Birthing partner(s) !!

Hi ladies, & babies

Not sure why but i've just started to think about the use of a "Birthing partner" once in labour

Ive never considered myself to be a "ignorant woman" to it or anything but in the past when I've thought about it Ive thought "its's just a waste of extra person in the delivery room really"

Just wondering whats your thoughts on this

A part of me does sometimes think it would be nice to have someone there ( apart from the other-half) to share the whole birthing experience but then wouldn't we be then running the risk of allow or letting your other half feel left out ?

He did help you to make the child after-all :)


All responses are welcome :)

14 Replies

  • I wanted my mum with me because she knows me, knows how to keep me from killing my boyfriend if he aggravates me during labour (haha!!), has lots of experience in birth and labour...other than the midwives so i had another someone looking out for me and would be able to give my boyfriend some support if need be too.....and as it happens it was good she was there in my situation being taken away for a c section and GA to be there with him while he worried about me and James. Unfortunately I didn't get to have either of them in with me anyway :-( x

  • Haha, :)

    Yes My mother is a good "referee" at times when I'm ready to put my hands around my other-half's neck :)

    Poor guy!!

    But my mother is also the mediator to be the one to take my son home if it's a school night hence the reason why I've being thinking about the whole purpose of having a birthing partner too.

    If this child is anything like my son was I should be able to continue with having a successful VB, so hopefully wont have'to worry about being whisked off for an c-sec but who knows hey!!


  • My mum and Partner was there for all three of my other babies. This time around I am going to have a home birth so am going to have a couple of friends around whilst in labour... might make things go better, however the pushing part they can sit in the kitchen lol... x

  • Hi Abeena, are you thinking of a Doula/professional birthing partner? I have thought a lot about that because I now know some personally. I think the benefit, to my mind would be having someone else there to do some of the 'work' and for special skills like aromatherapy massage or whatever which you might want (which might be equally applicable to a non-professional friend). This potentially might free up O.H from rummaging in your bag to find the lip balm you packed/rubbing you back continuously for 6 hours/finding a midwife if you don't have one with you when you want etc to be more 'with you' in the experience. My reason for thinking about it is that I am planning another homebirth (good luck with yours BubbaG!) and have found that with all the organizing of food and drinks and other practical stuff for midwives, topping up birth pool, being around for the children when they need a parent (my mum-in-law has them) etc. my husband is really busy and I want him to be able to share all the donkey work with someone else so that I can get some cuddles and kisses too!

  • The thought of an "professional birthing partner" sounds very nice to have but I Imagine the cost of it would be quite high & if im honest I wouldn't feel comfortable in spending a large amount of money on the basis of using someone for a couple of hours.

    My OH is also very busy ( at the best of times) but I fortunately have quite alot of close family members around me should he be a Lil too far (in distance) at the time of labour.


  • My Best friend asked if she could come in I said ok but told her not to tell me I don't need pain relief or I will strangle her. .. but she isn't good with blood and stuff as she faints... she came with me to hospital when I had to have a cone biopsy for abnormal cells and before we even got into the room she was coming over all faint lol so we will see if she makes it :)

  • Haha

    Yeah, ive also got a few friends like that who would either cry their eyes out or pass out altogether. :-)

    Bless them

    My mother is definitely involved within this whole experience but id rather her be with my son should he want/need to go home.

  • Are u taking ur son with u then? X

  • Im not actually 100% sure yet as time / start of labour is so unpredictable.

    My OH does "shift" work at the moment & leaves the house very early in the mornings so if we're lucky he may be able to stay with his dad whilst me & my mum go to hospital (or visa-versa)


  • I think it's a lovely idea, but for me being my first pregnancy I want it just to be intimate between me and my OH. Hoping family will come up fairly quickly afterwards though :)

  • Hey! For me I only wanted my husband with me the thought of mum/sister/mother in law/friend in there at such a personal and graphic time just was not for me... don't get me wrong I'm mega close to mum but for us it was to be just the two of us! I didn't even want family knowing when I went into labour because I didn't want them rocking up at the hospital while it was all happening! Whatever decision you make, the most important thing us that it's what YOU want xx

  • Im not 100% sure but I think many hospital only allow up to 2 people in the delivery room at a time

    But yeah I just couldn't imagine my sister, friend , mum & OH that would just be too much


  • I'm having my sister and my husband. Me and my sister are very close and she can't have children so will be the closest she ever gets. She's also a nurse and well used to the hospital environment. I do have concerns about her taking over a bit but will be talking to both of them to make sure they are comfortable with the situation. But ultimately she knows that my OH has to be the primary birthing partner and she is there more as an onlooker!! well that's the plan anyway - it'll probably all go out the window on the day!!

  • Im giving birth without a birthing partner. Hubby will be at home looking after our 2 kids. I dont really want mum as she wasnt any use on my daughters turn. She didnt even enter the room and all she did was scream and shout. Despite this I still love her very much. I dont feel close to anyone else to ask them and I cant afford a doula. On top I am going have vbac and Im really scared as I dont want another c section.Plz ladies pray for me. As I really want a nautural birth and I will keep you lot in my prayers

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