Pregnancy obsession

[disneyandme]

Hi everyone, does anyone elses OCD severely impact their ability to judge risk? Typing that out I’m realizing of course it does- but my current problem is that my brain will literally not allow me to stop obsessing that I could be pregnant even though rationally I know the chance is very minimal. I had protected sex with an ex a few days ago and my brain won’t stop going over the events and trying to figure out if it was “safe” enough and if I’m pregnant. I’m not on hormonal birth control (it severely messes with my anxiety and OCD), but we used a condom and it didn’t break but OCD hates the fact that I don’t know with 100% certainty. I replay it all in my head and start creating false memories of how the condom must have leaked etc. I was on the last day of my period, so knowing that I can’t know for sure if I’m pregnant for another month is really haunting me. In the past I have compulsively taken plan B when I feel like this, but instead I am just sitting with the uncertainty because I shouldn’t take something like plan B unless its rational but it is literally eating me alive. I’m doing my best to not engage in compulsions to find certainty, and instead I am having paralyzing anxiety in the sense that I keep just zoning out and can’t focus on my day. Not only that, but my confession OCD is making me feel extremely guilty for hooking up with someone that my family/friends dislike (for good reason). I’m only 22, and in the past my OCD would make me compulsively confess things I’ve done “wrong” to my mother which obviously only makes things worse but relieves my anxiety. I don’t want to have to do that, but I’m really struggling to cope with my anxiety surrounding this situation and don’t see my therapist for another week.

[Laurennnnnnn]

I’m so glad I saw this!! I don’t have advice but I want to tell you that you’re not alone on the pregnancy obsession.

I’m on birth control and my boyfriend pulls out. I’ve never missed a pill ever lol or been pregnant. But my brain still freaks out telling me there are signs I’m pregnant.

All that’s helped is the birth control (it hasn’t fixed the ocd of course) but it puts my mind more at ease that I’m more protected, and I also can purposely skip pills to get my period just to assure me I’m fine.

Good luck!!! 💙💙💙

[disneyandme in reply to Laurennnnnnn]

I really wish I could find a pill that works for me 😭 twice I’ve tried hormonal birth control and both times it turns me into an anxious depressed mess. I was on it for about 2 months and stopped it in May again. Ugh the struggle of being a girl while also having OCD lol

[Laurennnnnnn in reply to disneyandme]

Oh man, that’s awful 😭😭

I struggle with anxiety and depression and am super sensitive to meds. But somehow I got lucky and the first birth control pill I tried was a miracle lol

[almurray89 in reply to disneyandme]

Try a non-hormone IUD like Paragard That’s what I have because the hormones in pills messed with me also.

[JoeS00]

I get what it feels like.Could the guilt feeling be increasing your anxiety? Cause it can live with you and increase anxiety.

And good point you made that you avoid compulsions although anxiety is being severe.

Well I suggest of course to go over that with your therapist. And since you are alone now aim to get to a point where the anxiety or the intrusive thoughts don't disturb you. Breathing can help ease anxiety. Try breathing then continue what you are doing in your time immediately and give it all your focus and soon the anxiety feeling will fade. It will repeat though I know it's like a cycle but it's all about finding a strategy so that OCD doesn't take your time. Sometimes I grab onto something soft when I have an OCD attack and it just goes away.

But most importantly going over the event that's impacted your OCD can be helpful I guess.

[DeathtoOCD]

I would say go all out with it, like tell yourself yep, I am pregnant, nothing I can do about it, don't just live with uncertainly, go full into the thoughts and then habituated to it. Come up with a whole timeline of what might happen and what will happen because you are pregnant. And then just live with the anxiety.

[lml885]

I have the same exact problem. There are support groups for this- look up Tokophobia. This has SEVERELY affected me. Plus I have PMDD which causes severe hormonal issues. Women can and do get tubal ligations and hysterectomies for these issues and sometimes it saves lives, other times it causes hormonal problems. A drug for endometriosis called Orilissa worked wonders for stopping my severe reactions to hormones and also stopped me from producing eggs which lowered my ability to get pregnant.

Remember that behind every compulsion is an emotion and behind every emotion is a thought, like "It is super easy to get pregnant even with contraception" which isn't true. Examine the facts. Lots of people TRY HARD to get pregnant and don't. Plan B shouldn't be taken all the time-but it is there when you need it and as a back up.

Yet rationality doesn't work with OCD- exposure response does. Try exposing yourself to babies and or a positive pregnancy test, or think about how you would handle it if you did get pregnant- you likely already have a plan because you've been obsessing. You are being responsible, way more responsible than others.

Using two forms of BC is more than enough if you choose to have sex again, or if it is too anxiety provoking for you, you don't have to ! Abstinence is 100% guaranteed to not get you pregnant.

Also try other therapies like DBT for emotional and thought regulation and EMDR and polyvagal exercises for reducing trauma. Part of my tokophobia was induced by trauma of abuse and seeing a picture of a woman giving birth when I was 12.

[AnxiouslyZen]

Yes x100

The other day a friend said something like "I've never even taken a pregnancy test...."

Like... but what about the toilet babies?? TLC? I didn't know I was pregnant??

Oh.... right. I'm obsessing. I try and tell myself that a lot of specific conditions have to be met to actually conceive, many people I know struggle with it.