When do you write your Birth plan and does the midwife... - NCT


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When do you write your Birth plan and does the midwife help you with this?

CheekyP profile image

I'm 38 weeks and just realised I haven't written a birth plan. My midwife has never mentioned it to me either. Is this normal? Is it expected you do it yourself or should the midwife talk to you about it? Thanks x

17 Replies

I am not writing a plan as when I make plans they go wrong or don't happen as I have learnt in last few weeks, I have ideas in mind and my boyfriend knows about these but there is a good chance that might not be able to happen so I am open to let this labour go with the flow. Obviously if u have worries or concerns then write them down and discuss with the midwife but I told my midwife the same as above and she said to me a lot of plans go out the window during birth so I am not gonna set my heart on something and get frustrated if it doesn't happen. x

Hi cheekyP

You can always ask / or mention it your midwife so she could advise you of what could be a good plan, but if Im honest most birth plans are not worth the paper their written on ( Sorry babe)

Ive heard "countless' amount of times that when mums prepare their birth plans, within hours of being in hospital in labour it all goes out the window & baby is delivered in the totally opposite way to planned.

Im not saying having a birth plan is totally useless but I think its best to keep it as minimal as possible so your not left thinking you just wasted a bunch of time.

I am due to give birth in "early november" & I'm thinking of attaching a note to the "green pregnancy notes" book about the pain relief I'd like to have this time around as when i was giving birth to my son I felt a bit out of control & as a result a bit of a horrendous birth.


My only stipulation was early skin to skin and delayed cord clamping. Personally, I think complex birth plans can adversely affect the experience you have as anything that doesn't happen can feel like a failure. Also, in my limited obstetric experience, the more complex a plan the more likely things are to go Pete...

Hey, I am 39+2 and wrote mine at the beginning of this week.

The birth plan I believe should be flexible as all hell can break loose however I feel its better to at least try to communicate your wishes, you may be one of the lucky ones :) or you may not get what you want or you have a medical emergency :( but at that time all of us will wish for safe health of mother & baby :)

Are there birth plan guidelines in the hospital notes (I have a guide in mine which I filled in)


Who you want there?

How will you manage pain in stage 1 at home?

Do you have a good understanding of pain relief available to you at the hospital as you get closer to stage 2?

Will you find out the sex yourself?

Who will cut the cord?

How will you deliver the placenta?

Will your baby have Vitamin K Injection?

Do you have any strong feelings about........Episiotomy? Induction?

Does this help? Hope am not teaching you to suck eggs?? Xx

in reply to cheekymonkey3791


Some good questions there yeah!

To my knowledge your Community midwife should be able to give you a "sort" of consent form ( at your last ante-natal appointment) which explains when the Vitamin K injection will be given to your baby ( when born)

with all the cut backs to the NHS especially in certain areas of the country it may be easier said than done these days.

cheekymonkey3791 profile image
cheekymonkey3791 in reply to

My MW did very little on this at my 38 wk appt, we went through skin to skin, breast feeding, we agreed Vit K and injection to delivery placenta to reduce risk of haemorrhage...the rest of it she said go home and complete. I have done so much reading that I feel well informed re pain control, positions to help my SPD/Pelvic Girdle, do I want a water birth and so on but still have written it down and discuss with partner so we can have a crack at the ideal :) but accept what may happen is out of our control as well.

Thanks loads everyone. I am flexible and just want to see how things go without any expectations; the main reasons I want a plan is because I want delayed clamping, skin to skin, and my husband to look and tell me whether its a boy or a girl! I just started to wonder because I looked on the NHS website and printed off their birth plan and lots of the questions asked me to tick whether or not I had discussed matters with my midwife. Definitely agree you can't plan too much when having a baby as u never know what's going to happen! Anyway, thanks all and happy weekend x

Idea being baby stays attached for 5 or so minutes (til it's stopped pulsating) and thus gets all the cord stem cells and a lot of iron. Research suggests this leads to fewer chronic illnesses later in life, and less anaemia.

DrFluffy profile image
DrFluffy in reply to DrFluffy

That's the cord stopping pulsating, not baby ;-p

I believe this aswell with birth plans.. My friend just had her little girl last night and she made a whole planned out birth plan...none of which happened! Went all differently! I have one but only to say specifics of ONLY to be my partner in the room ( two very excited grannies who want to be in the room but is in NO way happening lol!) skin to skin contact, delayed clamping and for partner to cut cord if possible! They like you to put in your birth plan what kind of pain relief you want. Just now I am dead set against having an epidural but who knows when I'm in there and screaming the place down lol!!x

I don't think it's worth writing one but do let midwives know - if you can- one or two things you really want to happen. I had loads of wishes- like delayed cord clamp, skin to skin, my husband to cut the cord etc etc. none of which happened as I imagine no one even looked at my plan! Still a bit pi*sed off about if quite frankly. Anyway, my advice would be, if you really want something let them know LOUD and clear, otherwise it might not happen. Good luck! x

The idea is that you might forget to mention your preferences and if there's a shift change they may not pass the message on to the next midwife. I chose to write birth preferences, rather than a plan, so it was more flexible in my mind.

Some things you may want to think about: thehypnobirthingcentre.co.u....

I printed several copies so I had another one for my partner to hand to a new midwife.

cheekymonkey3791 profile image
cheekymonkey3791 in reply to

I thought u would look at your link as my friend keeps talking about the benefits if hypnobirthing but your link did not work :( x

in reply to cheekymonkey3791

Sorry, try again thehypnobirthingcentre.co.u...

Otherwise google 'hypnobirthing birth plan sample'. I loved my hypnobirthing course, it gave me confidence to give birth - something I was really terrified of doing. I googled 'hypnobirthing mongan method' to find a practitioner in my area and she was fab. Good luck.

cheekymonkey3791 profile image
cheekymonkey3791 in reply to

I think it's prob a little late for me as I'm due in 3 days but thought maybe done tips on there X

in reply to cheekymonkey3791

Ask your friend to borrow her book and speed read it. Read the contents page and skip to the birthing bits. She'll probably have a CD of birthing affirmations and the hypno talk, see if you can borrow that too. Otherwise see if you can get a copy from a bookshop.

It's all about doing the right breathing at the different parts of labour, I need to re-read my book as I've forgotten it. My husband spent most of my labour saying 'breathe all the way in and all the way out' - otherwise I would have forgotten, it helps you focus on that instead of 'pain'.

You might have a few more days than you think unless you're having a planned c-section! All the best.

Yes definitely be flexible with your birth plan and be ready in your mind for if there is change to what you wanted. Have a flexible written plan, then vocalise or get ur birthing partner to do so what you want as you go along. I liked the idea of a water birth, gas and air and obviously as little intervention as possible.....I have quite a high tolerance to pain so would really give it a go but didn't rule out other pain relief as I knew it was an experience you can't actually plan for so being open was good. However, I ended up with an emergency c section under general anaesthetic after the epidural failed 8 times!! and unconscious for the first 2 hours of my baby's life!! The polar opposite experience and if I'm honest very traumatic for myself, my baby and my partner. However, James is here now, the way it occurred wasn't perfect and planned but it brought him into my world x

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