how do I make my other half feel better?

Hi, basically wondering how to make my partner feel a little more useful. I'm not sure how as bless him at the minute he's doing almost everything and I have to politely try to ask him to do a little less. He's at work all through the week, does all the cooking, cleaning and so on. In fact, I know I've been told to rest but he leaves me with absolutely nothing to do except put my feet up making me bored (get excited when can wash my own breakfast dishes - yep that sad lol).

I know, doctors orders and I am doing as i'm told, but now have sciatica too (on top of an already bad back) so in a lot of pain. Hoping physio helps tomorrow. Anyway now apart from helping me up he can't really touch me because is just becoming so painful, even touching the bump more than very lightly is sending spikes of pain through me, the spare bed even set up in case sleeping beside one another becomes too painful. Its the last 8 weeks now, so I know even if can't be helped its not that long to go and will be more than worth a few weeks of pain. He's decorating the baby's room next week having taken his holidays off for it, and yet he's still upset he can't do more. He wants to know what he can do to help me, and there isn't anything he isn't already doing. Without starting to get annoyed with him how can I let him know just to chill out a bit? x

5 Replies

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  • Oh bless him! Sounds like a lovely man! Hes just being protective I think only thing you can do is sit him down and just have a chat reassure him you won't over do it and how fab he is being and how much you appreciate it but he needs to relax and enjoy your pregnancy too xx

  • Awww he's so lovely!you just need to show him much appreciation and tell him to chill out a bit.

  • Ahhhh bless him tell him he is doing a great job that u feel so supported and happy and if he really wants to do more could he take ur pain away; ) he isn't anxious is he may be Sit downand have a chat with him. .. order a takeaway so he doesn't have to cook one night and tell him is his night off for a change sounds like u got a good one there u lucky thing :)

  • I really am lucky, don't want to sound smug, but couldn't have got a better one. we've been together three years and never had an argument. We do takeaway once a week because I don't want him doing everything all the time, as I know his job is stressful too. Does help a bit, except he insists on going and getting it rather than letting it be delivered. Try to leave him to sleep on a weekend as my sleeping pattern is all off, and yet when I woke at 6am last sat, here he is already in the kitchen apologising if he woke me up! Asked what he was up to - mopping the floor so it would be dry when I got up and so wouldn't slip! He is usually the most laid back person I've ever known, and is still coming across that way to everyone else, but I can see the stress is getting to him. Talking doesn't seem to go in, he listens, he says he'll take it easy, then ignores it! Find myself wanting to shout at him to sit down which isn't like me, but he needs to take it easy and I've ran out of ways to say relax.

    His mum's down for the weekend so maybe she can get through to him. Also have a midwife appointment next week while he's off. Hopefully if he comes with me will help put his mind a bit more at ease x

  • Ahhh it's really nice that he wants to help all the time, my husband's a but like that & I'm only 9+2 but we r trying to sell our house & move at the same time. Why not get his favourite movie on DVD & have a night in front of the tv so that he's not doing anything or go to the cinema if u feel like it. If he's the type of man that doesn't mind a bit of pampering you could book both of u into a spa for him to get a relaxing massage while you get ur nails done if its sore for you to be touched. Hope you both manage to relax soon xxx

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