I had my beautiful baby boy 6 weeks ago and in that time I have learned so much and without wanting to be patronising or condescending, thought I might share with others.
I ended up having a forceps delivery as I was too tired to push anymore. I knew very little about assisted deliveries so was a bit scared and upset that I had given up. However talking to the midwife afterwards, I had no idea how close we were to losing our baby. If I hadn't asked for help, there is every chance I would've ended up with an emergency c section and problems for baby.
So first tip - research assisted delivery before you give birth, just so you are prepared in case you need any help. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you get tired or feel you can't go on and NEVER feel guilty for 'giving up' you aren't, it is whatever gets that baby out!!
I wanted to go home from hospital as soon as I could as i don't like them at all! I ended up staying 2 nights because baby had a tongue tie and struggled to breastfeed. The staff were wonderful and nothing was too much bother, they would take baby if I asked them to so I could get rest, they brought me tea and toast at all hours of the day and night and I learned so many tips from them.
Second tip - don't be in a rush to get home, use the midwives for their support and knowledge and help. It also means hubby/partner can get some rest before being up with any in the night. My husband was up all night with me then didn't leave my side until baby was born. It's a knackering experience for you but it's also emotionally and physically draining for your partner too and if they've had one good rest before you come home, they are in a better position to help when you do come home.
Third tip - if you really want to breast feed, persevere. It will get easier for you and baby. Don't beat yourself up if it doesn't work instantly, it is a learning curve for you and baby but if you really want to do it, persevere, it will happen!
Fourth tip - accept whatever help is offered. Whether it is someone to clean the house or make you a meal, they will do anything in return for a baby cuddle!! Limit the visits though, they are draining on you and all you want is to hold your baby and the hormones play havoc so smiling and pretending to be ok wont help. It is natural to feel weepy for quite a while, don't hold it in, let someone else have a baby cuddle and let yourself cry.
Fifth tip - try to sleep when baby does but if yours is like mine and won't sleep in a cot during the day, cuddle them and put your feet up while they sleep. Get plenty of fresh air but take it easy until you feel like you again, you won't be up to much for a while after birth!
Sixth tip - questioning everything you do is totally natural. Go with your instinct about baby and spend lots of time getting to know them and for them to know you. Try to get out to baby groups and meet other mums, they have other tips and have been through some of the things you have and can give assurance that you aren't the only one!!
Final tip for now - you will wash your hands loads and probably get old lady dry hands!! Get some intensive moisturising hand cream to use.
Enjoy your little ones ad I hope you love being a mum as much as I do!! X
P.s. oh and that 2am feed? You aren't alone, you are not the only mum in the world up at that time and if you need a break from the crying at that time (it's always louder and more tiring at night!) wake up hubby and get him to help!!
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tigernoodles
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Fantastic blog Hun nailed it in one. Every tip is spot on and imitates they way most mothers feel. Congratulations on having your baby I hope you are well and enjoying motherhood.
Congratulations on your little boy. I wish I read this blog 4 years ago when I had my first. My lad was tongue tied and couldn't feed and the midwife didn't spot it until we had been home a week. I insisted after he was born that I wanted to go home the day after which was a bad idea.
With my 2nd I stayed in for 5 days as I had a manual removal of the Placenta but was well enjoying having one to one attention from the midwifes and having my meals brought to me. After 5 days though I thought enough was enough and needed to get home
What great tips! Talking like this makes us mums to be feel like we can do it.... I'm nervous as hell and don't want to let my baby down!
I have another 6 months to learn all the tips!!
I hope you have a wonderful summer with your new babino! Xx
*beams* I'm so pleased my lessons will help others! Motherhood is the hardest thing I've ever done but also the most rewarding and best job ever!! My little one has just started smiling and it makes the sleepless nights, dirty nappies, endless washing, sore boobs and everything else just melt into nothingness!!
However you feel, you CAN do this. I'm on autopilot some days and feel like I'll never get to curl up and watch a film with hubby ever again but oh my, he's so worth it all! You won't let baby down, you will all be amazing mums, just go with the flow and try not to stress, enjoy your bundle of joy, it's true what everyone says, it goes quick and they grow up so fast!
BRILLIANT post. Thanks for sharing
Thank you for such positive encouraging advice. The last few blogs I've read have been from new Mum's venting frustrations etc, which is understandable put adds to the fear factor for those of us who haven.t been there yet..! I am noting down all these tips right now! Keep going strong :o)
Fantastic post. Little tip to add too. If you can, get on an active birth course. My midwife ran one and I got some amazing tips on how to help get baby into the right position for birth and reduce the risks of needing assisted delivery. In the last three months there are some exercises (like rocking back and forth on all 4's - as if scrubbing the floor) to help bring baby forward... Found these good for relieving the pressure too. Best of luck new mummies. It is the hardest and most rewarding job in the world x x x
Fantastic advice. Thank you so much for sharing and taking your time to write this for us. Although I have never been mum yet (half way to go), I used to be a nanny a very long time ago so some of the tricks I know but not around the birth. I did hear some horrid and scary stories about forceps deliveries that went wrong. I am pleased you and your baby are healthy and it all ended a great success.
Enjoy your baby - yes time really flies. They dont stay small very long so treasure those special moments and take lots of pictures. x
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