were fab, worked brilliantly for us and will be using them again for baby number 2. Your baby is still very new to this world and it does take some adjusting. You will work out a routine eventually, don't stress about it, it doesn't matter if you don't get it right straight away. Enjoy your little


  • Your baby's behaviour sounds very normal. Colic relief medications haven't been proved to work, though many parent swear by them. Feed & cuddle (or use a sling) through the evening, this period will soon pass.

  • Hey my baby was similar at that age....he didn't scream but he certainly wouldn't go down at a decent hour. When he did though, he'd sleep through. Anyway, I carried on his routine as usual and as he's got older he has wanted bed earlier himself. He's 12 weeks and goes to bed generally between 9.30 and 10.30 which I'm happy with for now. I'm sure as he gets older and is able to do even more, he'll sleep earlier still as they take on more and get worn out. seems to be a natural progression :-) x

  • Thanks is good to know this is normal I just wish there was some pattern to it she seemed to be going down round 10.30-11ish most nights but the last few nights its been more like 1am I cant think of anything thats changed so dnt no y? Never mind sure we will get there :)

  • James was up and down for no apparent reason last night out of the blue...not sure if he's coming down with something but no obvious symptoms yet if so. Babies are right little teases lol x

  • My son who is nearly 12 weeks was the same but we go to bed at 9..the days tht we do more I.e baby groups he is more willing to settle rather than fight it but if I hav a day at home which is only about once a week he is a bit more tricky as he isnt worn out so try wearing her out..swimming works a treat. .we had our first go yesterday and we had a great sleep. X

  • Hi, Because my son fell asleep in my arms he also was waking up and screaming as soon as I was putting him to his cot. He was going to bed around 10 as well but the time was changing from time to time. Sometime if I miss the signes he doesn't want to sleep till 1am too. Just stick to the routine that you are working on, use swadling as it may make your little one feel more secure and it is good idea to take them in the afternoon for a longer walk so they get easily tired and fall asleep easier and better. Be flexible sometimes babies turn our routines up side down. Just stick to it as much as you can it will be slowly getting better as the baby will learn that there is day and night and start recognising that it is bed time soon.

  • Is she having her daytime naps in the same room/cot as she does on a night? Our daughter wouldn't sleep in her Moses basket from day dot, but was more settled in her carry cot, which went with the travel system. Although even then we would often get her down around 10pm only to have her wake up full of it at 2am. They do like to assert their individual natures! Good luck, it does improve.

  • Her daytime naps are usually in her pram as usually out and about think she has got the day/night on its head as she is very sleepy in the day and wide awake in the evenings been out today to a baby music class which she some how managed to sleep throu and woke up for a feed and change after it had done and then got up at lunch for her dinner then went straight back to sleep even thou I tried to keep her up awake think ill be in for another long night x

  • They say sleep breeds sleep so try and stay positive. :-)

  • We shes pretty sparko as we speak so hopefully a good sign hehe :)

  • Try Gina Ford's Contented Little Baby book. Very strict routines but has worked wonders for us. We had a nightmare until I read this book, he was sleeping all night within a week! My little man is 10 months now and he is like clockwork in everything he does and such a happy little chap. Good luck, things will get better. X

  • That woman!!! I'd like her to write a book about raising children once she's actually had one!!!

  • Only a suggestion. Gina Ford has a lot of hands on experience with babies. There are lot of mothers that I certainly would not take advice from! If advice came from a Martian and worked I'd take it!

  • I'm glad it works for you. Definitely not for me and my baby. I won't even read that whole book. I like looking at my baby after 10pm lol x :-)

  • Gina Ford seems to be like Marmite - people either love or hate her. Glad you found something that works for you, and don't listen to the haters - it's completely your choice at the end of the day.

  • Yh I'm a hater of that stuff ...but I supported her choice

  • Iv never heard of Gina Ford but definetly agree with scoffcat if u like it and works for u then go with it! :)

  • I know, didn't realise Gina Ford was a dirty word! Anyway lets hope Louise's little one gets to sleep easier either way x

  • Agreed. .whats best for one isnt best for another....I kno plenty of women (my god mother) who dont have children but shes great with children. .she takes care of my son..just coz someone doesn't have children doesn't mean they r clueless x

  • Yh definitely. My choice won't always match others and vice versa. I find the routine too rigid....I don't even do well with that sort of thing for myself haha! x

  • Guessing she's not written books on the topic though...

  • She puts far too much pressure on new mums to be some kind of Mary Poppins figure of perfection. I wonder how many cases of PND she has fuelled?

  • Mary poppins is my favourite film..b quite cool to do those things

  • Yeh I dont even hav a routine. .apart frm showering and eating at some point in my day lol x

  • Lol yep that's pretty much my aims for the day and everything else is a bonus haha x

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