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Feeling pretty down :(

soo we have been trying for a baby 3 years in November with still no luck :( usually I don't let it get me down as our motto is "it will happen wen its the right time" but every now an again some1 will say something or il see something and it hurts so bad.. Im currently in my 2nd year of Childcare and the other day my tutor (a male) was readin our notes on how well we done in our interviews and wen he got to me he said "can tell from her eyes how much she loves children, will make a great mammy one day" now this man barley knows me and definitely doesn't know im desperate to be a mammy, but his words, so kind, crippled me..i had a good cry wen I got home over it but its really affectin me these past few days as its the first time some1 other that my partner has told me that, so now my longing for our baby is back and im so desperate :( is it right to be feeling this way?? sorry for the rant guys just need to get it off my chest

7 Replies

have you been to see a health professional about it as there might b probs with u or ur partners reproductive bits and bobs and I believe if nothing has happened after a yr then u can get some investigation. it must be so hard when u want something so bad, and no one can say how u shud b feeling as it must b hard. I hope it happens for u really soon but maybe book an app to see ur gp x


Really feeling for you. I know it's so hard when you want it so badly. Not sure if you've seen your doctor about this - they'd be in the best position to advise, if you haven't. Do know that other people have been where you are and now have a family, so don't lose hope. Loads of love. X


Please go and see your GP straight away you both need to be investigated for fertility issues. It may be something simple or you just need a little 'help'. Our infertility was unexplained but then once we started on IVF it turned out my hormone levels were low & my womb lining wasn't thick enough to implant successfully. Lots of progesterone & oestrogen later and I'm now 14+3 :-D Good luck x


I completely understand how you are feeling.

I was 25 when me and my OH started trying TC. Silly me though because I was young, I did exercise and ate healthy I would be pregnant in no time... How wrong I was. It got to 6 months

and still not pregnant, I started to feel down but I knew you had to be trying over a year before going to the doctor so I decided to try and get even healthier by cutting out a lot of processed foods, cooking everything from scratch with organic produce. Anything that was not good for TTC me or my OH did not eat or do. I started yoga to relax, and religiously did ovulating tests. As you can probably guess a year arrived and i was still not pregnant. off to the doctors we went, only to be told I was young and healthy and that I was probably stressed about the situation which is why it wasn't happening and got sent home. My OH did get a few sperm samples done along the way but the results were all fine (although the count went up every time due to eating Brazil nuts and drinking pineapple juice)

Anyhow another few months passed and we decided to go down the IVF route, self funded because of my age again the NHS would not pay. 1 fresh cycle and 1 frozen cycle with 2 embryos left from the fresh both failed. By this point I didn't think I could continue. I thought I would never be a mum and it seemed wherever I looked there were pregnant women or babies in prams. I was devastated.

A few months passed and we decided to try, but start living our lives again. It had gotten so regimented it was like a job. I started to have acupuncture and the lady doing it really encouraged me to keep pestering the doctor to look into my fertility. After a few visits I finally got a referral to the hospital, who decided to do a laparoscopy to look for endometriosis. (I remembered reading somewhere a lady had a laparoscopy and it seemed to wake up her reproductive system.) so... no endometriosis was found and didn't have any cysts, nothing.

What now??? Game over???

1 month after my laparoscopy I had a positive pregnancy test, the best Christmas present I could have wished for!

Right now I am sitting here writing this post aged 29 with my 10 week old baby asleep on my chest. It has been a long hard journey but please don't loose heart.

Keep going to your doctor until they agree to investigate every avenue for you and your OH

I wish you all the best x

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Thanks for your replies guys, much appreciated.. Haven't been to docs as i am also young, and me an my partner are healthy, and in afraid doc will just tell me to keep trying. IM not going to give up hope, we are still young but i so want a little baby to call my own. I think its about time i bit the bullet and went to docs , the worst he can do is turn me away without tests


Please don't give up hope, it's the worst feeling in the world when that period arrives every month, we were trying for nearly 3 years, my doctor wouldn't refer me for treatment until I've been actively trying for 2 years (not sure if this is the same everywhere) finally we had lots of test, and tried all kinds of things nothing worked, and the only reason was 'unexplained' which is more frustrating than finding out something is wrong.. Finally as we were referred for IVF after what seemed a lifetime of heartache, I found out I was pregnant now 32 weeks :) - I honestly say 'raspberry leaf tea' a few cups each day is what finally helped me. Read into it, it maybe something to try until you have the answers your looking for X


I'd definitely recommend a chat with your GP. First step will probably be a simple blood test for you and a sperm test for your partner. It could be something really simple that can be easily resolved, so well worth checking it out. After 3 years you should definitely not be turned away without tests.

We were trying for 14 months, and were waiting for an appointment at the fertility clinic when I fell pregnant. If nothing else, having tests can take the pressure off you a bit, and sometimes that's enough for things to happen on their own. All the best.


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