Hi. I apologize ahead of time for this very lengthy post but I am hoping that somebody reading this will understand. I was diagnosed with MS in 2005 but my first episode was in 1997. I think I don't pretty well and continued teaching preschool children with disabilities until I was forced to retire in 2011 after the last bad relapse. I have been on Tysabri since 2010.
Fast forward to a few years ago when I developed severe gastroparesis (delayed stomach emptying) which threw me for a loop and FOREVER changed me. I lost a ton of weight and a ton of friends, but more importantly, I lost myself. I don't consider myself fun to be around anymore and get very nervous being around people for that reason. I am overwhelmed, especially in public. I am unable to make decisions, and get really panicked over the stupidest little things. My anxiety is through the roof. I have bad OCD now. I am on martizapine and the dr just started me on Lexapro, as well. This, of course, adds to my stress because of the potential side effects.
I have so much to be thankful for, so why do I feel this way? I have a wonderful husband who didn't believe me when I was diagnosed with MS and he stuck by me every step of the way but I feel so bad for him. I am a lot to handle these days. Thank you for listening. 😒