I don't know what to do with my OCD

[Merder007]

Hi umm...Today I was like trash and I don't know what to do with the crapy feel and the suicide thinks. They are more real and more serious. I am not feeling good and I have to say that I am okay but I'm not okay. I don't have energy, I feel bad and I don't have someone who I can talk to...

What I suppose to do? The feeling to die is getting bigger and bigger and I don't know what to do, I don't have time. I can't talk to my family and friends. The medications can't help me and where I live, there is no therapist...

[alexandraisobsessed IOCDF Advocate]

It can be hard feeling so isolated. Are you able to access therapy online at all?

[Merder007 in reply to alexandraisobsessed]

No I can't but Thank you for your idea. <3

[LuvSun]

You can talk to us in this forum. We are here to listen. Please know that you can get better and your life is so worth living. Keep pushing on - don’t ever give up.

[Merder007 in reply to LuvSun]

Thank you,I will try to not give up<3

[Gimi44]

I feel you. I have health anxiety, and I'm being checked for potential death illness in the last months. I live alone and I am really scared about the future(uncertainty) I also have more and more suicide thoughts and I have even done my will. But I am gonna keep fighting. I have increased my meds(not access to therapy either) and I am gonna keep acting as I was OK(exercising,eating well,reading,taking care of myself) It has been also important to me to commit to a long term goal(in my case doing a master that I honestly don't think I can afford) and having dreams(travelling, starting a business) I don't know if I'll be able to do all of those things but it's something I can stick to it when I feel hopeless. This is hard. One day at a time. Don't give up. We're fucking warriors 💪

[Merder007 in reply to Gimi44]

Thank you for your reply. You've helped me a lot because I was thinking that I'm alone in that feel (and thoughfo suicide) And stay strong soldier <3 <3 <3

[Mcfly64]

Keep fighting my friend. Keep coming on here and talk to us.

[Merder007 in reply to Mcfly64]

Okay. And Thank you for support. <3<3

[123ST3]

I know it doesn’t feel like it…. I’ve been there…. But it will get better. It’s literally impossible to maintain the feeling forever. Eventually you’ll just realize that a fog has lifted.Additionally - and you may or may not like this aspect - but I would say you should try reaching out to God. Cry out and let your creator know your feelings, your thoughts, your hopes and your dreams. Pray for strength, pray for wisdom… even if you’re a non believer…. What’s the worst thing that can happen???? No one hears your prayer? What’s the best thing that can happen? The divine offers your strength and wisdom?

Lastly, and I am learning to do this as well, take some time to just sit in your sadness. Don’t do anything to take you mind off of it. Let the fear overwhelm you… even dare it to break you. What you will find is that those “feelings” can’t hurt you. Way easier said than done.

Saying a prayer for you to have peace right now.