Emotions causing problems :(

Im 17 almost 18 and im pregnant with my first kid and im having the worst time coping with my emotions, im ok and happy one moment and then something someone says or does just ticks me off when i know it wouldnt normally and i say something mean and hurtful out of angry and then cry for hours because i feel so mad about what i said. i have little to no support from any one in my life, i dont live with any one in my family or either one of my parents i work full time and the only one in my life is my boyfriend, babys dad, who is on the verge of leaving because of how bad the mood swings have been, if any one has any advice with how to cope with my mood swings it would be very helpful :)

10 Replies

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  • Make sure you are getting as much sleep as possible. Maybe part of your mood is because you are tired. Also, maybe talk to your boyfriend about any worries you may have. It may be that you have concerns you are storing up an not talking about which is making you emotional? Hopefully it will pass soon hon x

  • It's overwhelming for a couple expecting a baby, it dredges up all kind of feelings from your own childhood and it also puts a completely different perspective on your relationship. It's our first and I'm looking at mine with an alternately tolerant/loving and critical eye. He's utterly emotionally stunted except about sport but I can see he's freaking out underneath. They don't know how to respond.

    To make matters worse I think a short fuse is part and parcel of all those hormones! All you can do is make sure you are eating right and sleeping lots.

    Xx

  • The 1st 12wks of pregnancy are the hardest anyway "in my opinion" have a chat to your closest friends to apologize. Your closest friends will surely understand, plus have a Lil chat about it to your boyfriend too.

    The fact that you"re working full-time too cant be easy on your body right now as there's alot of changes going on.

    Dont feel too guilty about it or anything as it happens to many women & we will always take it out on the ones close to us 1st.

  • Maybe have a talk with your boyfriend and tell him the hormonal change he is going through - I would say right now he needs to be more understanding towards you than expecting you to behave properly. Your hormones are really n time higher than normal and you cant really help it at times.

  • Hi don't feel bad that's normal because you are pregnant and still work and go to school is too much for you. We are almost the same time, when is your due date, mine is 16th December. I try to not to think about life but it's hard sometimes I am about to be homeless and I don't have money for a rent although I work full time. Well anyway you have things to be proud of, you are very beautiful first and second you look in a healthy weight not like me, I was overweight before i got pregnant and now i already look like 6 months pregnant lol. If you were near me I would talk to you although i am much older than you but I have friends your age. Think about your baby when you are sad imagine his cute face and his tiny feet and hands and you will be happy :) The best for you

  • thanks you :) and im due december 27th. and i know how almost being homeless and not having money for rent even though you work full time. im about to be homeless because the people i am staying with wont let me stay if i keep my baby. and thanks i try but even that makes me cry with happiness haha :)

  • Hey I know how you feel I am 17+3 and this morning I burst into tears in the car because someone was parked in my Parking bay! I felt so silly after I don't know where the tears came from. So don't feel bad, we all go through the emotional roller coaster. ??

  • Hi there, try not to be too hard on yourself. Pregnancy is hard, physically and emotionally, at the best of times let alone when you are so young. I would strongly suggest that you confide in your midwife and/or GP because you need to find some strong support for you, perhaps a bumps and baby group?

    I was a Mum for the first time at 19 with my family over a 100 miles away and I found it incredibly hard. My ex husband (the dad) was not particularly helpful and after I had my son trying to cope made me postnatally depressed which was recognized but not treated properly for two years.

    What I would suggest to you is that you try to reflect on the root of your fears and anxiety that relate to your age, relationships, money, hopes for the future - whatever is the most important thing to you, and be honest with yourself. At 17 you're having to come to terms with motherhood at the same time you're becoming an adult (legally) . Your relationship with your boyfriend will come under strain too because pregnancy for men is scary and for young men more so, quite simply men don't really understand much of what is happening within our bodies as the baby grows. Try not to take your stress out on him, because all that will happen is a cycle of arguments and you feeling worse. It's sometimes easier to be awful to the people we love because it feels better (at the time) than allowing ourselves to be vulnerable, but it just pushes our loved ones further away.

    With regard to your family, are you able to reach out and build stronger relationships? I would suggest you try, if you can. When I had my son, it brought up all sorts of feelings about my own childhood (which was dysfunctional due to divorce and other difficulties) and about what I perceived to be the failings of my own parents. One of the toughest things I have had to come to terms with is as a parent you can only do your best and only now as a parent and after the loss of my Dad last year, do I truly accept that my parents did their best for me, in the circumstances, at the time.

    I really feel for you, because you've got so many things to think about.

    Please be kind to yourself, stop trying to do too much, and keep talking rather than bottling it up. You and your boyfriend have so much to look forward to together. being a young parent is hard but so rewarding, I truly wish you all well, hugs x

  • Hello, I'm coming to the end of my pregnancy, 39+1 and though I've been very lucky during the majority of my pregnancy regarding illness and feeling emotional, in the last few months I've also been very emotional and felt easily angered by things. The advice I wanted to give was to remember to take care of yourself, find time to relax and apologise to those you may upset explaining it's the changes in your hormones. (It makes you feel better if you talk it through) The truth is you know it's your hormones controlling your feelings but there's really not a lot you can do but be sure it'll get better. I would be honest with your boyfriend and ask him to be there for you. Speaking to your midwife will reassure you and I found the NHS choices website to be incredibly helpful as until you've had a baby you really have no idea what to expect emotionally and physically. I've just joined this forum today and I wish I'd thought of it sooner. People seem to genuinely want to help offer their support and advice and like you I don't have a support network around me so It's lovely to be able to chat. Hope you start to feel better soon.x

  • Thank you every body for all the support and advice, ive been trying to get a hold of my family and get some more support from them but no one has time for me and half my family is happy and the other half is disappointed in me and dont want to talk to me, my family and i have had a lot of falling outs and they hold a lot of resentments towards me even if i had nothing to do with any of the situations it still gets blamed on me, i find it hard to depend on them now when in the past they turned their backs on me when i needed them the most, my boyfriend has his days were he is really understanding and helpful but it seems when i need him the most is when he isnt there and blows me off for his friends, i just found out the other day that he has been flirting with a couple other girls and it really broke me and i talked to him about it and he seemed really true about him not wanting to lose me but some part of me is scared that he was lieing to me, ive never had any one there for me and i find it hard to tell people what im actually feeling because it either gets turned back on me or brushed aside or the worst is getting yelled at for feeling that way and told that i shouldnt feel that way. im really happy and grateful i decided to search and join this website, ive been looking forward to having time to log back on and talk to everybody and see what everybody had to say :) xhugsx

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